This little piggy went to the market

What Your Feet Say About You:

You are pretty average in your expressiveness. You can express yourself well, but you don't always want to. You are a somewhat passionate person. A few things get you very fired up, but you're usually pretty laid back. You are an assertive person at times. You'll pull out all the stops to get what you want, if it's worth it. You take a while to fall in love, but once you do, you stay pretty attached to your partner. You are not afraid of anything. You are brave and courageous, even when most people would be terrified. You are very practical and down to earth. You're more concerned with action than thoughts. You are an amazingly hard worker. You aren't spoiled and you don't mind getting your hands dirty. You are easily influenced by other people. You're quite impressionable, so you should only be around people who are a good influence.

What Do Your Feet Say About You?

First off, thanks to Saying Yes for this fun little distraction.
Secondly, let me tell you the reality of my feet. Just a year or two ago I decided that I love my feet. For 30+ years I absolutely hated them. I hate shoes, I hate socks, and I hated my feet. Now, I love them with a deep seated l o v e.
I have the fattest, pinkest, funniest feet in the world. All summer long, I will show my feet to people and say "Look at them! Aren't they fantastic! I love my fat little feet!" See, I just love them. They are so unique, and fat and puffy and cute I can't stand it. I spend lots of money (ok, piss away lots of money) on pedicures just so I can show off my Fatty McFeetersens. The pictures are above. I know. You totally love them too, don't you?

Quick FYI

I won't be a part of our Block Party this summer. I've had a much better offer that I am really looking forward to.

Money, Life, and my Dad's sage advice on the two

More than a few years ago, my dad and I had a conversation that has stuck with me to this day. The gist of it was two important points he wanted me to remember and stick to. 1. Don't piss your money away. Well, I'm still working on that one. I've made pissing my money away practically an art form, to which I'm sure my dad shakes his head at quite often. 2. Don't piss your life away. Much more recently, my dad said to me "Von, I think you've taken that pissing your life away thing a little too far." I think I know what he means. When he made the original statements, I was in high school, being busy like high schoolers are. I was in clubs, and groups, and organizations. I went to clubs. I was rarely home. I'm *ahem* a little bit older now, but am still incredibly busy not pissing my life away. My dad chuckles when I give hime a run down of what I'm up to. Here's a quick look at what I have going on right now, or will have going on this summer: German Class Administrator to Adult German School Bodhran Class Go-go dancing Class Volunteering at Old Town School of Folk Music Trying to meet up with the cacophonists and shake things up a bit Guitar lessons Kayak lessons Joining the Chicago Kayak Club Photography Classes Bartending Chicago Festivals (I'm on board for 2 this summer, come see me!) Bartending private events Learning to crochet Oh, yeah, and my newest passion - Blogging. (Dad doesn't know about this yet) I wonder why he thinks I went a little overboard with his suggestion? There is a downside to being so busy, I may write about that some other time.

Random Friday

Just throwing out some random thoughts for a Friday. Last night was awesome. Sister-in-law-once-removed (hereafter referred to as Sil1x) came over. Sil1x is awesome. She came over to help me decide between two dresses I bought for a couple of weddings I'm going to this year. The dress trying on and evaluating part took about seven minutes. Sil1x hung out with me for a little more than an hour and a half. We were chatting, snacking (Sil1x loves me the most for my extensive supply of snacks, she just shops the kitchen.), watching the first part of Grey's. She voiced her opinion on the dresses, and I agree with her recommendation. I need one more opinion before I send back the dress I like least. I love that Sil1x lives about 3 minutes away on foot. Tonight I am going to have dinner at my parents'. My mom has this thing. Whenever she gets an idea in her head, it has to be executed NOW if not sooner. Mom decided she wants new Crocs. I bought her a pair last year and suggested she wear them when she's gardening and such. Mom LOVES her Crocs. She loves them so much she kinda wore them out. I don't understand why she can't go buy them herself, but she's insistant that I go with her. I said Okey dokey, whenev, hoping it would die off. Nope. She called and called again until I agreed to go with her tonight after work. I might get a new pair out of it. I'm thinking flip-flops. But still, not how I was wanting to spend my Friday night. I am down on internet dating. I haven't tried Match.com or Eharmony or anything decent yet, but the cheaper smaller sites suck. I hate the false sense of bravado otherwise nerdy dudes get when hiding behind the keyboard. I think I am not venturing down this road again, and taking a break entirely again. Stupid men suck. If anyone has any suggestions on meeting non-stupid non-sucky men, I'm all ears. I've walked to work from the train station twice this week. It's been difficult, and I've gotten these terrible pains in my shin. I looked up a walking website or two and they recommended stretches to help work my shins, and advised to dial down the walk. This walk is a little better than a mile. It's a nice walk, and good exercise. Of course, next week it's going to be about 30 degrees in the mornings, so I'm undecided about the walking. I refuse to walk back after work, because when it's time to go home, it's just time to go. That's all for now. Perhaps I'll have something witty to say later.

Phoning it in

So, I'm a little bummed today for reasons I chose to keep to myself at this time, so I'm totally phoning it in today. Today is Administrative Assistants' Day. I am (kinda) an admin. assistant. On Monday I had to lead our team conference call meeting, and the following is what I started out the meeting with. (My co-workers think I'm funny.) Top 10 ways to keep your coordinator happy (a happy employee is a productive employee) 1. Do not go all Devil wears Prada and throw your coat on your coordinators desk. You might now be called DWP and your coat may end up on the floor smelling oddly like my skinny mocha latte. 2. Remember there are 2 shopping days left before admin assts' day. Wed. is admin asst day. This is a real holiday, it exists. Google it if you don't believe me. 3. Your admin likes fresh air and sunlight. Take her outside occasionally. 4. There are 9 months and 27 days until S's birthday and 7 months and 6 days until Von's birthday. 5. We're girls. We like manicures, pedicures, and free lunches. 6. Know things about your coordinator. Von is a die hard Cubs fan. S is a Yankees fan. 7. If you go to a sales call anywhere near a bakery or coffee shop, stop and shop. Treats are always appreciated. 8. Your coordinator is brilliant and funny - laugh at her jokes. Laugh now. 9. If you catch your coordinator singing at her desk, tell her that her voice is lovely, and you are so glad she works with you instead of being on and winning American Idol. This is the moment to NOT laugh. 10. Realize and acknowledge that while your coordinator may lack in certain skills *ahem* PowerPoint, they are probably extraordinary at something else, for example Excel.

Bleh

It was one of those weekends. The kind that are so bad that you are glad to get back to work. Here's a sampling of the suckage: I had a surprise visit to the mechanic Saturday morning that cost me $600 and 3 hours of my life. I then went to the salon to get re-blonded, and get my eyebrows cleaned up. Now, this is not the first time I've had my eyebrows done (please refer to my myspace blog). But, I was assured that this was "super special low heat very special wax for very sensitive skin." Mm-hm. More on that in a bit. Saturday night I worked a show at Old Town, and I got my parents tickets to the show. Well, for the first time in my 3 years of volunteering there, a lady collapsed in the middle of the show. Thankfully there were many doctors in the house. When the paramedics arrived it took a little while for them to get her stable enough to take her out of the concert hall, so Kathy Mattea had us all singing Kumbaya (I am so not kidding) to fill the time. I doubt my parents will EVER go back there. Then, as they were leaving my mom (tactful that she is) pulled me aside and said "Honey, are you planning on going out tonight?" I said "Yes, John's band is playing down the street." She said "Yeah, maybe you're not going." I said "Why?" She said just go to the bathroom and look." Well, my stupid fucking eyebrows got all Frankenstein on me AGAIN. So, the super special stuff only took longer to Ruin My Face. Sunday also sucked, except for the Rock of Love 2 Reunion show. That rocked. I totally see a Rock of Love 3 in my future. Oh, my mom called Sunday morning to tell me she had the perfect solution to my eyebrow/face problem: "Hi Von. It's your mother. I have a great idea! Let's go to Great Clips and get you some bangs!" "Um, what?!" "Yes, you know bangs." "Um, why? I haven't had bangs in over 12 years." "Yes, but it will cover up the nastiness brought on from the waxing issue." Yes, mother, because bangs that will suck and take forever to grow out again is such a great fix for a problem that should be cleared up in a few days.

This just in

Here's what just happened. It's a good story I think. So, I was meeting Shannon for lunch at this fantastic little Thai place down the street on Michigan. It's another fantastically beautiful day here in Chicago. I had my ipod on and was waiting to cross Michigan with a bunch of people. I was the person closest to Randolph about to cross the street. So, the light changes and I wait the 2 seconds to see if anyone was going to run the light. No one did. So I started to walk, just like everyone else. All of the sudden, there is a car bumper practically attached to my knee. I ended up with my hand on this car that wanted to turn right, right into me. It's the closest I've come to being hit by a car. So, dumb bitch driver stops, I stop, crowd crossing street nearest me stops. I press pause on my ipod. DBD says out the window "I'm sorry BUT...." at this point, I get pissed and scream at her "NO! No I'm sorry but! Either say 'I'm sorry I damn near hit you with my car two seconds ago' or say 'I'm not sorry' but do NOT say 'I'm sorry but'!!!" This is when the strangest thing ever happened. DBD said nothing, but the crowd around me started to clap. It was like out of a movie, albiet a bad one. I managed a half-curtsy and went on my way. No one let her complete her turn. Hm.