Von for Now

Ahem, Pinko

2012-01-27T06:26:00.000-08:00

Ahem, Pinko -
Sometimes,
I just
Do what I'm told.
It's possible the orange cat with the orb eyes made this happen.
Or
The undead overlord.
I'm allergic to cats.....

Kinda a bitch

2012-01-24T13:52:00.000-08:00

Last week, I was talking to VonMom.
I was filling her in on the phone call I had with my God-mother the night before.
So, of course, we were talking about VonDad.
I was reminded that VonDad had said over and over and over again that he didn't want to go out the way his best friend Bud did. Long hospital stays, sick for months and months, all of that bad business of dying. He always said he hated that's how Bud had to go, and just didn't want that for himself.
Well, VonDad got his wish. His passing took less than an hour, in the end.
VonMom looked at me and said "I want that. I want to go out like Dad did"
I could have been nice, but I'm still working on that with her and with the rest of the world I guess. Plus, it's kinda in my nature to say the first evil thing that comes to mind:
"Keep on smoking like you do, and maybe you'll get your wish"

Sometimes, I don't even know what the fuck is wrong with me.

Miss Von for now forever?

2012-01-20T10:40:00.000-08:00

I've been giving a lot of thought to my single-ness lately.

I'm trying to be more honest with myself, and in doing so, I guess that'll make me more honest with you readers.
You all know since the passing of VonDad, I've given myself the free pass of Vulnerable and Prone to Making Bad Decisions.
Not that I think any of my decisions since October have been bad. I haven't hurt anyone else, not really, and no harm has come to me.
I've got not one but two good guys who are pretty happy with the state of affairs right now. I'm happy that one is back in my life, and I'm also happy that I've gotten to know the other. If nothing else they both may end up as pretty decent friends. And, let's face it - I'm happy to be getting some on a regular basis.
there's that honesty thing, right there

Now, a few of my friends (who happen to be ladies) think that I'm acting "like a guy". I'm not sure if that's supposed to be warning, or insulting, or a compliment. I just find it confusing. I had a need, I took care of it. Luckily I am pretty charming and not a troll, so it wasn't difficult to find a couple of guys to help me out. And, truthfully, if I had more time, I'd probably add one or two more to the calendar. Variety is the spice of life.

As to the single-ness that I linger in.
I think I'd make a really shitty girlfriend, and an even worse wife. I'm just being honest here. I used to think that I'd be AWESOME as either girlfriend or wife, but now, I'm not so sure.
I have very specific things that I'm not entirely sure I can bend on:

I live alone, and have for 12 years. Therefore, I not only LOVE my free alone time, I COVET it. You can be in my house sometimes, you can even spend some Sunday time there, but sometimes, you just need to NOT.
I have one full time job that I love. I have one part time job that I also love. This means I work downtown M - F 8-5, and also work either Friday or Saturday night immediately following work until really late, sometimes on Thursday nights and oh yeah, sometimes on Sundays too. Again, I LOVE this part time job of mine, and I'm not willing to give it up. Oh, and I'm on the board of directors at DANK, which takes up whatever is left of my time. I have 11 more months of that good time, so there's that. OH AND, both part time gig and DANK are in Lincoln Square, so not that close to home.
I kinda hate talking on the phone. Sure, text me until your finger tips fall off, go to town, but really - don't call me.
I actually LIKE watching football and baseball and hockey. I also enjoy being on fantasy leagues. What I don't like? You trying to explain all of sports to me like I'm a silly little bar fly without a clue. When and if I need your help with my fantasy teams, I will ask you. With my head hung in shame.
I don't cook. I hate it. I do bake, but only sometimes, and never for myself. I bake and give it away. I will make a tray of lasagna once in a while, but that's it.
The beer in the fridge? That's mine. It's from WI and is not exported to IL, so no, you can't "just try it". Same goes for my bottle of 16 year single malt scotch. Ok, that you can have, if you know how to drink it. And if I can pour it for you.
My friends and family are important to me. It's pretty important that you can tolerate them. Oh, did I mention I have SIX siblings? All older than me? Good with that? Didn't think so.
I have tattoos, and intend to get more. I really don't care if you have an opinion on that.
I don't really want to talk politics or religion with you. Ever.

So, these might be some of the reasons that I'm still single. Even though I'm very sure I don't want to be forever. I DO want to find "the one". Or maybe "the other one". I'm just not sure how much of myself I can give up to turn my solo into a duet.

Things that piss me off Wednesday

2012-01-18T11:43:00.000-08:00

Probably a bad thing that I'm posting today when we're supposed to go dark or something.
But, hey, I rarely go with the flow, so I'll just post away.

Things that ~~stick in my craw,~~ ~~that make me throw up in my mouth,~~ that I have contempt for today:

My socks. I'm wearing awesome argyle knee socks (it's fucking cold here, people) and they won't stay up! Spending a lot of quality time pulling up my socks. I don't have time for this sock pulling upness. Just stay up. That is your only function.
My lunch. Sure, it was free which is always a plus, but it was sub-par. The thing is, we knew it would be. Kinda went like this: *sigh* "Let's go to name redacted" It's next door, and it's cold, so there you have it.
People who post the same old boring shit on teh FB. As in: Happy Hump day! One day closer to the weekend! Um, thanks, Captain Obvious, for letting us know it's Wednesday. And wow, that is the exact same thing you posted LAST Wednesday. Lame and boring. Boring and lame. Let's spice it up a bit, or not post at all, m'kay?
Female bloggers who beg cry and would swallow (yep, I said it) for attention. If no one is reading your blog? It probably sucks. If no one is replying to your comments? They're probably over you and your b.s. Just shut the fuck up and write your stupid little posts. If they get read, great if not, so what?! Does your blog make or break you as a person? Probably - about as much as interweb attention from a bunch of dudes who really don't give a shit does.
Chicago radio. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. There is NOTHING worth listening to on Chicago radio. Nothing. Even XRT is a mess of repeats. If I have to hear Pumped Up Kicks one more time in an 8 hour workday, I'll throw my Hello Kitty boom box right out the window.
SOPA and PIPA. I now understand what all of the hub bub is about, and I don't like it one bit. See, I took some time to educate myself on the topic, THEN formed an opinion. Novel idea!
That I can't park in the garage this winter. C'mon Overlord - you won't be working soon, which means you'll have plenty of time to clear the snow off of ~~your~~ VonDad's truck. I leave for work at 6:25 every day. Would be nice if I could just pull out of the garage....no snow to clean off....but nooooooo.
The whole Paula Deen thing. Do we wish her ill just because she cooks everything with a stick of butter? I think she's cute, and fun to watch. I'm sad for her, just as I'd be sad for anyone diagnosed with something sucky. Let's leave her alone.
Winter. I said it. I'm a wimp. I hate everything about winter. We've been so lucky with no real winter until very recently, but I don't care. Hate snow, hate cold, hate ice. I just want to sleep through it.

Dear You, Love Me

2012-01-13T11:36:00.000-08:00

Inspired by BeeG's high school photo post, as well as the youtube about skin cancer.

Dear 17 Year Old Von,

You think you're hot shit? Dontcha? Well, you kinda ARE. - SO shake your money maker. You are in the best shape you'll likely ever be in. And your boobs!!* So very perky!! Appreciate those before gravity sets in.

You and Laura are spending A LOT of time together. You think this will last forever, but you might be wrong, so be in the moment, be nicer, and appreciate it while you have it.

These people are not actually your friends: Anne, Rob, Mike C., Tonya, Shannon U. Do not waste any more time on them. They are useless, unpleasant, and your real friends don't really like them at all.

You are about to meet your very best dude friend - John. Just let that happen. You two will be fast friends, and ultimately, forever friends.

In a few years, you'll meet Shannon. You've been waiting for her forever. Go ahead, make the inappropriate joke about some one's wedding dress - she'll love you forever for it.

Those dorky guys you met at Quigley a few years ago? Those dudes will be your closest, most loyal, most loving friends 20 years from now. Don't spend any more time away from them. Build memories, laugh, cry, do what you need to do to let them know they matter.

Oh, and that one you dated a few years ago? He's actually the love of your life, so don't fuck up when he asks you out again in a few years. As a matter of fact, you should do your best to marry him.

The first two people that ask you to marry them? SAY NO TO BOTH.

Stop fucking up your hair. You have great hair!! Stop getting perms, stop forcing your bangs up to the sky. There will be photos and video proof of this FOREVER.

That lipstick? Doesn't work for you. As soon as you can, you need to discover and love lip gloss. Forever.

That smoking cigarettes thing you're doing? You need to stop! When you do quit, it's going to be a real bitch, so stop NOW when it'll be easier.

Have more sex. Oh, wait - you're 17 and two years away from having any sex. Go down the street to that Rollie guy - have sex with him. It'll be good. Keep doing it with him and others. Sex is awesome.

It's cool that you love music - keep loving music - Just get yourself some damn good ear plugs. Trust me. When you're in your mid-30s and you can't hear for shit, you will thank me. Or you, well me, whatever. Ear plugs - now - wear them - all the time.

Make sure that if you are going to keep being so brutally honest, you might want to make sure you can protect yourself. Not everyone thinks your honesty is the very best policy.

You are cuter, smarter, better than you think you are. Start loving yourself NOW so I won't have so much work to do later.

Love ya,
V

*Hey! Other people can talk about boobs too!!

Goodbye, Filter

2012-01-10T08:49:00.000-08:00

I've resolved to not make any resolutions.
I can't remember the last time I did and I don't really care either way.
One thing I do need to do, and it's so not a resolution, is to stop writing with a filter.
.....I'll wait for you to pick yourself up of the floor and stop laughing.........

I dislike the fact that even when I ramble and shamble over here that I always have the nagging notion that this person or that person won't like what I write. Or that this other person may have started reading, or that someone else will stop reading this.

Part of what bothers me so very much about this is that if you've ever met me - in person - then you know that I will always say what's on my mind. Regardless of whether or not it's popular opinion. So, to not do that here is more than a little silly.

So, be afraid, be very afraid. Ok, no that's not a threat, not really. Because I also know that some of the people I'm concerned about would never ever confront me about something I wrote that they didn't like.

What can you expect to be different?
More snark.
Less fluff.
More bitch.

2012 Let's mess this place up.

Music, music and more music

2012-01-06T10:54:00.000-08:00

I'm doing it again.
Writing a post, then deleting it. lather-rinse-repeat.

I don't really know what needs telling today. So here's some music stuff:

I hate Sheryl Crow. A lot. She's one of the main reasons for my dislike of female singers as a people.
That being said, there are a few female singers that I adore, damn near obsess over. TheMarty and Shannon's cousin Clare are fascinated by this. Every time I see them, they quiz me on female singers, seeing who "has it" and who does not.
Who has it? Adele - she is the QUEEN of has it. Others? Stevie Nicks, Natalie Merchant, Mary Chapin Carpenter, Janis Joplin, Sarah McLachlan, Sara Bareilles (but nothing by her that's played on the radio), Patty Smyth, Pink, Missy Higgins, Joss Stone, both Anne and Nancy Wilson.
I'm not entirely sure what "It" is. Care to think on it?
I posted lyrics from Hurt so Good yesterday on both teh FB and Twitter. No one got the reference or cared. Has John Cougar Mellencamp become obsolete?
I start guitar class again a week from tomorrow. I fully intend to do some practicin' between now and then. I intend to.
I'm also considering learning to play bass. Because I think I would be an awesome bass player. And, there's only like four strings instead of six.
I'm going to be hitting on John's bass player tomorrow - if I get him to kiss me, maybe he'll lend me one of his old bass's to learn on.
I can't decide if I want an iPod touch (which I can get now) or an iPad (which will take some time to save up for). I'm really torn on this one.
I had to turn down a ticket to the Megadeth/Motorhead show next month. I'm trying to get serious about paying down my debts, and am trying to go out less. This means less concerts. This makes me sad.
I have a friend who's a real and true Opera singer. And he's amazing. And I have every intention of going to see him perform soon. And I think if you live nearby, you should see him too.
I like Lifehouse. I admit it. Sure, it's a dirty little secret, but I do. My favorite tunes are Storm and Everything. If anyone every sang Everything to me, I'd be theirs forever timez.
I also think 3 Doors Down is an entirely under-rated band.
I think Anthax's Worship Music album is one of the completely best albums I've heard in a very very long time.
My favorite favorite favorite song right now is Bridge Over Troubled Water. For some reason it makes me think happy thoughts about my dad. I'm even considering getting some of the lyrics tattooed on me. Sail on, Silver Girl.

Yikes

2012-01-03T11:01:00.000-08:00

An interesting thing happened when I was off work these last ten days.
You think this is the lead in to a joke, but you'd be wrong.

I had four different friends, two male and two female, inform me that they are getting divorced.

I'm not going to go into other people's personal business too much here, I'm just finding the situations interesting, and the fact that these four people came to me is also interesting.

Now, the ladies both told me in person, and neither has filed for divorce, they were thinking about it. Each lady has a valid reason for thinking about this step - one a major trust issue, the other financial differences with her husband. They told me in depth what they had been going through, asked my opinion (Yes! Ask the spinster all about marriage! j/k) and wanted to talk through it all. We picked apart every "could mean" "might be" "have you/has he" possibility. Each conversation was hours long, a little weepy, a little giggly.

The men. Sigh.
First dude sent me a drunken text at 1am on Christmas Day. He basically told me he was getting divorced and don't worry about him because he's out with friends even though it's Christmas and Merry Fucking Christmas and I know you are sad and I am sad too etc....
We played phone tag for a few days until I finally got to speak with him. He told me the story, all dates and facts and concrete info. The process has already begun. They were discussing what to do with the house. I told him I loved him, sent him a flask of very expensive Scotch (he lives in another state, so we can't drink together, at least he can drink well) and am keeping tabs on him. Now, of course, his wife that I totally loved I totally now hate. I'm pretty clear on these kinds of things.

Second dude sent an email to a group of his long time friends. He said that he and his wife are divorcing, and that he would like us to keep him in our thoughts. I've tried to chat with him. He said emailing would be best, he also said he'd like to see me. I offered up a few dates in the near future that would work for me. He now responds that he's super busy with the divorce and finding a new place to live. Of course, I understand. I don't know the details on this situation yet, but he's also being very black and white.

The whole point to this post? The fact that both ladies were all emotionally driven, and the dudes were facts and figures, even though all four of my friends are clearly hurting. I'm not going to lie. I find it a little odd that these people came to me (aforementioned spinster), yet I know I am a kick-ass friend, and I'm probably the person they should turn to in this time of need.

I also know someone who should get divorced, and SOON. But that's a story for another day. Or when I'm drunk. Either way.

So, as much as I want/need/desire/require 2012 to be better for me, it's not looking so hot for some of my dear friends already. I already know that I'll be heading out of town asap to visit my friend in the other state. I already know that I'll be buying many fine beverages for my dear friend that is here, once he has time.
I also know that either way they decide, the two ladies are going to need me too.

Why don't people follow my relationship lead?........Oh, never mind......

The last for 2011, I think updated I owed an ode

2011-12-21T12:09:00.000-08:00

Making a decision to make this the last post for 2011.
Going to write all of my peeps little vonversions of Haiku.
Fuck the real rules, I'm just going 5 - 7 - 5
These are in place of the schmoopy things I originally wrote and then deleted.

Ahem

Saying Yes is boss
She is the most amazing
I am blessed with her

MenD, my buddy
My snarky partner in crime
Knowing you is grand

Zombie is my dear
Pumpkin who teaches me stuff
About music nice

Snag has snagria
A cut above all others
A friend to me now

Brando listens well
To my drunken stories swill
And yet, still my friend

BG is a saint
She hears my rant and my roar
And likes me anyway

K-Unit delight
Gives me many things to think
She is wicked smart

Mikey, Mikey, oh
Twitter chats with you are best
You know you matter

B4, before you
I was not so flirty, hm
Fun with you is FUN

Fish is not to blame
About the bad year I've had
Fish is Fish is Fish

Thunda, is there rain?
Not when I read your postings
Orbs and other things

Smut Clyde, you thrill me
I always learn something new
Eager for new words

Another Kiwi
A friend from far away - lucky
I know I am now

Mandos silent dude
Doesn't speak often lately
But sometimes, does so

Pinko, my pinko
Why no love for me at 3?
I like to comment

To those I don't like
A quick punch to your faces
Go away trolls, go

So, there you all go. My commenters, my friends, my people, my heart.
Without you I am less than, and without you, this sucky blog would not exist.
See you in 2012.*

* Unless something really awesome happens, then I'll totally write about it!

Well, F that

2011-12-19T12:07:00.000-08:00

I just wrote and deleted three different posts. I didn't like my voice at all for them. That doesn't really happen, so I'm feeling not good about trying for a fourth.
So, instead, here is the video of the song that Sister Hazel closed the show with on Friday.

For those of you not on teh FB, I need to let you know that after the show Friday night, I was genuinely, fully happy for the first time since I lost VonDad. So, love or hate the band, they did wonders for me just doing what they do. My favorite lyric of this song: Oh yeah, I might be crazy, that's not the same as insane. I know I'm scared, but that's not the same as being afraid.

Well, at least it's Friday

2011-12-16T10:30:00.000-08:00

Wow. Kinda get the feeling that I can pretty much write a bunch of nonsense here, and some people will just comment about whatever the fuck.

So, here's some nonsense.

Tonight, I go see Sister Hazel go ahead and mock, they are my favorite band to see live. I love them. I didn't get to see them at all in 2010, and I really missed them. So tonight I go. To House of Blues. No point in heading home to just head back downtown, so I'll be hanging around downtown solo for quite a bit tonight. Might get interesting.

Tomorrow night I go with VonMom and her two friends to the Songs of Good Cheer show at Old Town. This is a huge deal because: a) This show was one of VonDad's favorite things to do. b) I have never been to Old Town as a concert goer. Never. I don't even think I'll know how to just be there. I intend to be wasted anyway (see reason a)

Yesterday a little group of us from work - we are calling ourselves the South East Corner Group - went out for a little holiday lunch. Mad props to Mercat a la Planxa, home to Iron Chef Jose Garces. Informed of my food allergies, they were more than awesome to me, providing me with my own little plates of awesome when a dish contained something I could not have. Amazing food, tasty sangria. Your friend here had a little too much sangria, and now is subject to her fellow SECG people calling her Y-Von and Roxie. I need to learn now to not tell some of my highly amusing yet very personal stories.

Went to the bank yesterday to cash in a savings bond of mine that we had found in VonDad's things. Sure, the dude helping me was young, but I didn't think anything of it until he said:
"Wow! I've never seen one of these this OLD!"
Um....that was purchased for me when I was six months old. Fuck you, fuck your youth, and give me my fucking $131.57. Thanks.

Next week I am only working Monday, Wednesday and Thursday (hopefully just a 1/2 day on Thursday) and am then off until 1/3. I'm not entirely sure what kind of blogging I'll be doing in that time, part of the reason being that my internet connection at home is sketchy at best. Besides, since the end of October all I do when I'm not at work is sleep anyway, so not too much to write about there.

Anywho - so those are my tidbits for today.
Now. go do what you all do, and write about completely unrelated things in my comments.

Random stuff

2011-12-14T12:24:00.000-08:00

VonSis and I decided to get VonMom a piece of "mom jewelry" for Christmas, a little special something to make her feel special on this first Christmas without VonDad. I had the idea, I did the research, I found the necklace*. Well, ok, there were three that I liked, and I let VonSis make the final call. She picked my favorite, which has two charms - one star, one moon. Each will be engraved with one of our names. VonSis? Of course, she picked the star. It's cool though - I think the moon is more me anyway.
Both VonSis and I realized that last night, the 14th of December, neither of us had even taken the plastic wrapping off of our chocolate advent calendars. Yep, neither of us is really feeling holidayish this year.
I had dinner and drinks (ok, it was burgers and beers) with a friend last night. A friend, her husband, and their two kids. Turns out, my friend needs me. Just for someone to listen, or hug, or for advice. Time I climb out of my pity pit and help a sister out. Because lord knows she's been there for me more than a time or two. I'm happy to be needed instead of needy.
I tried to use cheesy hair metal lyrics as my FB status updates this week. I'm ashamed to say it only lasted three days. Sigh. Ok, but please note, I was trying to use lyrics that fit in to my life. So, not just throwing up an "She's only 17....". But relevant. Or, as relevant as cheesy hair metal lyrics can be.
I did use Dishwalla lyrics today, though not metal, they are the lyrics that are most like me, or so I've been told by more than a few dudes I know. They are: "You had the look like of an angel, it was such a bad disguise. When you drink it makes you angry, when I drink I want you more and more and more". Good song, better lyrics.
Friday night is the much anticipated Sister Hazel show at the HOB. Sure, I bought one ticket, and would have been totally fine going by myself. BUT - it looks like I have at least two fine people meeting me there, so it will be an even more awesome time. Sure, go ahead and mock, but I love love love Sister Hazel live, and I didn't get to see them once last year. I can't let anymore time go by without seeing them. I need the mood lifter I know their shows give me.
We're going to some fancy place tomorrow for holiday lunch. It's called Mercat a la Planxa. I was ho-hum about the decision to go there, I usually love our steak house holiday meals, but this place is owned by Iron Chef Jose Garces. NOW I'm intrigued!! I'll have to report back on that. We're also changing it up a bit, and going with some other people in the office, and not just LB1 and me. There's seven of us going all together. Should be fun.
Book club book is 1Q84 by Murakami. I sadly had to put Dance with Dragons down again, as I'm obsessed with reading the book club book the second it's assigned to us. Um, a w k w a r d - there's a whole lotta sexy times in this book. Not that I can't talk about that kind of thing with book club, but, **shuffles feet** I'm not sure I can talk about that kind of thing with book club. And I'm only about 60 pages in.

*Etsy, bitches!! Shop small businesses this season !! yeah yeah yeah!!!

99 problems

2011-12-12T11:20:00.000-08:00

I don't know why I've been on a ~~streak bender~~ tear writing about man troubles lately, but here is another story for your reading pleasure.

If you recall, I had a wicked crush on GermanClassDude for a very long time. I had promised myself that should the occasion happen that one or both of us was no longer taking the class that I would ask him out.

A while ago (kinda too embarrassed to tell you just how long ago, so a while ago) it happened. He dropped the class, as did I, and I emailed him. We emailed back and forth for a bit, and I finally hit send on this email:
'well, let me know if you want to hang out sometime!'

And I received no response.

I was bummed, then I was pissed. I could not believe that this "nice guy" was not so nice, and I went out on a limb and .......righteous indignation etc.....

And I told my best gal pals all about it.

And then they dropped the bombs on me - one right after the other:
Apparently, my email was VAGUE and could be discounted and misinterpreted etc etc etc.

Time would pass, and I would see GermanClassDude around with his cute bald head and walking his cute little dog.....and I would seethe and ignore him. Sure, on the occasions that he saw me, he'd wave, and I'd kinda pretend to not see him and just keep on driving......

Gal pals decided recently to bring up this whole debacle. And they harangued me. And pestered me. Ok, maybe they just suggested nicely that I get to the bottom of this. Were they right? Was I vague? I am never vague!! Or was I right? He wasn't interested, and was not nice guy enough to just say it......

Then last night happened. I was a little tipsy with a combination of Champagne, beer, and sugar cookies, and I went online to see who was around.
And there he was.

Sigh
Gulp

Typy type type

Hi GCG!
Hey
So, I need to ask you a question!
Ok.

And then I proceeded to go there.
I said blah blah blah.....email
He said email? refresh my memory!
I did.
Then I asked the question - vague? or not interested?
and I waited
and I opened another beer
and I waited

Ah, yes, I remember this email.
It was, without a doubt VAGUE

Oh? Ok, well sorry to bother you blah blah blah (in my brain? Why the fuck did I even bring this up! He must think I'm insane! Because clearly, I am insane!)

His response:
There's something to the not interested too - I was dating a different woman at that time. But I should have responded, either way.

No no no!! Bluster back pedal (wtf am I doing!! crazyVon! crazy!)

Him: I'm sorry, though. I wasn't sure if you wanted to "hang out" or "go out"
in for a pound, in for a penny!!!
Me: Well, I wanted to hang out to see if we should maybe go out.....

Him: Oh. Yeah, still it was vague.
Me: And I'm guessing you're not single now....
Him: Nope
Me: Friends?
Him: Sounds good.

At least I have a story to amuse you. And I'm guessing he now has a story to amuse his friends and co-workers, so there's that.

And now I know the deal.

But, really, ME?!?! VAGUE!?!??

Happy Monday

Small world, take 2

2011-12-07T13:29:00.001-08:00

Christ on a cracker.

That's what I muttered last night when:

I was sitting at Jury's having a drink with a lovely friend waiting for the rest of the book club ladies to show up
AND THEN
Lapse in Judgement 2010 walks in the fucking door.
With clearly his chubby yet not cute kinda troll looking girlfriend.

We avoided each other the entire evening.

Which didn't prevent me from thinking to myself ~~fifteen times~~ once or twice....
'Ew. I slept with him??'

It's a small world, after all.

2011-12-05T12:12:00.001-08:00

I've always thought it was not only cool, but kinda handy to know a million billion people.
Because, I know a million billion people.
I'm not stupid nor vain enough to say all of these folks are my friends, but I do know them, and they know me.
LandOverLord recently said that he and VonSis are going to create a game called Six Degrees of Von. Bet it'd be just as interesting as the Kevin Bacon version.....
And in some instances, some of them swear they know me, but I don't know them - but I blame that on my horrible memory.
Anyway.
Last night came the first but I'm certain not the last time that knowing all of these people is not a good thing.
I was hanging out with A, who is one of my current distractions. We were talking about nothing in particular, when I remembered a question I had been meaning to ask him:
V: "Where did PC go to high school?"
A: "Loyola"
V: "God fucking damn it"
A: "?"
V: "This year's lapse in judgement (known to you, dear reader, as L) knows PC."
A: "Who's that?"
V: "L" **sigh**
A: "Oh damn. I know that guy. You dated that guy?!!?!"
V: "Dated? No....I just um.....you know how it is...."
A: "That guy is a douchebag. He had some issues too"
V: "Uh, huh. Well, PC is a douchebag, so I am so not surprised they are friends"

At this point, I lost any and all interest in any further discussion on the topic. On any topic really. Truthfully, I wanted A to leave.
A is not really a stupid guy, and he told me not to be upset about the whole L thing. I informed A that he had no idea what he was talking about, and that I had no interest in talking about it further.

Sure, I get it, I did this to myself. I could have kept the knowledge to myself, and I have no idea why I even brought it up. I think I knew the truth without having A validate it for me. I had no idea that I would get bummed out about it.

My ideas of fun, frivolous place holding distractions are already getting messy. I don't know if it's me or them, but it's definitely happening. I'm wracking my brains trying to figure out why this is happening, which isn't really helping.

Turns out I might be more of a girl than I currently like to admit to myself.

F*ck you Thursday

2011-12-01T11:11:00.001-08:00

Today, I give you Fuck You Thursday

The topic of today's Fuck you? 2011.
All of it.
I'm done done done with it.

Here's a recap-
February - H1N1
March - Pneumonia
April - TMJ
May - Busted the hell out of my ankle, which lasted through August
July - This year's lapse in judgement (L bastard)
August - see July
September - Root canal that led to infection, that led to C Diff (again), that compromised my kidneys (again)
October - Lost my Dad
November - Porcupine in throat/chest cold from hell

With very few exceptions, 2011 has SUCKED for me. As in, the worst year of my life, as it contains the worst day of my life 10/23/11.

So, here I sit, counting down the days until 2012. No, I have no big plans for New Year's Eve. Likely, I'll be taking VonMom out to dinner then home to bed.

I have no hopes for 2012. I've turned in to a realist that way. No knight in shining armour will be sweeping me off my feet, I will not win the lottery, I will not write a prize winning book. I will not master the guitar and write the next great song.
I simply hope it will be slightly better than 2011.

Because I'm tired.

Totally stole this. Don't care.

2011-11-22T11:57:00.001-08:00

1) What are you reading at the moment?

A Dance with Dragons. George RR Martin
2) As a child, what did you read under the covers?
All of those evil VC Andrews books - Flowers in the Attic, etc. So scandalous.
3) Has a book ever made you cry, and if so which one?
The Time Traveler's Wife, and every freaking one of the Songs of Ice and Fire books. Stupid George RR Martin.
4) You are about to be put into solitary confinement for a year and allowed to take three books. What would you choose?
The Mists of Avalon, Pride and Prejudice, Behind the Mask: The IRA and Sinn Fein
5) Which literary character would you most like to sleep with?
The vampire LeStat
6) If you could write a self-help book, what would you call it?
You must be really F-ed, if You're Reading THIS Book

7) Which book, which play, and which poem would you make compulsory reading in high school English classes?

Book: The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao
Play: Go Ask Alice
Poem: Dr. Seuss (any and all)
8) Which party from literature would you most like to have attended?
The tea party from Alice in Wonderland
9) What would you title your memoirs?
Stop me when I'm Lying
10) If you were an actor, which literary character do you dream of playing?
Buffy from Feed

Stupid post

2011-11-21T12:25:00.001-08:00

I've written and deleted three different posts for today.
I guess that goes to show where my mind is at.
But I wanted to post something, so the fourth time may be the charm.
Weekend Highlights:

Shannon's birthday at DANK. Cupcakes, Schnapps, People, Bohnanza.
Dance show at Old Town. Not just entertaining, but truly fascinating.
Saturday night. Totally confused by my messed up memory and my misconceptions about someone. Pleasantly surprised overall.
The play list I've been working on for a while is finally finished, and finally perfect.
Solid three hour nap on Saturday, 2 1/2 hour nap Sunday.
Work thing finished, handed in, and proud feelings about that.

Weekend Lowlights:

"Tucked Dad In" aka - the interment of my Dad's ashes at the cemetery. Yes, I lost it a few times. I would have been ok-ish had the priest not brought up Thanksgiving. So I lost it.
Person I really really really dislike that I had to work with at the Old Town. I try to ignore her, but it's pretty impossible.
Breaking one of my own rules, which messed up most of my Sunday.
Had a dream about Dad, woke up sobbing, could not fall back asleep.
Questioning my ability to read people.

So busy, so I'll cheat. And break a sweat

2011-11-16T12:55:00.001-08:00

So, I was out too late (again) and didn't get any sleep (again), so I was a right Zombie when I got in my car at 6:30 this morning.
Turned on the radio.
Heard the above. I car danced my way alllll the way to the train station.

That is all.
W!O!R!D! UP!

Tough love via a guitar

2011-11-14T09:43:00.001-08:00

Last week, VonMom made this statement about VonDad's guitar:
"If you're not going to play it, then you cannot have it."
Way to tough love me, VonMom.
So, went to breakfast Saturday morning with her, and assured her that yes, the guitar was in my car, meaning yes, I was going to class.

I went to Old Town - after I parked, I realized it was the first time I'd been there since VonDad passed.
Got myself in the door, got myself signed up for class, picked up a paycheck, and headed to the store to get the guitar tuned.
Handed guitar to dude in store.
Dude: "Wow. This is a really nice guitar."
Tears.
Sigh.
So, I did go to class, knowing full well that favorite teacher man knew the situation.
"I will sit by the door, in case I need to leave."
"You do what you need to do."
Not only did I survive class, but ultimately, I enjoyed it. We played a few songs I had learned before, so it was easier than I had expected.
Whenever I looked up, teacher man was smiling in my direction, nodding his head - his way of encouraging me to keep going forward.
At one point, he said "It's like riding a bicycle." and I felt that that was true.
About half way through class, I found myself singing along and enjoying my playing, which I didn't think would happen so quickly. It was mostly bitter, small parts sweet, but I did it.

After class, teacher man said "See you next week?"
*sigh* "No, we're having my dad's internment. I'll be at the cemetery." *sigh*

One step forward, two steps back.

I mean, how could you NOT.....

2011-11-09T07:49:00.001-08:00

Man, I was TOTALLY going to marry Slash.....
But this is more about the weather and my mood than the hot that is (was?) Slash.

Enjoy, ~~minions~~ CO-HORTS (better???)

I must go wipe the sweat off my brow.

Me quoting me

2011-11-07T11:15:00.000-08:00

Yep, I said it.
Here are some of the things I said over the weekend.*
'Cause it might be entertaining.

I think J is married. Or dead. These are the only two logical explanations.
No, I did not have company last night. That was your tennant. Go, tennant, go.
Why, yes, I did throw away the Color Me Badd and the Debbie Gibson.
You can shower at my house, and sleep in my bed. I promise not to touch you.
It took me over five hours and three industrial garbage bags.
I need you to come downstairs and bring a killing thing with you.
If I can't shit, you can't sit.
Oh, my, you look so incredibly.......gay. Or Polish. Or both.
.....spins a web, from his hand, Man that's cool Spider Man!.....
I think, you know, like a spring. But not just a spring, a cool spring, with stuff in or around it.
Thank you for not making me smack your heads together.
Ain't no party like an A Team party. Which one am I again?
So I'm just supposed to rinse the still moving legs down the drain?!
and then, you know, I got those unsolicited dick pics......
How nice of him. Want to come play barbies?

See? Now it's like you were right there with me.
And yes, I was sober the entire weekend. No, no new meds, just no time to drink.

*In completely random order

borrowing Fuck you Friday

2011-11-04T09:50:00.000-07:00

So, I'm going to go ahead and borrow Fuck you Friday from the Zombie.
I don't think he'll mind.
And if he does, I apologize.

Today's target of the Fuck you Friday are the couple 'o dudes in my life who find more fun in flirting via text and email and IM than in actually hanging out in person. Flirting is fun and all, but I want MORE.

Head Games by Foreigner just popped up on the iPod - a sign? I think so!

Saluting you with a kiss to my middle finger E, A, and J.
You're almost out of chances.

Because, you know, I'm vulnerable and prone to making bad decisions......

Awesome people are awesome

2011-11-03T10:35:00.000-07:00

Against all wishes, time does indeed soldier on.
I guess I'll have to move along with it.
Back to work this week. Some days are more difficult than others, but the busy distraction is definitely good for me.

So, there was this non-Von-birthday thing last Friday night.
I had every intention of cancelling it, but VonMom argued against it, and to be honest, VonMom pretty much gets whatever she wants these days.

I went ahead with it. I sent an email to all those invited and said hey, let's all meet and have a drink to my dad instead.

I had a friend pick me up an hour early, just so I could get there and have a drink and settle in to the evening. Upon arrival, ran into two of my Old Town friends who were early for the get together. An area was secured and we got to drinking. My first drink was a perfect Rob Roy on the rocks with a twist - Dad's drink. It was super yucky, but I drank it. A steady stream of people I love started showing up. An even steadier stream of beer found it's way down my throat. A few shots decided to join the party. "To Bob!" "Yes! To Bob!" slam slam slam.

This awesome person showed up with her awesome hubbs. She said "So, a friend of mine is coming." My response "the more the merrier" and all that business.
Not long after, she said "My friend is here", so I turned around and there was this guy. I fully admit that I almost started crying to see him there, but the case of New Glarus beer he had brought me put the smile right back on my face. I made my way around the bar, and realized that a good third of the place was my friends and family. Not to mention the dear dear friend of mine who was bar tending that night. As I was talking to some people, another great friend showed up. There was hugging and happy bdaying and condolencing. yes, I totally know I made that word up, so shut up.

Wow, three of my favorite bloggy friends, all in one place! Four if you count Grizzled, and I totally do. I don't really feel I had enough time or sobriety to spend with them, but the fact that they were there is so special to me.

Sure, I got wasted, and sure, I told some people some secrets I probably should not have, but I'm hiding behind my family's statement that I am 'vulnerable and prone to making bad decisions' right now. I DO remember telling the entire bar that I got me some the night before. Why, yes, reader, you totally read that right - I got me some on my birthday. But that's a post for another day. Or, you can ask Jennifer, Z, or Brando, since I'm sure I told them the story more than once at the bar!

I received this email from eldest VonSis* the next day: 'It made me smile to see you hugging and telling every single one of your friends that you loved them last night. And I know it wasn't the booze or the cupcakes talking, you actually meant it. You told them all. That's great.'
She's right. I did hug and tell everyone that came out that night that I loved them - because I do. I don't think (aside from our parents) we tell each other that enough. As you all well know, my friends are incredibly important to me, and I do love them. Each and every one.
Sure, I may be vulnerable and prone to making bad decisions** right now, but I'm also living the John Mayer "Say what you need to say" mantra right now.
I hope that I continue to be honest with my feelings with everyone for a while, and that it's not just a knee-jerk reaction to losing my Dad. We'll see. I could use a little softening around the edges.

*Officially dropping the Step sib moniker from the J5. They're my family, and I'm going to try to keep them that way, so from now on, they'll all just be VonSis and VonBro. There are five of them, and one actual VonSis, so I'll try to be pretty clear about who's who.

**Whoever makes me a tshirt, button, wall hanging that says this phrase will be my new best friend forever. If tshirt, I'm a 3x. I like 'em big.

See that twinkly smile?

2011-11-01T10:42:00.000-07:00

Here they are, VonMom and VonDad.
See the twinkle? That's where I get it from.
This was just taken on October 2nd. At my sister's birthday party.
Such a great day - he was happy and smily and having lots of laughs.

No regrets, Dad, you and I? We loved each other well.

Fridge note:

2011-10-31T07:30:00.000-07:00

Dear -

Fish
MenD
BG
K-Unit
Pinko
AK
Smut
B4
Thunder
Mikey

Please email me your mailing address. My email is vonnie1027@hotmail.com

Thanks.

Thank you so much for the flowers. I'm touched, and grateful to know you all

2011-10-25T11:49:00.000-07:00

Everything to me

2011-10-24T20:48:00.000-07:00

This week, I had been planning to write a letter to myself, for my birthday.
But of course, life got in the way, and yesterday was the worst day of my life.
My dad died yesterday so suddenly that I'm still reeling, and in shock. So instead of sleeping or getting ready for tomorrow (which promises to be another awful day), I'm going to write him a letter.

Dear Dad,
Thank you for choosing to be my dad. With five kids already, you didn't blink an eye when you took on the tornado that was me and my sister. Thank you for loving my mother so fiercely and completely for as long as I can remember. Thank you for telling me to "look it up in the dictionary", because today my spelling, vocabulary and grammar are enviable. Thank you for telling me to "not piss my life away", because that is the reason my life is so full and awesome as it is. Thank you for loving me enough to see past the tattoos, the weird hair colors and clothes, the cranky and snarky that is me and love me every day anyway.

Thank you for handing me the unfinished crossword puzzle last Thursday with the little grin on your face, when you said "Can you help me finish it?". Thank you for asking my opinion on everything from baseball to cars to politics. Thank you for teaching me how to put air in the tires, check the oil, and jiggle the wires until it works again.

I loved that our phone calls always started with "Hi Dad it's me!" "Hello me! What's up?" and ended with a chuckle and an "Ok honey, you take care." I loved to make you laugh, and tried to do it every time I saw you. I loved your laugh, and the twinkle in your eyes, like you and I were the only ones in on the best joke ever.

You taught me just about everything I know, and I think my love of music and desire to play music comes entirely from you. I'll never forget the day you came into my room when I was blasting a new CD over and over. I expected you to tell me to turn it down. Instead, you asked who I was listening to, stayed for a minutes, said "I really like this" and walked out. I was so happy that you were so hip!

Though hugging you was so hard for me since you had become so little over the last few years, they were always good long hugs, with a bristly peck on my cheek to follow. I know you know that that was way better than the nights that I just yelled down the stairs to you "BYE DAD!" "Bye honey!"

Thank you for being so very honest with every question I've ever asked you. I think you were shocked more than once by the questions, but you always gave them thought, and answered honestly.
Thank you for having an opinion on the things I was smart enough to ask your opinions. Especially on the most important thing I ever went through on my own.
On the same note - thank you for letting me live my life as I saw fit. You really gave me wings to fly and I think you really dug watching me soar. You never meddled, I always felt like I was on this great ride, and you and Mom were watching happily from the ground, keeping an eye on me, but letting me have the loops and thrills along the way.

I love that you have always loved my friends, all of them. Though you admitted that they are a huge, diverse and sometimes motley crowd, you took pains to remember who was who, and I think you genuinely liked to be in their company, as much as they liked to be in yours. I was so proud to have "the cool Dad". I'll never forget the day you said to me "You're just like me, Vonnie. Can't leave the house without running into someone you know! Between the two of us, we probably know everyone!"

I think the universe got it right when it put our family together. There couldn't possibly be any other man who could have been my Dad. A perfect fit, even though it didn't happen the usual way. I am so grateful that there is not a moment of my life that I don't remember you in. I feel that the time I've had with you is just not enough, but 100 years wouldn't be enough.

May angels lead you in, Dad - a wonderful Dad, husband, grandpa, engineer, pool player, tenor, musician, magician, jokester, gin rummy winner, silly dude. May angels lead you in.

Party's Over

2011-10-23T10:29:00.001-07:00

Please pick up after yourself. Let's leave the place as clean as we found it. In the meantime, one more video.

Sweating all over Von's blog

2011-10-23T07:20:00.000-07:00

Invasion!!! Invasion!!!

2011-10-22T13:41:00.001-07:00

Sweat
Broken
Now

Invasion!! Invasion!!

2011-10-22T13:23:00.001-07:00

Invasion! Invasion!

2011-10-22T11:35:00.001-07:00

Von Voyage!

2011-10-21T10:35:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Thunder for the title.
I think my phone is working, but this font seems off. Who cares! We're in Boston and it's going to be wicked pisser! I may never come back .

One more before I go

2011-10-21T06:13:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd leave one more "post" before I go. If you can call posting a video a post!
I might try to post while on the road, that is if my stupid smart phone lets me!
Now, it's on to BOSTON!
HAPPY FRIDAY, SUCKAS!
Oh, you know I love you. Play nice while Von is gone. I'll be watching!

Update on the un-dateable

2011-10-17T11:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I had to quit both free dating web sites.
I had been thinking about it anyway, but then this happened:
I received not one, but TWO emails containing pictures of stranger men's penises.
And NO, I didn't ask for them.
I had been emailing with one man who seemed nice enough, and out of the blue - BAM - dick pic.
I thought, ok WTF and stopped emailing with him. Then I reported him to the site.
Logged off there, went over to the other site, same thing happens!
I sat back and did some intro-spection -
'Am I the kind of woman that attracts this? What did I do to make this happen? Who in the hell does this?! What kind of reaction are the expecting to get from that!?!?!!?'
As I got more and more irate, I just went and disabled both accounts.
Before I disabled them, I did email two other non-dick pic sending men I had been having normal chatting emails with. I gave them my phone number so they could call or text me instead.
I doubt I'll hear from either one of them.
You get what you pay for, I guess, and these sites were both free.

I did have to laugh when my new train friend B said "Well, were you disgusted by the pictures, or more.........disappointed?"

So, here I remain - Vonbyherselfforfuckingever.

I'm blaming L for my current state of being. I was totally and completely fine being alone before he got himself involved with me and then dropped off the face of the planet.
Now, I'm wanting something I hadn't wanted for a while, and confused and hurt as to why I just can't have it.

Not awesome

2011-10-13T10:00:00.000-07:00

Things are not going awesome in the world of online dating, at least for me.
I've had a few go nowhere texters.
I did meet one guy the other night.
I was sure that I would be the one to politely decline a second date, as in my opinion I was 100% dating down, but he gave me the heave ho via email the next day.
Sure, it was two hours and $4.75 of my time, but it's shaken my ability to read people.
It has also called in to question my high opinion of myself. Perhaps I am not as awesome as I think I am. Or, even worse, perhaps my personality does NOT outweigh other less stellar attributes.

Tonight, I'm supposed to be meeting Junior. I call him Junior because he is 5 years young and 3 inches shorter than what I consider my minimums. But, he's persistent, and we've had some fun via email. A little concerned we are meeting without having even exchanged phone numbers yet. Stranger still that the meeting is likely to occur at either my house or his. This is only because our first meeting plan is to have an incredibly competitive game of Scrabble. Sure, I could get murdered, or disappear, BUT if I do go to his place, it will be proof to me that he is not married.

I may be way too naive for this whole Internet dating thing. My biggest concern is this:
My friends are so fantastic, and do not lie to me. I do not lie, in fact, one of my faults is being way too honest way too much of the time. I'm finding out through this Internet trial by fire that I assume everyone is as honest as my friends and I are, all of the time. I need to stop doing that. It's not doing me any good, not in this area, at least.

So, this is more of a rant than a post. But it's all that's in my head right now.

Von for MEOW

2011-10-07T11:43:00.001-07:00

Um, so I don't have a cat, I'm allergic. But if I could, this would be my cat.
This is Simon's Cat.
If you haven't seen any of these before, you are MISSING OUT.
So check out the rest.

p.s. I do an awesome Simon's Cat voice.

p.p.s. Yes, smart asses, I totally broke a sweat posting this video for you.

Happy Friday.

Plenty of what the f.......

2011-10-05T09:24:00.000-07:00

In an effort to forget that L ever existed, and to get myself out of the emotional rut I've been in, amongst other things....
I drunkenly signed up on two free dating websites.
Why one when you can be on two??

Anyway. I did this over the weekend when I was home, alone, drunk.

So, yeah, not an awesome start right there.

The upside, though, is that I'm damn funny, even when drunk. So my profiles read wicked awesome. And I have three cute pictures of me that I put up.

I forgot about it, then went on both sites Sunday afternoon to see what was up.
Oh, F word.

Damn it all to hell. Fat fetishists (ICK) and chubby chasers galore. NOT for me.
So, I had to put the bitch beat down on every single one of those. Some were a little more persistant than others - those had to be reported to the sites. I do not play around with the nasty side of things.

Once I got over the shock of all the nasty, I weeded out some definitely nots - nicely, sent them all reply emails with various reasons why they were not the one, ending with 'Good luck with your search!' - and ended up emailing with a few very nice dudes.

It's now Wednesday, and I'm up to three Tims, who are now Tim Dom, Tim Pumpkin Hat, and Tim Cupid; Bill (fiesty one), Jeff (sweet and too young, but the email was so nice he's in the keep pile), Adam (we'll see on this one) and two other dudes I don't know the names of yet.

I'm really kinda not too serious about this, some might call them place holders (ahem, story for another day, if it ever gets fully resolved), but I'm willing to give it a shot.

The downside is that it's like a gdmn part time job. The texting, the emailing, the picture posting, the updating. Thank God both sites have apps for my Android. Still, though, it's a pain in the ass.

Currently in the lead is Tim Cupid, who I'm likely to meet this weekend. He's heading out of town next weekend for 2 months for work training. So we're going to meet to see if we want to be email or text friends while he's away. He's hilarious, and agrees that I have fantastic hair.

At the very least, you all should get some pretty good stories out of this whole thing.

And oh, yeah, my internet crushes - you probably know who you are - you're still in my heart o' hearts, you're just both so damn far away.......

Random Monday

2011-10-03T09:14:00.000-07:00

Someone is heating up something stinky. It's only 11am, c'mon people.
I'm going to see the Mekons on Wednesday. And hanging out with a Zombie. Be jealous.
Bedroom overhaul 2011 is moving forward, full steam ahead. I have about two weeks to take everything out of there and clean it. Then my bestie will be painting it. Hopefully after that the overlords will be putting it all back together when I'm out of town.
I'm going to BOSTON!! In 18 days.
Oh, and Shannon and TheMarty are going too.......
I'm learning new things about college football. I like to yell "GO BIG RED!"
I only moped minimally this past weekend. Yeah me.
Von birthday fun times is happening 10/28. Get yourselves to Chicago, and I'll buy you a beer. I swear it.
The episode of Dr. Who on Saturday blew my mind. I watched it twice. TWICE.
SNL was actually good on Saturday - Melissa McCarthy was hosting. Enough said.
I love having a DVR thingy.
I've read 27 pages of A Dance with Dragons. Only 800,000,000 to go.

All I can write today

2011-09-27T09:45:00.000-07:00

Once upon a very different time,
There was a very different girl,
With purple plaid well fought for,
A blue ring that was never quite right,
and yard and yards of perfect white satin

Movies movies movies (aka Von's boring weekend)

2011-09-19T09:46:00.000-07:00

So, L was out of town this past weekend, and likely is in the process of kicking me to the curb (more on that another day)
Which worked out well, because one of my bosses needed me to do some work over the weekend.
And by some, I mean a lot of mind numbing researchy stuff.
So I thought
'Hey! I can finally watch those two movies I've had from Netflix since June!'
I am so not kidding. What, I get busy a lot.
First up?
The Social Network. I liked this movie. I dare say I even liked it more than I thought I was going to like it.
Followed by:
The Kids are All Right. Or whatever the fuck it's called. I stopped caring by about minute 29. Needless to say, I hated this movie, and everything about it. I guess it's cool to name your kid Laser. I guess. Ok, no, it's actually not cool at all. Hated this so much, I want that time back.
Since I was on a movie kick, I ordered Paul on the tv.
I was SO disappointed in this! I am a huge Simon Pegg/Nick Frost fan. I will watch Hot Fuzz, Spaced, or Shaun of the Dead over and over and over and over.
Hated Paul. Perhaps because I hate Seth Rogen, and he voices the alien, but no, I think it was way more than that.
Sigh.
Looking for some movie redemption, and a break from working, went to see Contagion.
Great movie. Saw it with a friend who has a Master's degree in Public Health.
She filled me in on how very realistic it was.
Awesome.
Remembered my shitty health year I've been having.
Went home and googled "bubble". No such luck. I now have hand sanitizer containers just about Everywhere.

Sorry, this one is a downer

2011-09-16T11:50:00.000-07:00

You all know I'm addicted to delightful God-daughter (DGD, I'll call her for the rest of this post) like she's crack.
She's everything to me, and the closest thing I'll ever have to my own offspring.

Well, Wednesday morning, I woke up to this text from her mom:
'One of DGD's friends died. I don't think I can handle this'

Friends, DGD is 11 years old.

She's never experienced death before, being lucky to have very healthy grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. I think she had a gold fish die once, that's about it.

After a flurry of texts and emails, I found out that DGD's friend and classmate had passed away six days before his 12th birthday. He had brain cancer, and had been diagnosed under a year ago.

My stupid question was how is DGD handling it? Her mom told me that there's a lot of sobbing in their house, and things are not good.

The only thing I can think to do is cancel my plans for tonight, and go to this wake with them. Of course, both of DGD's parents will be there, but in this situation I think she needs all of the people around her that she can get. Like I said, it's the only thing I can think to do. Being with her always makes me feel better, I can only hope that I do the same for her. I don't think I'll have much to say, because what do you say? VonMom said I need to be strong for DGD. I'm not sure how strong I'll be. Admittedly, I do not have nor ever intend to have kids of my own, but if anything were to happen to DGD, Oh My God. I can't even.......

So take this for what it is. Hug someone you love today, whether they are a child or a grown up. Love someone you hug today.

And say a prayer for that poor little boy. May angels lead him in, and comfort his family.

Breaking a sweat

2011-09-14T06:39:00.001-07:00

You're welcome

And I remain....

2011-09-12T06:31:00.000-07:00

Two years ago, a reader asked what Von for now meant.
At the time, I was not prepared to answer that question.
This being my 500th post, I think it's a good time to try to explain it.

Hi, I'm Yvonne
Before I popped out of VonMom, in her head, I was to be Yvette.
She forgot.
No, I'm not kidding. She found the note in her purse a few days after she had me with Yvette written on it.
"Close enough", she thinks she said. Thank GOD, because I am so not an Yvette.
Though she tried really, really hard to get the world in general to call me EJ (middle name is actually Jae. Cool, for the mid-70s, I guess). It didn't stick. There's one person in my life who calls me EJ to this day, and I call her Sissy even though her name is Diane. EJ is ok, but like I said, it didn't stick.
VonSis wasn't down with either Yvonne (fyi, pronounced EEEEE-von, and do not fuck it up, or I will killz you) or EJ. She had her own mind, even at 1 1/2 years old.
She decided on Vonnie.
And it stuck.
From birth to mid high school. I was Vonnie to just about everyone. Even the places I worked. The Girl Scouts of Chicago organization only knows me as Vonnie.
Yes, I have corrected about nine million people that No, my name is not Bonnie. It's Vonnie. But it became second nature, like breathing.

There started to be variations, after a while: Vonster Monster, Y-von (pronounced Why-von), Y, you get the drill.

Eventually, I met Shannon. She doesn't really like nicknames, and she had a best friend growing up named Yvonne, so I started the slippery slope back to my "given name".
But I was uncomfortable in this Yvonne-skin.
Yvonne is me at work, when networking, when working at Old Town. Yvonne is very serious and task driven.
Yvonne is NOT me, at least not 100% of the time.

Then I met SIL1X, who has nicknames for just about everyone in her life. Sure, who she met was Vonnie, but who she named was Von.
I LOVED Von, pretty much more than I've ever loved a name I'd been given (ok, except for "Tuesday Night", but that's another story for another time).
Von is the social butterfly made of metal. She was a teenage anarchist. She is the music loving, wishing to dye her hair blue to this day, rebel who still owns her black leather motorcycle jacket. Von, it turns out, is pretty bad ass.
No wonder some people who had been in my life longer than others did not take to Von. Not only did they not take to it, they hated it. Perhaps Von is not the person they think I am, or want me to be.

So, when I decided to start this whole blogging thing (holy shit, 500 posts ago!), I started thinking about a name. I didn't want anything trite, lame, bland.
I realized that I am not a still pond. I am a roiling ocean - ever changing, ever challenging.
As I change, so does my name. As I grow, so does my life.

So there you have it. I am Von, for now.

And as it is my 500th post - I want to say part of who I am today, mostly the good parts, I thank you all for. Most especially: Jennifer, Mendacious, Zombie, Brando, Becky, BG, K-Unit, Mikey, B4, Snag, Fish, Thunda, my beloved New Zealanders and Mandos. Wicked props to TheMarty and of course Shannon, for showing me this wacky wonderful world of blogging.
Hope you all keep reading, and I'll keep writing.

A GENTLE reminder

2011-09-09T13:31:00.000-07:00

Ahem
I NEVER got my Toy Story aliens (THE CLAW!!!) cake last year.
So
Y'all have 48 days to get that done.

Here's a picture, to get your creativity all awhirl.

Just saying

2011-09-09T11:37:00.000-07:00

My personal laptop is on the fritz. Again.
Normally this would freak me out, I mean, if I don't buy at least a handful of songs on iTunes, I go through withdrawal.....but anyway.
This time, I took a deep breath
and called my brother. Both brothers have mad skillz when it comes to anything computer related, but I called the one that has a link up installed on my computer.
"Hi. My computer is broken."
"again"
"Yes, again."
----silence----
"Ok, so it won't connect to the internet, like at all. You fix?"
----silence----
"So, um, can you get into my computer and look around?"
*chuckle* "You don't have internet. So no, I can't get in and look around"
hahahahahaaaa
It would be funny if it wasn't so unfunny
Because he's awesome, he agreed to come over last night and check things out.
After about two hours of messing and digging and digging and restarting and me whining that I was hungry he offered to take it home so he could mess with it when he had time.
Of course I agreed to that.
I also agreed to tag along to dinner with him and his lovely wife.
Which he paid for.

The point of my boring Friday tale?
See, I spend a lot of time talking about how awesome my friends are, and how much more they are to me than my own family.
And then something like this happens, and I have to say to myself
"Hey, my family is pretty cool sometimes too"

Now go hug a family member or something

Random schtuff

2011-09-07T12:16:00.000-07:00

Yes, blogger, I am aware I have 4 three posts to go before the big 5-0-0. I'm still thinking about that one.
When it comes to people in general, I am wicked good at dealing with them, when it comes to men I fancy, I have zero clue what I'm doing.
I CAN survive and stay awake for a 6 + hour drive that begins at midnight after working seven hours and being up all day without a nap.
I can do the above because Shannon is hilarious, and incredibly easy to talk to, and my best friend.
I can also survive the car ride when the destination is the North Woods of WI. So so so pretty. Too bad it was such a short trip.
Sometimes my food allergies and food hang ups (ie, I do not eat ribs or chicken wings simply because I cannot eat meat on the bone. If my teeth hit bone, the meal is over for me) make me very shy and self-conscious.
New people can be entertaining, but pretension can be annoying.
New Glarus beer is my favorite beer right now. Again? Still? Either way, yum.
I do not like the show "Big Sexy". The girls on it make fun of skinny girls. Not cool, ladies.
I will always help clean up any mess I made, but will punch someone if I have to clean up a mess I had no part of.
Playing games is super fun. I don't think I play enough games. I need to start scheduling some game nights or something. Plus, playing games often leads to fantastic inside jokes - even if you just met someone.
I fear a man who carries a machete around for fun.
I cannot go two and a half days without listening to my music, or music I like. Sorry TheMarty and Shannon, I needed it like a drug on the drive home.
Eight people in a cabin, five men and three women, and only one bathroom. Not a problem. This time.
I'll be in Boston in eight weeks. Who's counting? I'm counting. Didn't make it out there last year, missing it like a phantom limb.
L's favorite band is Rush. I know this is a problem for some friends, and a bonus for others. I think it's funny.

And how was your weekend?

Just thinking

2011-08-31T09:34:00.000-07:00

I don't watch reality television, pretty much ever.
Sure, I'll admit to recording (dvring?) every episode of My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding over the weekend, and staring transfixed at that for hours, but beyond that, I don't do it.
I don't count Food Network shows (Iron Chef, the Best Thing I Ever Ate, Dinner Impossible) as reality tv.
But
I saw a promo that intrigued me. Some channel is debuting a show called "Big Sexy". I think it's just a few episodes, following some charmingly chubby chicks in some big city, New York, likely. I think they do or want to work in fashion somehow. There's like five of them or four.
See how well I pay attention?
What I found interesting in the promo was how one of the women said
"Some people don't get that not all fat chicks want to be thin"
Huh
I could totally be friends with these girls. It appears we are like-minded.
I saw bravo to the network (not sure which one) is going to be airing this show, and double brava to the women in the show.
I'm all for fat acceptance, and promoting body positive ideas. I hope the show does well.
No
I won't be watching it, because it's still reality tv. I believe more in getting out and living my life, rather than sitting on my ass watching other people's lives on tv.
Plus
My life is WAY more fun and interesting than anything I could watch on tv.

That's what friends are for....

2011-08-29T09:15:00.000-07:00

I've got the greatest friends EVER.

You know how I know?

Because they are there for me, at the drop of a hat, every time.

Thought I had plans Friday night, turns out I was wrong. Found out late Thursday night, when L deigned to spend about an hour with me.

Woke up Friday morning in a panic - I was in NO mood to stay home Friday night. That would have been pretty awful, considering my mood lately.

I calmed the F down, and made a quick list in my head. Texted first person at 7:45 am.
"You free tonight?"
Alas, no.
Texted next person on list at 8:01 am.
"You free tonight?"
8:03am
"Yes I am!!"
Ah, the tricycle of awesome is truly awesome.
Shannon got us a reservation at Hearty Boys Restaurant. Wow, we had a fantastic meal!! And some good honest conversation, which I needed. And some drinks. I'm SO off the wagon.

Saturday was Toni's big 4-0 birthday dinner. Spent a perfect evening at Old Oak Tap. So good. Good food, good company. Sure, L didn't show up like he had said he would, but I didn't let it ruin my evening.

Sunday, the first person I texted on Friday texted me.....
"What are you doing today?"
My response was that I had to work at Old Town at 5, but was free before then.
Her response:
"Come over at 3 for fried chicken!"
As in, homemade fried chicken.
Ended up having a fantastic dinner with four people that I really love spending time with. It was a shame I had to leave so soon, but it was still a blast!

Got to Old Town right on time, and immediately fell into massive crush mode with the entire band Mountain Heart.
They were fantastic, adorable, talented, did I mention adorable, fun.... I highly recommend you check them out. Whole lotta fun. And adorable.

So, while I remain disappointed in the L situation, I'm more than making the best of it. It helps when you have the greatest friends in the world.

Evil iPod

2011-08-23T12:19:00.000-07:00

My iPod is with me today, and on shuffle.
And it's totally messing with my heart feelings this afternoon.
After a calm morning of some good tunes, it's now gone all 666 on my little ticker.

First:
"Lips of an Angel" by Hinder
then:
"Everthing Changes" by Stained
followed by:
"Let it Happen" by Jimmy Eat World
and then:
"You and I Both" by Jason Mraz

Fucking hell, iPod, do you want me jumping out a window?
I'm trying to get some man problems OUT of my head, not dwell on them!
Music - it can fuck me up like nothing else.

Yet, I never turn it off.......

Deleted

2011-08-22T12:40:00.001-07:00

I totally had to delete the last post posted.

It was crap.

Yep, still breathing

2011-08-15T11:48:00.000-07:00

Just realized it's been a while since I've posted, and I've got my own rules about these things, so I'm past due to type at you.

I am, as the title suggests, still breathing. Health-wise everything is pretty good. Down to physical therapy once a week for the busted ankle, and no new aches, pains or illlnesses.

Otherwise, not so awesome. I have a bad feeling about the guy thing that has been going on for the past month or so. And I know to trust my bad feelings. So, I wait for the other shoe to drop, or the blow off to occur, or whatever. I had spent the first two weeks of this "thing" happily ensconced in "whatever land" where I would be ok either way. The second two weeks I dared to hope for more/better, and it's looking like that didn't do me any good.
So, I'm working my way back to whatever land. It's not going well.
Damn me for being such a thinker.

Doesn't help that I'm on the wagon, and intend to stay firmly on said wagon until the end of September. I'm telling you, if anyone needs a drink right about now, it's ME.

I did survive/do ok at my first show actually Working at Old Town in my new jobby. Admittedly I was ~~terrified~~ extremely nervous through most of the evening, but I got through it without having to ask too many questions, and I was able to complete my checklist for the show, so I count that as a win. Two weeks before my next show, but I don't think I'll forget too much.

Work work is good. Things are steady busy, which provides some distraction from my ever-churning brain.

Chicago has the shittiest radio stations on the planet. Consider this today's public service announcement.

The return of Fun Friday

2011-08-05T07:45:00.000-07:00

I was just told the best thing ever, courtesy of TheMarty:

You are a social butterfly. Made of metal.

This is going to be my new motto/descriptor.

So - ~~minions~~ friendz:

What is the best compliment or description of you have you heard?

yes, I'm going schmoopy mushy for the day. Don't get used to it!

Nothing

2011-08-03T10:12:00.000-07:00

So, I just typed and deleted and then typed and deleted and then typed and deleted some more.

I'm feeling extra bitchy snarky today, but am not interested in burning any bridges today.

So, you get nothing.

Because I'm feeling a little too mean and evil, even for me.

Go ahead and laugh......

2011-08-01T11:20:00.000-07:00

......just know that I can punch. Hard.

I went to see Night Ranger, Foreigner, and Journey on Saturday.
And of course, because I'm me, there's so much more to this story!!

My friend S had purchased the tickets, so I just assumed I'd be making the 90+ minute trek out to the burbs with her.
HA
Not the plan.
S was on vacation until Saturday, and her plan was to meet us there.
Us being me, and her barely friend and his friend.
So, I ended up having to ride out to Tinley Park with two complete strangers.
NO
I didn't think they were going to kill me when the plan was formulated. I didn't think anything of it until other people in my life started to freak out about it, thus freaking ME out.
Clearly, I am not dead.
AND
Me being me, they found me to be wonderful, delightful, charming company - or so they kept saying over and over and over.

Alas, due to missing our exit (because I am all of those adjectives, and the conversation just flowed!) we also missed Night Ranger. Who performed a couple of Damn Yankees songs too - it doesn't suck to have lead singers who were in other bands.

I was super girly excited to see Foreigner. I had forgotten how much I loved them!! Ok, sure, haters, it's not the original singer - but new guy did really well. I was hoping for Say you Will, but nope. They encored with a lengthy guitar filled Jukebox Hero. And yes, they did sing Dirty White Boy. I'm adding my Foreigner to the iPod tonight. And putting it on repeat.

Admittedly, I was less excited about Journey. New guy? Asian? Young. And then, little dude started to sing. If you closed your eyes through the whole set, you could have swore that Steven Perry was up there. Plus little dude was excited and energetic and a pleasure to watch. Sure, I sat during their new tunes (yawn), but LEPT out of my seat for every older one.

Thankfully, S drove me home so I wouldn't have to ride back with the two strangers. Sure, they were fun, but still.....

Go ahead, make your hate haters, just know that I will remember........and I will punch you.

Happy Monday!

Not bad, really, and how are you?

2011-07-25T10:23:00.000-07:00

I honestly had no idea it had been almost a full week since my last post. Sorry about that, lords and ladies.
I've been obsessively following SDCC* on twitter, working, twirling my hair, going on dates, doing laundry, etc.

Bad things have happened in this world in the past number of days.
Is it right to blog about nonsense?
I guess. I don't even know where to begin on Norway things, and I don't have too much to say on the Winehouse thing.
Ok, just one thing - let's not induct her in the 27 club just yet. She was 27, true, but that's where the connection needs to end, m'kay?

I wasn't even sure I'd post today, but then read a fantastic post over here by my good buddy
and realized that even though I may fear it, the big 5-0-0 fast approaches. But his post gave me some great ideas. IwillNOTstealidea IwillNOTstealidea IwillNOTstealidea......

I'm not going to review my weekend for you here today. I don't want to bore you with that, nor do I want to cat-vaccuum this post to hell by just repeating what I do.

I will say that I'm kinda glad that I have more to think about these days than I have for a while. And by more, I think I mean it in a good way. We'll see. I'm just going to chill out and let things play out. I can't really do much more than that.

I'm 325 pages into the 967 pages of "Clash of Kings". I'm way into it. WAY into it. The first 100 pages weren't really doing it for me, then something changed and I cannot put it down.

I get to go to see regular Doc for my 6 month check up today. Can't wait to show her the letter that informed me I had been exposed to Legionnaire's disease while I was in Vegas. Awesome. No worries, mah frenz, I'm well past the time that symptoms should appear. Better safe than sorry, though, so I'm going to tell the Doc about it.

I'm more glad than I can say that Shannon and TheMarty are home from their 2 week trip. I missed them, and tweeting/texting back and forth minimally just did not cut it. Plus, I need a ride across the WI border to get me some New Glarus beer. I'm going to bribe them with gas money and lunch.

Other than that.....life goes on, t.v. gets dvr'ed for a later date, blogs get read and written, the world keeps spinning. And sometimes, when I'm lucky, like today, I'm reminded just how much I adore the song "Let It Be". I was lucky enough to hear it this morning and just zen out for a bit. Making the lyrics my theme for the rest of 2011. It can only serve me well, I'm thinking

*San Diego Comic Con - are you fucking kidding me that you didn't know?!?!

So, things don't really suck these days.

2011-07-19T09:49:00.000-07:00

I love when people at work ask me:
"Didya have a good weekend?"
Because then I can answer:
"Of course! Have you met me?"

Sure, it makes me sound a little bitchy, but I really do have good weekends, pretty much all the time. This year's exceptions being when I am sick or injured.

Anyway - so this weekend I:

Tried chicken and apple sausage. I was sure I would hate it. I didn't. I liked it. Yummy.
Met up with two friends for some martinis very last minute, but so glad to see them and spend some quality time with normal, caring people. The friends in my life do not suck.
Took my coveted photo print thingy I bought from BK (Blue Girl's talented offspring) to a frame shop. Very excited about my background-mat-thingy that is red and matches part of the photo, and the gold washed wood frame that brings out other colors. Pricey to frame, but soooo worth it. Plus I know someone at the frame shop, so I got a deal. Of course I "knew someone", this is Chicago. Every has either "got a guy" or "knows someone" just about everywhere.
Painted my finger nails blue. That is how I roll. A shade of blue that also matches the above mentioned photo.
Spent a very awesome evening with John and Toni and a couple of John's friends. Might be an interesting development coming from that evening. We'll see. "We'll see" is also the theme of the development. I will surely keep you all posted. But as of right now, this is all coming at me out of waaaaay the fuck in left field, so I need some time to process it and let it play out. Once there's something actual to tell, I will!
Went to bed at 4am on Sunday, and was wide awake at 8:30 am on Sunday. I can still hang.
Was completely useless on Sunday - to the point that I spent the entire day watching all of my dvr'd shows. Shit, I watch A LOT of summer t.v. programming. Help me, I'm turning into my mother on that front.
Purchased all of the ingredients for a dinner meal dish thingy that I would like to make and eat. Then, the temperature went way way way up, so no cooking in my house for this week. But I'm excited to try to cook something, and will do so as soon as it's ok for me to use the oven/stove top whatever!

Easy peasy

2011-07-15T10:31:00.001-07:00

Easiest way to delay 500th post?
Don't post.
he hehheheheeehee.

Sorry, kids, I've got nothing.
Work is kicking my ass this week, and doesn't really allow for play time.

Huh, look at that.

2011-07-13T06:51:00.001-07:00

I'm 15 posts away from #500.
Shocked and awed that I'm approaching that number.

What do you want to read about in the big 5 0 0 ?

Ask and you may receive.....

Mish mosh

2011-07-12T09:31:00.000-07:00

When I got to work this morning, something awesome was waiting for me. And I do not mean the Tiffany & Co playing cards I got from my boss. I received a picture I had begged for. BG's offspring has a knack for photography, and I've fallen in like with many of the pictures he's taken. So much so that I purchased one. And it's here! And it's fantastic! And I cannot wait to frame it and hang it in my living room. So cool. It reminds me that if had never started this b.s. I call VFN, I wouldn't have all of you endearing, interesting, fantastic people in my life. I heart you all, muchly.*
My weekend working Folk & Roots kicked my ass. I took a personal day yesterday to sleep in, do laundry, get some things in order. I was lucky enough to spend some time with Sil1x, and also with delightful God-daughter and family. It was a great, if hot and humid, weekend, and a good day off. I'm still tired, and my ankle is screaming at me, but whatever.
Why, yes readers, we are going to ignore the fact I made a slight change last week. **I smile brightly at you**
I don't understand why every time I'm in a party-party drinking situation (aka Sunday night at F&R), I get chatted up by the hot preppy guys. WTF. Clearly, they will not be taking me home or asking for my digits, but for some reason I'm the go to girl to chat up. Upon reflection, I realize that this happens to me All The Time. Again, I have to say, WTF?
I fear my book club is in danger. The same club that I have kept running for two and 1/2 years so far. I might have to go tough love on the current planner. If she does not plan a meeting soon for the awful crap she made us read, I'm moving on to the next book with no meeting. No one fucks up my book club. The book, "Jimmie Hendrix turns 80" we started reading in the end of May. It's time for a meeting!!!
I started physical therapy with my Chiropractor yesterday for my ankle. He's fixed my foot and worked on my knees, so I figured I'd give him a shot at the ankle. He's got a lot of work cut out for him, as I waited too long to go to him, but he's up to the challenge!! He started yesterday. Of course today my ankle hurts, but it's always that way at first, plus I did a lot of walking for the fest all weekend. I just want to be better and move on! He said I have at least 12 appointments ahead of me. He's the boss!
I'm obsessed with "Falling Skies". If you aren't watching it, you should be. Thanks to TheMarty for making me watch the first few episodes when we were in Michigan.

*Thank you, Mikey, for checking on me this weekend. You don't know how much I appreciate it. You're the best.

Yes, Michigan

2011-07-06T11:31:00.000-07:00

Man, I sure would love to tell you all about happy Michigan fun times.
But I'm pretty sure that a detailed recapping is not allowed.
It's a what happens in Michigan stays in Michigan, even when it happens in Indiana kind of thing.
But maybe I can share some highlights without getting removed from the tricycle of awesome.
Let's see:

The sunrise sampler is truly the best value at Cracker Barrel, so why get anything else?
The staff at the Steak n' Shake in Elkhart Indiana are not only super-de-duper nice, but also they are all cute as buttons. The kind of people I have to make faces at, just because.
Seeing a movie when it's just you and your friends is really awesome. Even if the movie was XMen First Class and you wanted to see Transformers 3 but whatever.
Freedom drinks are delicious. When you drink them out of a straw, you get knocked on your ass by the very first one, in about 30 seconds.
Shannon's freedom drink is stronger than anyone else's freedom drink.
TheMarty prefers that his freedom drink be made with "the good stuff", and not the juice that tastes "like ass".
When freedom drink is laughed into my lungs, it's not awesome. Nor tasty.
Shannon's college bound cousin Clare is now the streamers on the tricycle. Because really, what good is tricycle with no streamers?
Hodor makes a sub-par rescue word. When spoken it only gets a chuckle in response, and no actual rescuing.
The game Ticket to Ride is super awesome, especially when I win.
So is Uno, but only when I win.
Spicy farcle is not, because I never win.
When the weather man says 30% chance of rain two days in a row, he really means 0% one day and 100% the other. Good luck figuring out which.
Awesome Chicago storms only happen when I am not in Chicago, apparently.
Someone I know is nowhere cool enough to be asexual. This is a fact.
Creepy old men are everywhere. EVERYWHERE
When playing catch phrase, and the clue is "Von needs one of these......" the answer is NOT "breast implant"

I don't think I can give you anymore than that.

Thanks for nothing, John Hughes and Winnie Holzman

2011-06-29T07:40:00.000-07:00

I've been reading this book. It's a collection of essays inspired by John Hughes films. I've also been watching My So-Called Life reruns on Sundance.
And I had a revelation.
No wonder I'm fucking single.

John Hughes and Winnie Holzman ruined romance for me at a very young age. And continue to ruin me. If I'm flipping through the channels and I come across any John Hughes film (ok, except The Great Outdoors, I don't like that one) I stop and watch and sigh and cry.

And, oh my, My So-Called Life - how much was I like Angela Chase? I think I still AM like Angela Chase. I do have trouble wrapping my head around Jordan Catalano being the same dude who now has a pink mo-hawk and fronts one of my favorite bands, but whatever.

I just wanted the MSCL episode where Angela and Ricky go to Jordan's band practice and she thinks the song he is singing he wrote for her. Double sigh. I can't tell you how many band practices I went to, just to be in the same building as the boy I liked, and hoped and prayed that the special meaning I inferred from the lyrics were true. Thankfully, I don't do that anymore. Yes, I still know a few bands, and I'm sure they do practice somewhere, but I think it would be pretty pathetic of me to hang out there and flip my hair and sigh. But still - that episode had my stomach turning - in nostalgia and bittersweet ness.

One of the essays I read recently was about Some Kind of Wonderful - which happens to be my favorite John Hughes movie. I was Watts. In a lot of ways, I AM Watts. Ok, not thin, and I would never wear my hair that short, but in many other ways. The essay was all about the high school and college love triangles, or as the song says "You love her, but she loves him, and he loves somebody else, you just can't win". The essay was pretty black and white - the writer wondering if she had paid attention to the ones that loved her if her life would have been different. Oh, fuck, this could not have hit closer to home. And I do wonder, often enough, what could have been if I had been paying better attention back then.

I now realize that my Blane, Keith, Jake Ryan, Jordan Catalano, even my Duckie will never ever exist. There is no guy who will buy me a cake and pick me up in his Porsche on my birthday. No one will ever tell me he loves me, always to the aching tune of "If you Leave", no one to, while dyslexic, write a song about his car that I will instead pretend is about me. And no one to ride his bike past my house on a daily basis. And for all of these delusions of romance, I still have to blame John and Winnie.

I need to give it all up. Ok, maybe not the dream of playing the drums like Watts in the opening credits of SKOW, because that's still pretty awesome, but the rest of it.

It may be time to let a real man, faults and all love me for me, and not the me I think is Angela Chase, or Amanda Jones, or Andi, or even Watts.

Vegas, Baby

2011-06-27T11:22:00.000-07:00

It's been another whirlwind in this life of mine.
Last week I was in Vegas for my work's annual meeting. Much like the losers at the Oscars, my position is the same - I'm just happy to be invited. It is not common at all in the big huge company I work for that coordinators ever get to go to these things. I have been to every one since I've been here.
This was the first time since I've started that it hasn't been in New York. It was a crazy, busy, active, exciting, delightful few days.
Here's some of the highlights:

Saw my first ever Cirque Du Soleil show - we saw Mystere the first night we were there. Lovely. Weird, but lovely.
Watched all of my team ride the Big Shot - at the top of the Stratosphere hotel. Too cool.
Had dinner and drinks at the Foundation Room at the House of Blues compliments of Dan Akroyd. Yep, you read that right - Dan Akroyd. Now, go out and get you some Crystal Head vodka, because it's delicious.
Had cocktails in the Minus 5 ice bar.
I drank $120 worth of tequila, but because I am me, and turned on the charm, I got them all for free. Now go out and try you some Don Julio 1842 and Sauza Three Generations. Expensive? Yes, but trust me.
113 is truly survivable because it's a 'dry heat'.
and last but not least I RODE IN A HELICOPTER INTO THE GRAND CANYON. We landed IN the Grand Canyon and had drinks and walked around.
See above - I rode in a fucking helicopter.

And oh yeah, there was a lot of work stuff going on too....

Today I'm taking care of a sunburn, due to the fact that I rode a float in Chicago's Pride parade yesterday. Another once in a lifetime experience! DANK Haus had a float, and I went along for the ride. Sure, I saw a lot of things in the crowd I wish I had never seen, but wow, what a crazy time.*

So, I live, the ankle continues its slow recovery, and it's back to business as usual.
Kinda.
I'm off to MI with Shannon and TheMarty for the annual rest/recovery/Freedom drinks/4th of July trip. We leave Wednesday afternoon. Not a moment too soon. We'll be back on the 4th. So, you may not hear from me until after that, but I'll try.

Stay classy.

*Me? Nope, not a lesbian, I'm straight as they come, but I do support the rights of everyone. And Pride parade is a wonderful celebration of all things awesome, unique and diverse. I was proud to be there. Like one sign I saw said "Gay for a Day" sure, I'd say that was it.

Full moon crazy

2011-06-15T11:02:00.000-07:00

This full moon has got me full on crazy.

Last night, I was just mopey and bummed out for no reason. Then I called Shannon, and we laughed and laughed and laughed. Then I went to bed mopey and bummed.

Today? I'm all giddy and singing and chair dancing*. And happy, and having a good ole time.

Full moons and Scorpios get along about as well as I do with 2011.

The fight with real shoes continues. Out of seven pairs of real shoes (aka work/dress shoes) only one has fit on my bad foot so far. And as of Monday I'll be needing to wear real shoes for the week at our annual sales meeting. Huh, not going so well.

*Jennifer - chair dancing is NOT lap dancing, it's dancing while seated at the desk, in the chair.

Back to decent

2011-06-13T11:30:00.000-07:00

Thought you'd all like to know I am at work today sans crutch. Just me and an ace bandage.
And clothes, of course. *

I decided that this past weekend would be the return to my normal way of life, aka Busy.

Friday night, though wicked cold and foggy/drizzly, I went to see the Judds with my sister and nephew. About two hours before they were picking me up, I found out that we would be meeting them. mini Squee. I mean, whether you like country music or not, these ladies are Legends. Yes, capital L Legends. So we line up back stage pre-show, get our talking to - No autographs, only one picture by their photographer, no purses, crutches, etc..... I got it. I paid attention. Don't want to get tossed pre-photo op. In walks Naomi and Wynonna. I actually giggle and clap my hands together. Again - Legends. Sister, nephew and I opt for a picture with all three of us in it. Minimal chatting, and I go to leave. I grab my crutch from who I'm pretty sure was Wynonna's daughter, and start to hobble out. I feel someone touching my sleeve. I turn around - it's Naomi "Thanks for coming Sugar!" she says and beams at me. I mumble thanks and get out of there. We had really awesome seats for the show. Wynonna sang two Elvis songs and one Foreigner song. I had forgotten what fantastic entertainers they both are. A good time, overall.

Saturday my ass was up at the crack of dawn for VonParents' neighborhood garage sale. It's a big deal - the whole neighborhood gets involved. It's crazy. I made it for about one hour when my ankle said 'F you, lady, that's enough!' and I hobbled back to VonParents' house to relax. Ran some errands, then worked the Booker T show at Old Town. Which was awesome. Really awesome.

Sunday I ran many many errands for many hours. Sunday night is my t.v. night, with both Game of Thrones and The Killing on. I made a pizza and rested up.

So, a great weekend with my back in the swing of things (for the most part - I do still hobble) and a lot of great great music.

*Dirty birds, I know you went there

New (to me) music Friday

2011-06-10T09:31:00.000-07:00

So, this guy sang the national anthem at the White Sox game I went to recently.
And he Blew.My.Mind.
So I went on the ole iTunes and bought an ever-lovin' shit ton of his music.
Because, you see...
He Blows.My.Mind.

If you've already heard of him, that's awesome, and you are way cooler than me.
If not, get thee to the iTunes and buy massive quantities of his songs. You will not be disappointed.

And I have to say - this song? It's just SEXY

And yes, I did break a sweat posting that video.
Happy Friday, bitches.

People I want to beat with my crutch

2011-06-08T11:33:00.000-07:00

A mish mash of sorts, just to clear my head.

So, my intern started this week. A nice girl, a very quiet girl. A girl who over-stated (by a city mile, people) her computer skillz/knowledge. It's going to be a looooong 10 weeks.
People, please, tell your children - they aren't doing anyone any good by lying on their resume. I'm going to have to develop the patience of a saint. Today, I just want to beat her with my crutch.

It's 96 here in Chicago. I will not complain about this. I hate snow, and ice, and winter and blizzards. I can tolerate 80 at 7am. I work in a/c. I live in a/c. I have cold water, and movie theaters, and frozen fruit. I also have cold beer. Cold New Glarus beer. The people that are complaining about the heat? I want to beat them with my crutch. Seriously - if you hate the weather here all the time? Then get the fuck out. We don't want your kind anyway.

The people that do not let me sit on a bench, on the train, or on the bus? I want to beat them with my crutch.

The guy who is causing me stress regarding home improvement 2011 I want to beat with my crutch. This story is still developing -stay tuned.

The "wildings" or "flash mobs" who are attacking people in the neighborhood that I work in. A) Not cool beating people up for the fuck of it B) Not cool tarnishing the term "flash mob". I still want to do a flash mob - a fun one, involving dancing or singing or some such thing - and now that'll be all messed up thanks to them. I want to beat them with my crutch, soundly, for every person they've beat up in recent days/weeks.

The stars of Hangover II I want to beat with my crutch, and I haven't even seen it. I have no desire to see it. Over Kill.

The makers of Plants vs Zombies I want to beat with my crutch. And the zombies in the game that I cannot defeat in level 5-3. Love to hate you, PvsZ.

Aaaand scene.
I feel better now.

Beginning to hate the boot.

2011-06-05T08:37:00.000-07:00

This weekend is Maifest. One of my favorite weekends of the year, and one of my favorite things to do.
I'm never so cute as when I'm pouring a beer.
Of course, this year, I'm not allowed to be at the fest.
Not that DANK didn't find other things for me to do.
All day sitting down inside things.
I thought I'd be happy to be inside, in the a/c, watching the fest from my seat.
Turns out it's not so awesome. Sure, I got to finish the book I was reading, and I did get to update teh fb with some witty tidbits to entice people to attend the fest, but other than that it just depressed me further, and I think delayed my recovery a bit. I've been in the boot all day every day, and not elevating.
I'm not getting up that often, I just think I'm putting in too many boot hours, when I'm working towards getting out of the boot all together.

I really don't want to turn VFN into a big schmoopy whiny thing, so I'll just stop right there. Here's hoping that I'll be boot free and into a much cooler, much easier to move around in ace bandage this week. Like, tomorrow even. I'm still going to be using one crutch, just to be safe, but the sooner I can shake the boot, the better.

So, let me live vicariously through you for now. Fill me in on your wild and crazy weekends.
Please.
Now.
No, really.....now.

As requested

2011-05-30T08:50:00.000-07:00

I received a lovely, funny, concerned email from a friend....requesting a post.

So, I'm alive. I worked from home last Tuesday - Friday, spending time resting, elevating, icing.

I saw two very cool Sports Medicine docs on Friday. They both let me know what a good job I did on my ankle, and then sent me to x-ray just to be sure.
Again, not broken.
Looks like I'll be in the boot and using a crutch for the next few weeks. I have some exercises I need to do to avoid physical therapy down the line. I'm trying. They aren't easy.

The swelling is down (finally!), but the bruising is up and gross. I'm moving around my house with either an ace bandage or nothing, carrying a crutch just in case. The pain is still there, but in different spots, and the movement is restricted.

VonSis did my laundry and made a couple of awesome meals for me this weekend. VonParents brought me some of my favorite snacks from Trader Joe's. Peapod sent me a superhot delivery man and all of my groceries.

I'm going back to work tomorrow. Work means definitely boot and one crutch.

So, I have nothing witty or awesome to say. I'm sure my friends are developing a "what now" attitude about me. I can't play guitar because of my hand still recovering. I can't go too many places. This is my fourth major health thing this year, and frankly I'm tired of it. I'm tired of pretending it doesn't bother me. I just keep knocking wood, and trying to right my karma, and praying for some calm healthy months.

Call me Bootsy

2011-05-25T14:06:00.000-07:00

Where has your lovely hostess been THIS week?
Well, you should have been able to guess this one -
I.Got.Hurt.

Sunday I did a major ankle roll and fell big time, tearing up my right hand in the process.
Could not stand up. Just laid on the ground, face down, swearing and crying.
It took quite a while to get me up off the ground and into a chair.
Luckily VonSis and VonBroInLaw were there, so was VonMom (another story for another day, and NOT a good one), so I wasn't alone.
They got me up into a chair, and I was convinced my ankle was broken. My hand was bleeding like a sonofabitch.
VonSis took me to urgent care for some xrays.
Good news! Not broken!
Bad news! Hand tore the fuck up to the point of needing tetanus shot!
Good news! Immobilizer boot and crutches!
Bad news! Can't stitch hand due to location of the gash!
Bad news! Good luck trying to use the crutches with your hand all tore up!!

Even worse? Living alone when you have an injury like this SUCKS. I'm pretty sure I'll be able to get groceries via Peapod, but no one has ponied up to do my laundry. I may have to bribe someone.

Went to work Monday. Let me just say - people suck. I had to take a train and a bus. And crutch a lot. By the time I got to work I was in tears, and purple with the exertion of it.
Thankfully, my team is letting me work from home the rest of the week. I'm working, but I'm also taking time to elevate/ice.

Sleeping? Not going well. Roll over, pain, wake up. Pretty much all night.

I have a follow up with a sports medicine doctor on Friday. Hoping for some good news. I have a lot coming up, and crutches and/or boot are NOT in my grand plan.

2011 and I are so totally NOT friends.

To clarify, for Brando

2011-05-20T10:22:00.000-07:00

Ah, my dear Brando, I feel I must clarify.*

You see, I am a baseball fan - a fan of all teams, all players, and all parks BUT WRIGLEY.

When I go to a baseball game, I want to watch the game, I want to score the game, I want to enjoy the game.
At Wrigley Field, you can do none of these things.
"Scoring the game" to those asshats means having sex at the game.
For a very very very long time, I was a die-hard Cubs fan. I mean, opening day 8 years in a row fan.
Then, I started paying attention, and realizing how much I hated the people who go to Cubs games.
Not to mention the fact that the last half dozen games I attended in that frat house shit hole I was mocked, taunted, made to feel like abosolute crap. By complete strangers, as I just walked by them. More than once, every time.
I did not know that Wrigley Field had a weight limit.

I will never, not if my life depended on it, not if they were doing well step foot in that place again.
It's not a ball park - it's the city's largest outdoor bar/frat house.

Now, the Cell?
Clean, beautiful, exciting (have you seen the opening montage?!?!), and WELCOMING.
Oh, yeah, and the people there go to watch baseball.

So, yes, this North-sider has switched teams, and proudly.
I'm all in, and I'm never going back.

The Cubs? Meh - but Fuck Wrigley Field.

*And I certainly hope we can agree to disagree, and be friends.
Let's have beer soon, just not in Wrigleyville.

Take me out to the ball game....

2011-05-18T11:31:00.000-07:00

The White Sox game, to be specific.

I don't step foot in Wrigley Field. Those people don't even know there's a baseball game going on. You couldn't pay me enough to go there.....guess it's another topic for another day.

And, we are pre-partying at the batting practice party thing.
There will be beer, oh yes, there will be beer.

And since this is Chicago....

I'm wearing:
A long sleeved shirt
A tee shirt
A Sox fleece
A hooded fleece lined jacket
Wool knee socks
Jeans

Chicago has skipped spring and summer and jumped right to fall.

Needless to say, I'll be off work and off line tomorrow, as I'm going with a bunch of bartenders who have warned me to not even bother trying to keep up.
I call this a challenge....

Brought to you by the letters T M and J

2011-05-16T11:04:00.000-07:00

So sorry for my recent absence.
I had one hell of a week last week, and for me to say that, that's pretty bad.

My aunt passed away on Monday, the very same aunt that I had written a post about last winter, and then deleted - that one.
I have piles and piles of regret, to the point that said regret was like an ugly living thing, sitting on my shoulders.
It's still there, but I'm giving it some thought daily, and working through it.

Then, Tuesday afternoon (coincidence? I think not...)
I began having massive ear/jaw/teeth pain on the left side of my face.
Like someone was stabbing me in the ear/jaw/teeth every 20 minutes or so.
Not fun.
I ignored said pain until Thursday, when LB1 made me go to the doctor.
I was convinced that it was an ear infection, or some sort of sinus thing.
I called the nurses at my doctor's office.
"So, I have an ear infection."
"Uh huh."
"Can she just call some drugs in to the Walgreens?"
"Let me call you back"
10 minutes later
"No. *ha ha* You will need to come in."
"Really?"
"Really. But she said you are probably right."
"Damn it."
"And then she will give you drugs, ok?"

So I head over to the doctor.
Ears, checked out awesome. Sinuses checked out not so bad.
"You have tmj!"*
"You're kidding!"
"Nope."
"Damn it!"
"And because you are you, you cannot have the good stuff prescription anti-inflammatory, so you will have to take some Advil. And Tylenol for the pain."
"Can I take four?"
"Or I can give you Vicodin."
As I was in the middle of one of the blindingly bad pain things, I said "Yes, yes, give me Vicodin."
"Pain scale?"
"Nine! GOD DAMN IT!"
And with that I was given Vicodin. Which I have not taken in over 20 years.
Got in the car, immediately called the dentist.
"I have to ask...are you using your mouth guard?"
"Sigh. Yes. Every night."
"Do you have painkillers?"
"Nope, but I will in about 20 minutes."
"Good. Take them. USE them."
My dentist knows me so well.

So I picked up a gigantic bottle of Advil, and a not small bottle of Vicodin, and headed over to VonParents' house.
"Why are you so early?"
"Well....."
"Oh, for Pete's sake - you CANNOT be sick again, and you CANNOT be around your dad if you are!!!!!"
"mumble mumble tmj......."
"What!?!? What is that?"
My dad chimes in "Well, it's like lock jaw...."
"This one?!?! Lock jaw?!?! That's not possible."
I had not taken any drugs yet, so this was just awesome.

Anywho.
Spent my weekend following the dentist's instructions perfectly - Advil every four hours, gargle with warm salt water, heating pad, soft foods, etc.....oh, and Vicodin.
And I can say I'm about 90% better. My ear and jaw are almost pain free, and my teeth and gums just hurt. I will need to call the dentist to let him know, and maybe schedule a follow up.

BUT
Don't think for a second that I sat my little ass at home, NO, we aren't doing that any more this year!!
Friday night - volunteered Marcia Ball / Sanctified Grumblers show at the OT.
Saturday - did miss guitar class due to pain, BUT went to book club followed by margarita (virgin for me) dance party.
Sunday - BBQ with delightful God-child. Ok, her dad cooked on the grill, and we all sat in the house in sweaters and jeans.

And, how are you??

*I will say I was THRILLED to find out I was NOT sick again. I mean, c'mon!

Best thing ever

2011-05-09T06:39:00.000-07:00

Friday night I went to Old Town to see my old guitar teacher play. I showed up a little drunk, because I also had some bad news to deliver to my friend Bob.
I found Bob sitting outside in the back courtyard. I told him the news, he seemed ok, but not thrilled.
Bob went inside, I decided to stay outside for a minute and relax.
This is when Steve showed up.
Steve was my second and most favorite guitar teacher. He's just the coolest guy I've met ever. He's also one fucking talented guitar player.
Steve refers to all people as either "musical humans" or "non-musical humans", and reminds us to feel bad for non-musical humans, as their lives are less rich than ours.
Steve is just this cool older hippie guy. Though I'm not sure he'd like it if I called him a hippie. I just respect the hell out of him. And I'm kinda in awe of him.
Anyway.
So, Steve, Juan and I were chatting in the courtyard on Friday night.
Steve asked about my classes, and I said that I was having some trouble in my current class. I told him I would not give up, that even though it was hard, I'd get through it and get better.
And then Steve said:
"You could never be a non-musical human. Not even for 15 minutes. It's just not possible."
Shortly thereafter, Steve headed one way, I headed inside to watch the show.
But I was all giddy.
For someone that barely knows me, he gets something about me that is a basic truth, and has been a basic truth of mine for as long as I can remember.

So, Saturday morning I was less anxious and more excited to go to guitar class. It was hard, and I got frustrated, I can admit that.
But I'm a musical human. And I do what musical humans do.

I revel in my contradictions

2011-05-05T11:47:00.000-07:00

Friday night, my friend K told me that the Big 4 is coming to Chicago.
If you don't know, it's Metallica, Anthrax, Megadeth, and Slayer
This may or may not be true (no date has been officially announced)
BuT
It got me to thinking.
One of the things I love, and have always loved, about going to metal shows is the hot men with the looooong hair.
Hot. Really hot.
I dig long hair. I always have, and likely, always will.

Then, I thought some more....
What kind of man turns my head on a regular basis?
Bald men.

Every day, I will nod and smile at hot bald men.
Hot. Really hot.

So, turns out I like:
Long haired men
Bald men

Could I be more inconsistent?

I looked back over my long and sordid romantic history.....
Turns out I have never dated either!
Sure, I've had some *special* times with some long-haired darlings, but VonMom pretty much would have hated and possibly killed any long haired, leather jacketed dude I might have brought home for a meet and greet.
And the bald bandits of my heart?
Haven't even kissed one.

Looks like I found my plan for summer 2011.
Everyone needs a plan.

Review

2011-05-03T10:22:00.000-07:00

I had one of those weekend that not only tired me out, but it bled my wallet dry.
Drier than dry.
I think I saw a piece of lint in there today, but I also heard an echo.
But I'm not complaining (much).

Friday night I volunteered a show at Old Town. I'm a little bummed to know that when I volunteer now, it's for nothing, really nothing, as I'll be losing my points (I have over 400 points) as soon as my new jobby job starts. I don't really mind, there are benefits to being staff beside getting paid, but it's still weird. I thought maybe I should just not sign in, but then the volunteer coordinator will not know that I was there.....so anyway.
Right before the show began, I got a text from Eldest Stepsib that she and her fam were at my bar, down the block.
I snuck out, said hello to the fam, stole a piece of nephew's pizza, and hied back to the show.
It was a later night than I'd have liked, for a Friday, but that's ok.

Saturday morning brought the new stress of the new guitar class. Not only am I repeating 2rep (again, again, I know) but this time around I have a very scary teacher. Scary to me. Intimidating. Whatever. He's tough. AND his teaching method is entirely different from any other I've had so far. Sigh. He took away our music stands (my crutch) and did NOT give us the sheet with the words and the chords! He didn't even tell us what song it was. Just taught us some arpeggio business, then some bass line stuff, then "chunklets" of the song. For the life of me I could not figure out what the song was. To my credit, I did know that it was a melancholy sound, and I was curious. Only in the last 5 minutes of class did he start singing, and it was "Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen. I would have never guessed, and I have this song on my iPod!!! His teaching style is going to be very tough to get used to.

Saturday night I went to dinner with John and Toni. We went to an amazing Peruvian restaurant near their house in the Wicker Park area. It was warm enough and close enough to walk. I love eating out with John and Toni because they love to eat, try new places, and have a great meal be the entire evening. Sure, it was more $$ than I expected, but I was more than full, and the food was great, so it was worth it. Plus, they are so great to hang out with. They hate people as much as I do, so it's kinda perfect.

Sunday was breakfast with TheMarty at Tweet. I would call it brunch, except that at 9:00 am, that's breakfast. There are very very very few people I'd set my alarm for on a Sunday, and TheMarty is one of them. We had a lovely time.

I also ran to my new favorite place on Sunday - Trader Joe's. What had I been missing!! It was only my second time there, and I'm obsessed.

Much running around, not enough resting time, but these things happen.

Done

2011-04-27T12:46:00.000-07:00

Did your heart just skip a beat?
No worries, the title does not mean what you think it means.
This here lil ole blog is not done.

What it actually means is I am finished with the word d o n e

It's not something I consciously realized, at first.
But after a while, I started to notice that I really do NOT like the word done and I've been replacing it whenever possible.
Without sounding pretentious.

I think my 6th grade teacher had a little something to do with it. Sure, I can't remember what I did yesterday, but I can specifically remember something he said in English class one day.
Ah, Mr. Ronsevall. Terrifying in every way. Tall, scarily red-faced, short tempered and from Little Rock Arkansas.
One day, Mr. R said "Billy? Have you finished?"
Billy said "Yes, I'm done."
Mr. R became even more red-faced and yelled: "DONE?!? Turkeys are DONE, son, PEOPLE ARE FINISHED!"

And I remembered it.
And I lived by it, and I taught it to others. I have friends who to this day repeat that back to me.

Now, all of these years later, I'm eradicating that word ~~done~~ from my vocabulary. I think "finished" sounds polished. I use "finished" a lot at work.
Also, ended. Completed, even.

Now, to train myself not to cringe when other people use the word.

Other shoe?

2011-04-25T08:38:00.000-07:00

Again, I had a fantastic weekend.
Leaves me waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Friday night I was working a show at Old Town, which you all know is my happy place. Well, now it's my VERY happy place.
I've been offered (and have accepted) a house manager position! I've been waiting and wishing and hoping and praying for this for a loooong time. I thought my best shot would be when they open the new building in January 2012. I've mentioned (and mentioned and mentioned again) that I would love to be a house manager.
And, as of August of this year, I will be one!
I'll be saying goodbye to my volunteer shifts/points etc....and will be an actual member of the Old Town Staff. I was so excited that I couldn't fall asleep Friday night.
This is a part time weekend/evening thing, so this will be in addition to my full time real life jobby job.

Saturday morning I was out running errands when LB1 called. She asked me if I had time to run by her house.
Um...?
She had been in WI last week, and had remembered that I didn't buy myself enough New Glarus beer, so she bought me a case of Spotted Cow.
Oh, did I make time to go over and pick that up!!!
So awesome. And of course, when I offered to pay for it, she would have none of it. She really does spoil me. I'm very lucky.

Sunday being Easter was family day. While I do not attend Mass, I do believe in Easter and what it stands for, and I do love the chance to spend time with people I care about.
While the people were at Mass, I cranked up some Dropkick Murphy's and baked some Pillsbury rolls and such.
I headed upstairs to brunch the second everyone got back - my timing is amazing.
Sadly, VonDad was home sick and didn't come to brunch. VonMom said he has a cold, but VonSis said he was really sick. Love the downplaying, VonMom. I dressed all cute in a new dress, fixed my hair, put on makeup.......and wore white tennis shoes. That was specifically to piss off VonMom. Can't give too much, you know.
I stayed upstairs until 4:00, I felt that was long enough for brunch.

I have had not one but two bagels. Ah, so glad Lent is over!!

What happens in New Glarus......

2011-04-20T12:01:00.000-07:00

........Unfortunately had to STAY in New Glarus.
Yes, there was that much debauchery.

I think I can give you some highlights though:

Two nights in a row of cheese fondue.
YES

A fuck ton (sorry, no other way to describe it, really) of New Glarus beer was consumed. Yes, of course there was Spotted Cow, but there was also: Totally Naked, Belgian Red, Smoked Rye (YUCK!), Two Women, Fat Squirrel, Snow Shoe, and my new favorite: Cabin Fever.

Alas, I didn't bring nearly enough beer home for myself. I have three bottles of Cabin Fever, and one giant bottle of Belgian Red left, and that's it. I might have to hit up Shannon and TheMarty for some of their stash.

I do, however, have three NICE bottles of wine from the Primrose Winery.

I wanted to dance with a Vietnam Vet. I almost had my chance, but I had to pee. Really really badly.

The men-folk in New Glarus are adorable and flirty and friendly. I totally could have gotten me some, if I didn't have a room mate, and if I had been more devil-may-care with the whole stranger sex thing.

My room totally had a sitting area, which made it the party room. It would have been the party room without the sitting area. Yes, I am that much fun on vacation.

Favorite part: Commandeering the jukebox at Sportman's Bar. And getting the entire bar to air drum Phil Collins. Yes, we did.

My hair was the curliest/cutest/dare-I-say sexiest it's ever been. The snow and wind totally helped. NO, I do not have a picture to prove this!! Drunk people don't take awesome pictures.

I didn't kill anyone.
Though a few people did deserve it, by Sunday morning, totally.
I showed restraint.

I fell in even more love with my Boston people. Primarily the two that came along to WI.

I named Scott the brewer (squee!! An actual New Glarus brewer!!) "Shiny Pipes Scott". Sure, you think it's dirty, 'cuz that's what you do. This is his name because he said to me "I don't work on the big copper pots, I work on the other ones. The shiny pipes." And he loves his new nickname.

I harassed the only non-gift shop employee at the brewery until he came out to talk to me. A) Wisconsin people are so dang NICE B) He knew it was futile to ignore me. I followed him around the brewery C) Not my fault the walls of glass have little spaces between them, in which I could ~~yell~~ speak loudly at him, until he came to talk to me. He was a lab-rat, who spends his time checking fermentation processes. And no, he doesn't get to drink all day. I am sad for him, and recommended he move to Boston and go work for those Sam Adams people.

I did not go to the sausage store, nor did I give two shits about taking pictures of the fiberglass cows all over town.

But, if you ask VonMom what she heard about my vacation, she will tell you that I rested plenty, read lots of books, dressed warmly and went to bed early.

I know, right?!?!?!

2011-04-14T11:07:00.000-07:00

Three posts in one week!!
I can't believe it either!

I'm going on a little weekend trip with the other two parts of the Tricycle of Awesome, a couple of my favorite Boston people, and a gaggle of other people I don't really know.
Could be interesting.
I'm just hoping it'll be fun.

I know, I know... pictures or it didn't happen. My camera is charging as I write this. Now, I just have to remember to pack it.

Where are we going?
Thanks for asking!
We're heading up to New Glarus Wisconsin to DRINK.SOME.BEER.
and
Drink.some.wine.
and
Eat.fondue.
and
Maybe polka.
and after that
Drink.More.Beer.

Quick trip - leaving tomorrow, back on Sunday.
I hope I remember enought amusing details to relay them back to you.

See you on the flip side.

Best.Movie.Ever.

2011-04-13T09:36:00.000-07:00

Last night I finally watched Pirate Radio.
I think the only reason I put it off for so long was the fact that I'm not always the biggest Phillip Seymour Hoffman fan.
Like, he's a great actor - GREAT actor, but I don't see how he's sexay or anything. Sometimes, they want him to come off as sexay and I get skeeved out.

BUT

Pirate Radio was awesome!!
Without a doubt, one of my top five favorite movies of all time. I'll say it again, OF.ALL.TIME.
And the soundtrack. Good God. That's one of the best soundtracks I've heard in years and years.
And the song placement!
I could go on and on.
But the part that gave me chills?
When he played this song:

Definitely one of my favorite songs of all time.
Do I sound like a broken record?
I'm ok with being THAT broken record.

*yes, I'm aware I posted a video. Shadup.

So, this book I just read

2011-04-12T10:37:00.000-07:00

So, I read this book over last week, called "Feed" by Mira Grant.
TheMarty insisted that I read it ASAP, so I did.
Plus, I had me a lot of time to read, during my most recent quarentine.
The book? Well, it was pretty good.

But that's not what I wanted ot discuss.

So, the book is about post-zombiacolypse living.
The news, the entertainment, all of it comes from bloggers.
Blogging, actually, is one of the main characters of the book.

So I got to thinking.
If I take my blog-roll and apply it to the premise of the book, would I be alright?
Never for one second did I put myself in the leading lady roll, that's just not me.
But my blog roll?
Would they become my people for realz? My network? My internet family?

Well, my recent bout of illnesses has proved that they already are these things.
They are my people, my network, my ifamily, and my friends.

So, yeah. I think it's a safe bet for us getting through the Zombipocalypse together.
Especially since one of us already IS a member of the undead.

FRIDGE NOTE~!! IMPORTANT!! RED FLAG!!

2011-04-11T09:35:00.000-07:00

If someone can please instruct me how to get this stupidassed blogger bull shit to post my posts the way I want them to look, and not like one big stupid fucking paragraph, that would be awesome. WTF Never had this problem before, now my last few posts read horribly!!! WTF!!!! Someone, please, help me quick before I totally lose iT!!!!! Thanks!

Good News on the Von Front

2011-04-11T09:27:00.000-07:00

Back, huh, stronger than ever You think I'd sever? Never I'm too clever To be taken on down by your ignorant state of mind..... OK That's enough of that!! It's a rap by a group that I am far far too embarrassed to mention. Please, please remember my musical tastes are eclectic, and I once was a teen aged girl. So, how are you? Oh, me? Good. About 95% better, I'd say. Docs gave me a cleanish bill of health. Well, not so much. But they did cancel my chest x-ray at my follow up on Thursday since they both thought my lungs were clear. Finished with my antibiotics. Now on a nasal spray steroid so I don't blow out my ear drums. Good times, the good times never stop!! But, they did green light my vacation to the lovely and breweryish town of New Glarus this coming weekend. That's all I was hoping for really. So, back to work, back to blogging, back to all of it..... Back to life

back to reality

Back to the here and now.....

No fun

2011-04-01T06:52:00.000-07:00

Where have I been, you ask? Well Your hostess with the mostess has gone and gotten sick again. As in. Pneumonia sick. Awesome. I couldn't be more upset about being sick again so soon, missing so much work, being stuck at home. Coughing up a lung every few minutes is less than awesome. Chapped lips that bleed and make me look leperous, not cool. I'm stuck at home until Tuesday. So, I've got nothing.

Fun at the Dentist

2011-03-28T09:29:00.000-07:00

Oh, but I wish I was kidding. So, I had to get a mouth guard. Because, you see, I clench my teeth at night, thus causing some damage. Who, me? Clenching my teeth, much like my fists, even while I sleep? Anyway. Went to the dentist to pick up my new $175 piece of plastic. We spent some time practicing the art of shoving in the thing and yanking it off. shoving and yanking, shoving and yanking, yep - insert dirty joke here..... Dentist: Do you have a dog? **giggle from Basia, dental assistant** Me: No. Well, not right now, I want one, so I think we'll get one soon but..... -thinking we're making conversation or something- D: Do NOT get a dog within the next month! -as he's holding my expensive piece of plastic up in the air - M: ? **giggles from Basia** D: Basia? What number mouth guard are you on? B: Number three!! Don't throw them in the washing machine.... D: No dogs! B: No dogs! D: So. Over the next month or so, you will wake up in the middle of the night, yank this thing out and throw it all over the place. The floor, the closet, behind the bed, under the night stand, trust me. You WILL wake up and throw it around. Dogs like to eat them when they find them lying around. Me: *Scoff* That's not going to happen to me! Look how hard it is to yank out! D: Uh huh - sure Von. Go, be free. Let me know how it goes. I leave. I scoff. I go to bed that night. Mouth guard very snugly in place. I wake up about 5:30 am, head to the bathroom. Sleepy. On my way back to bed, I realize that it's not in my face! Ah!! Get back to my room, see costlyplastic thing on my nightstand. Sometime during the night, I took yanked it out, and placed it lovingly on my nightstand. No clue. No recollection. None whatsoever. I'm on night four of this stupid thing. Lasted until 3am with it last night. **Fucking side note: This fucking post does not read right, because fucking blogger keeps changing how I want it to read!! So, fuck you blogger, thanks for fucking up my post. Sorry, reader(s), that it reads really shittily, but blogger thinks this is how it should read. fucking fuck fuck***

An easy one, I think

2011-03-25T08:07:00.000-07:00

So, it's Friday. Time for a little fun. Name one song that no matter where you are, no matter what kind of mood you are in, what you are thinking about, it all goes away when you hear it? It brings you immediately to a place, an event, a season, a person? Backstory will earn you a delightful kiss on the cheek from your hostess. Just had one of these (thanks to the iPod currently being on shuffle). The song came on and I started grinning and teared up a little, and sang along in my head. Today, for me, that song was "I can't stop loving you" from the Balance album by Van Halen (or, if you are so inclined, Van Hagar). Happy Friday, my merry minions. Go out and do something awesome this weekend.

Fun with words

2011-03-23T09:17:00.001-07:00

When VonMom and I are getting along, I can fully admit, she is FUNNY. Sure, it's a little oddball funny, but funny nonetheless. I know VonSis and I wit-spar, improving our own brand of funny, but the genesis is truly my mother. A text exchange between VonMom and VonSis. VM: Knut is dead VS: Yes, we were kinda keeping that from you VM: You buy me tshirts with dead things on them, and expect me to wear them. VS: I will buy you a tshirt with X and Y (two people that are the bane of VonSis' and kinda my existance) on it. VM: I like the way you think. Evil. Her humor is evil. A text I received from VonMom, yesterday: I got a new Cooling light! Yay! I call her on the phone, after 20 minutes of trying to figure out what a cooling light is. Something for her indoor plants? Some sort of kitchen appliance? A fridge bulb replacement? I had no clue. VM: What? V: Um, so yeah, what is a Cooling light? VM: ? V: cooling light, as in your text, I got a new cooling light today yay!? VM: hahahahahahahaaaaa I'm so funny! hahahahahaaaaa V:? VM: Cooking Light! The magazine! I got a new one today. V: Oh. *chuckle* VM: hahahahahaaa V: ha ha ha ha ...... VM: Ok bye. Also, being the children of an English-as-a-second-language, things come out that we cannot pronounce. I have always known mine: The words: Bull, bowl, pull, pole hurt me to say. Like physical pain in the back of my throat. So I just do not say them. Ever. I know my limits. VonSis is a little different. Her unsayables keep popping up like spring flowers - something new all the time. Her first (and best) is Sonoma - as in Williams Sonoma. So NO ma. Or, as VonSis says, sinimaaa. I like to buy her things from there and then ask where I got it. Good fun for me. This weekend, I told VonSis that I had learned the tab/bass line to "Sugar Pie Honey Bunch". She said "Oh, so you are a real muzzishhhhhan." I stared. VonSis cannot pronounce Musician. At all. She tried and tried again. Not to happen. Her brain has also decided that Knut (may his cute little polar butt rest in animal heaven) is a panda bear. Why, yes, I do find random shit like this funny. I do I do I do. Now, put the bull in a bowl and shove that pole up the........

Hazy and blurry

2011-03-21T09:44:00.000-07:00

I'd love to tell you all about my weekend, but it's a little fuzzy. Been on a bender. Which I've renamed to a tear. I like tear better. So, I'm on a tear. No end in sight, either. I kinda like this current tear, I've been pretty f-ing funny. Or so I seem to recall. I can tell you I: - was asked if I made out with M (by M himself) on Friday night. He then said "Because it could happen". - then turned the brightest shade of red I've been in a long time. I have a big crush on M. - drank: Blue Moon, Guiness, Harp, Harp Shandy, Green Line (by Goose Island SO GOOD), Jameson, BBK, Bell's something yummy, some other shot, Guiness Black Lager and some other stuff* - was instructed not to return to work until I made out with someone. I returned to work today, but did not make out with someone. Alas. - invited myself to a wedding. Totally going. April 2nd. I could use a date, but that would probably be even more tacky than inviting myself in the first place. - have been hung-over every day since Thursday. - believe that the hair 'o the dog is the best remedy. - found out there is a lesbian karaoke bar practically across the street from DANK. - didn't go to said lesbian karaoke bar, it was already 2am when it was discussed. - spent too much $$ on comic trades this weekend. - can admit I was not 100% sober when I went to the comic book store. - made up my new band name, with the help of VonSis - Musical Panda. - went to guitar class with a hangover. - learned Little Lion Man at class (kinda not really) and relished getting to sing the word "fucked". - cried like a little girl when I found out Knut had died. - blamed my hang over for the stupid crying. - did say to myself at some point "This is good shit for the blog on Monday!" *When I go on a Tear, I go ON A TEAR

Sorry cats and kitten, so super busy.

2011-03-16T12:13:00.000-07:00

So, life is crazy busy, and not in very many good ways. I give you this video, by my number one band to see live.

Nerdy McNerdinstein

2011-03-14T10:37:00.000-07:00

I had been invited by one of my fave friends to an event Saturday night. I kept it on my radar, because it did sound like fun, but I didn't 100% commit until Saturday itself. So, I went. To Dark Tower comics, for an event put on by my friend's group, Comic Book Queers. So, me and a bunch of gay men, one other straight gal (or hag, whatevs) chatted, drank, snacked and talked comics. I know nothing letmerepeat NOTHING about comics. I was there to support my pal, SR. But this group was so super fun and into comics and knowledgeable, I couldn't help but get excited. I talked to the workerbee of the store a lot about what I like to read. He got all animated and walked me all around the store. I found myself taking out my notebook from my purse and...... writing down titles For future reference. Two "trades" were thrust into my hands with very strong urges to look them over. One trade was delivered unto me for winning round 2 of Comic Book Squeers. Ok ok ok ok ok So, I left there with three trades - The Unwritten, Sweet Tooth, Doom Patrol, and a plump list of other things to buy in the future: Buffy the Vampire Slayer IZombie* Locke and Key (by one son of one Stephen King) Pax Romana and The Walking Dead (of course) Got home, settled in, doing some laundry. And I pick up The Unwritten. And I devour it. And I crave trade 2. Ah, hell, this could get expensive. So, as I see some of my cool points flying out the window, I fully admit to jumping on the colorful, sexy, dirty and slightly bent world of comic books. *yes, my favorite Zombie, I sought out something awesome and undead and thought of you!

Friday fuuuuuuuucc um, fun day....

2011-03-11T10:51:00.000-08:00

So, I'm crabby today. And a really silly thing started it all. See, in our work fridge (one of like four on the floor, by the way), I always put my lean cuisines in the same place. Same place for nearly two years now, same stupid place. I keep mine in the door of the freezer. Just like I keep my other stuff in the door of the fridge, on the top shelf thingy. So, this morning. I come in, go to put my frozen lunch in it's place. I had gone out to lunch yesterday, so the last frozen I had was on Wednesday. I knew I had to replenish my stock, but hey, it's Friday, so I just brought one. AND THE WHOLE DOOR WAS FULL of someone else's frozen dinners. Um, what? One day and you take over "my" space? And I know how these other people are. They bring in a bunch of frozen stuff and then never eat it. It sits there for three or four months. So I just whipped my frozen meal at the back of the freezer. I was pissed. So long story behind today's question: What seemingly little thing, behavior of others, etc just gets your blood to boiling?

40 days is a loooong time

2011-03-09T06:51:00.000-08:00

Because I am someone's God-mother, I sometimes have to do things I would normally not do. Like go to church (ok, I've successfully avoided that for the 11 years of precious God-daughter's life, but I know it's coming). And answer questions about Catholicism (haha!! I bite my tongue a lot). And follow Lent. (for the most part). So That means as of today, I've given up the following for 40 days. Bagels (which I eat EVERY DAY) Burgers (don't eat those that often, but still) and Bad-mouthing strangers AND I'm not one of those Catholics who believe you get Sundays off, or that you can have what you've given up on Holy Thursday. This is on until the Monday after Easter. Ok, I'll likely get a bagel on Easter Sunday while the family is at church, but that's still up in the air. Like I said, it's going to be a looooong 40 days. And you thought I was cranky before.

In too deep

2011-03-07T11:33:00.000-08:00

Dear Phil, You know I love you, but I just can't take this. Because You can't hurry love, you just have to wait. And Just say the word...oh....sususudieo Because Tonight, tonight tonight, wooohooo And I can't stoooop loving you.....no I won't stop loving you.... Even though you're f-ing retiring. I mean, aren't there supposed to be two hearts, living in just one mind? Against all Odds, Von

FrIdAy!!!

2011-03-04T06:39:00.000-08:00

What time is it? Friday Funday TIME!!!!! Here's your query: You're stuck on a desert island. You can have ONE blogger there with you. Who?* and WHY? I'm still thinking about my answer....... *and it does not have to be me.....

Some clarification

2011-03-02T09:40:00.000-08:00

Nope, it's not a political post, but more about how ignorant people post incorrect info on teh fb in their vitriolic rants. So. I feel the need to clarify. 1. Mayon Daley is STILL MAYOR until May 15. This means Rahm Emanuel takes office MAY 16. As in RAHM EMANUEL IS NOT YET MAYOR. Which means: When you write 'Why isn't Mayor Emanuel visiting the injured cop in the hospital?!?!? Asshole!!!! Doesn't care about the city or the police!!!' UM - Why would he? As he is quoted as saying: He's not going to park his car in front of Daley's. So, who should be visiting the cop who's in the hospital? DALEY. 2. Jody Weis had a CONTRACT as Chicago Police Superintendent that expired yesterday, 3/1/11. Which means that his job was actually completed and over and finished and ended on 3/1/11. When you write: 'Man! Look at Weis! He doesn't even have to give two weeks notice! Asshole!!!! Doesn't care about the city or the police!!!' Um, you are also an ignorant asshole. Lemme 'splain - a contract has a start date and an end date, which means that is the date that he is finished with the responsibilities of said contract. And guess what? We HAVE an interim Superintendent - Terry Hilliard, former Superintendent, called by da Mayor and asked to fill in for the two months until Mayor Emanuel puts someone else in the top cop slot. And from what I remember (and this will get all the feisty cop people all up my ass, but whatever) Hilliard was well liked and did a good job. So, nothing to bitch about!!! Nothing to see here people!! Moving on!!!! Also stuck in my craw this week: People who get off on being the first with new information. For the record - Yes, I did love @mayoremanuel on Twitter. It was awesome and hilarious and creative and all that good stuff. No, I do not care who wrote it. I would have been perfectly fine never knowing who did. But hey! Now we do! ANNNNDDD I still do not care. I don't a) live in Evanston b) go to Columbia c) give two shits who he is ***notice, I'm not even going to bother naming him here*** The only good part about knowing who he is is that the allegedly assholey, uncaring, callous, Mayor-elect, the actual Rahm Emanuel is still going to *gasp* keep his promise of donating $5,000 to the tweeter's charity of choice.

LAME

2011-02-28T08:45:00.001-08:00

I wish I could give you a delightful recap of my weekend. I will try: Friday evening was ten shades of awesome, as I spent it at Jennifer's house. I tried to smuggle out Squirmy Dog and YL (who is also squirmy), but that didn't turn out so well. I did manage to leave with a copy of "Icebergs" by one TLB, so that was cool. We had a lovely time hanging out, chatting and being snarky. I think Jennifer only hit me two or three times with throw pillows, and I know Grizzled nearly spit beer twice. (He's catching on to me). Saturday was guitar class/graduation. VonParents came to see me graduate (aka play on the big stage). We played "Hide your love away". Not my first choice, but I was actually happy with how we did. Ok, with how I did. VonDad did say that I'm getting better. No discussion as to the ownership of his guitar (that I've had in my possesion for over a year now), but that will come in due time I guess. After graduation, I had lunch with VonParents at DBAG, my favorite Bar and Grille. Both our server and bartender are friends of mine, so it was a great experience for my parents. They really like it there, and they don't eat out that much, so I was happy they had a nice time. Post lunch I had to go to a wake. Thankfully as I was getting out of my car I ran into my OTSFM co-worker. We headed in together. My friend/boss (who's father's wake it was) cried because I had shown up. That made me tear up a little. I'm a sucker for tears. Spent some time there, then finally headed home. It was a loooonnnngggg day for me. Cancelled my Saturday night plans, and had zero plans on Sunday. I blame winter and h1n1. I have zero interest in leaving the house until a) It's not snowing b) There's no chance it's going to snow or icestorm c) I don't have to wear 18 layers of clothes. Sorry, but I'm a winter wimp, and I've had enough. My couch/books/ds are all the company I need until spring. Though, I'm having a huge hankering for some Olive Garden. That I would leave the house for in a blizzard. Did watch the Oscar's, kinda. I wasn't really interested, so I had it on while I read the latest book club book. Went to bed early, had to get up for work today. Why, yes, I am a wet noodle lately. Thanks for noticing.

Friday Funday

2011-02-25T09:41:00.001-08:00

Baseball predictions: Go: And yes, this is totally going to be used to make my fantasy team WINNERS. P.S. I'm going to hang out with Jennifer, Grizzled, EL and YL tonight. So so so excited. Guessing you might be so so so jealous. * and yes, you will likely be discussed*

Ha has from the hospital

2011-02-23T08:33:00.000-08:00

A few times last week, while in the hospital, certain things were said or done and I thought to myself - Damn, that would make some good blog fodder. So, here's what I can remember: In the ER: ER Nurse: Is there any chance you are pregnant? Me: Nooooo. -she walks away and quickly comes back- ER Nurse: Are you not pregnant because of any surgery or condition that prevents pregnancy? Me: *sigh* No. I just haven't gotten any in about a year. ER Nurse walks away, quickly, but didn't get far enough before she busted out in laughter. I think I made her night. Day 1: Indian Med student asks many many questions. He walks away, remembers to ask something, comes back...... IMS: Do you have any other STDs? Me: Nooooo IMS: Ok and turns to leave Me: Excuse me? IMS: ? Me: You should be careful how you word things..... IMS: ? Me: Well, you said any other STDs. This indicates that I have a STD, which I do NOT have. IMS: Sorry, my English is not so good. Me: Well, for future reference..... IMS: Thank you. I will remember that. I'll bet he will. *ring ring* Lady: Food service? Me: I'd like some food? Lady: Of course! What do you want? Me: x y z..... Lady: Don't you want some dessert? Our ice cream is very good! Me: Oh, and some chocolate ice cream! **I then realized I kinda liked this part of the stay** The missing Gibb brother was my Transport dude. Not once, not twice, but three times. I wanted to ask him about his delightful hair style and very 70s clothes each time, but I realized my very sick self was in his hands. He could have totally dumped me on the floor at any point. So I left it alone. But I swear, he was the missing Gibb. My NCT (nursing care tech) was TOTALLY hitting on me. Though married, he dug me. And my h1n1 self. He was chatting with me while I was waiting to get the final heave-ho. He came over, gave me a half-hearted kinda awkward hug, and said "Maybe I'll see you at Walmart some time." Um....Walmart? Not likely. I'm a classy, refined Target kind of girl, mister.