Thursday, March 29, 2012

And poof!!

.......just like that, I turned in to a girl.
I woke up this morning with all the longing and self-loathing of Bridget Jones (the first movie).

Trust me, the thoughts in my head are not pretty right now.  For example, they keep telling me I am not pretty.

So, I'm just going to spare you the whining.

Tomorrow night I head to the "south side" aka Bridgeport neighborhood.  The tricycle of awesome will ride before we head out Saturday with many many people - I think there are 16 of us - to New Glarus Wisconsin for a long weekend.  What's there? BEER.  Really good beer, that they do not sell anywhere in Illinois.
We're even renting a minivan. (miniVON?)  No, silly, not for carpooling - for hauling home MORE BEER.

I need this little trip right now.  I need to clear my head, and remind myself that I have value.

Promise to be back on the flip side, with less whining and pining and more fun.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Pissing me off

My head is kinda getting ready to explode.

The back story:

Y'all know I work part time at a music school/concert venue.  There are a couple of hundred people that work and volunteer there.  I am on the concert staff, which puts me in regular contact with a small portion of these employees and volunteers.
There are many "buckets" of people at Old Town - teachers, concert staff, admin staff (with many sub-groups), store staff, desk staff, etc.

Sadly - the desk staff lost one of their own to colon cancer at the devastatingly young age of 31.  She had fought the fight for something like five years.

I fully and honestly admit - I did not know her.  I knew of her.  I know that many of the people at Old Town that I consider friends did know her and were close to her and are grieving.  I have privately contacted most of them to give my condolences and let them know I am thinking of them, in their time of loss.

NOW, what's pissing me off.

So, I'm pretty good at being aware of things, and I consider myself very smart.  Old Town is my favorite thing, so I make a point to know what is what over there.
That being said, I can pretty confidently state the following:
There is a surprising number of people that am glomming on to the grief train who either didn't know her at all, or barely knew her, or never even crossed paths with her.
They are posting things on facebook, and they practically live blogged the memorial service that was held at Old Town.
I cannot imagine why they are doing this.
If they were actually impacted by this horrible thing, then they should do something like, I don't know, maybe donate to colon cancer research, or to the film that is in the works about this young woman?

I hate to say it, but to me it feels like they themselves need some kind of attention, or need to be in the middle of things because it's affecting the Old Town community.  Honestly - not caring for the right reasons.

I was very sad when I heard the news - sad for my friends who lost a friend so young. I was also reminded of the young people I have lost in my life, and there have been far too many of those.  But I posted nothing on facebook.  I did not go to the memorial at Old Town (though open to the public, I didn't feel right about going). 

And I sure as hell will not be acknowledging any of these phony people on this topic.

May angels lead you in B.

Friday, March 23, 2012


I think it's only fair to give you the basics.
So, about two weeks ago, VonMom got sick.
VonMom NEVER gets sick.
So, she got pretty bad and after a week she went to the doctor.
I'd venture a guess she hasn't been to a doctor since she had me, so, you know a while ago.

Of course, many many tests were done.
VonMom prepared for the worst.
Um, yeah.
She's healthier than I am pretty much. No nothing. No cancer, no high blood pressure, no cholesterol issues. Nothing. Minorly elevated blood sugar (of no concern), minorly "off" thyroid (of no concern).
The upside is she's about 2 weeks smoke free.
And she's learned that not all doctors just hand out death sentences.
VonMom is the queen of conspiracy theories.

Now we continue to check in on her, as she's still getting over the initial bronchitis nasty thing she's been fighting.
And we get back to what we call "our new normal".
Which is us, without VonDad.
Back to the diner tomorrow morning, then off to put gas in her car and buy dog food.  All before guitar class.

Looks like I'll have more time to get on her nerves.

So, thanks friends, for all of your kind words.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Serious McSerious pants

So, had some issues this weekend that I'm choosing not to delve into.
I'd like to write a post about something a little more serious, just because it's on my mind.

Over the weekend, I unexpectedly spent the better part of a day alone in the house I grew up in.  At first, I was intrigued and guiltily skulked around opening drawers and cabinets.
I went up to my old room and looked around. It's very clearly my old room, as there are still some belongings of mine there. Some silly (cabbage patch dolls?) some painfully important (the materials purchased for the wedding dress I never got made), but still, my stuff. 
I went into VonSis's old room, and dug a little. Meh, not as much there.

Back downstairs I went to the main floor.  I sat in the living room - still only used on Christmas Eve.  I sat on the couch and had a good cry over VonDad.  It was such a crushing feeling of loss, like it was yesterday.  I ended up talking to him for a good long while. No, he didn't answer me.

Roxie (VonMom's dog) persuaded me to go outside with her for a while.  I don't think she's a fan of crying.  We went out into the massive and glorious yard of my youth.  Giggle. Ok, not just my youth.  I went over to the exact area that my old boyfriend and I used to lie in the middle of the night just talking and smoking cigarettes, sometimes fighting, mostly not, him terrified that my 130 lb Alaskan Malamute Kodi would come outside and join us at any moment.  Me, I was terrified of my parents coming out to find us there. It was the perfect spot, as they were none the wiser.
I walked back over to the patio, at the little cement square that shouldn't be there but is because I had to had to had to have a basketball hoop in junior high.

I went back inside and sat down in the kitchen.

It was there that it hit me - one day (and I so hope it's a long way off) my siblings and I are going to have to go through that house room by room, memory by memory and sell / give away / box up everything in it.  Someday, another family will live there - or worse - someone will tear it down because they are more interested in the large lot of land just sitting there in Chicago.
I moved in to that house when I was 5.  I consider it where my life actually began.  And the sneaking thought behind all of this was that someday, I'm going to lose VonMom too.  We've really barely just begun appreciating each other, and really liking spending time together.

Someday, I'll be a grown up for real.  No, I'll likely never act like one, but someday I'll have to be one because I will have to live the rest of my life without my parents.

I know this is a ramble, but it's coming out of my heart-place instead of my head-place.

So there it is.

Friday, March 16, 2012



I just can't go there right now.


Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Busy busy V

I DO apologize for my absence.
Monday, I took a day off of work, a personal day.  See, I was out late on Sunday, and I.....
I went to Kuma's and slept and then went to a four hour meeting.
I got an iPad, and it's - distracting, to say the least. But, alas, book club book is not going to read itself, the guitar is not going to play itself, the blog is not going to write itself.  So I had to detach the iPad from my fat little fingers and put it down.  It's not even sleeping, it's off.
p.s. - the blogger app? SUCKS

I think I have for real this time no joke hit my limit of activity.
An update:
  • Full time job
  • Part time job
  • Board of directors director(ship? ness?)
  • Sit on three committees
  • Breakfast with VonMom every Saturday at 8:30
  • Guitar class every Saturday at 11:00
  • Family stuff
  • Friend stuff
  • and oh, yeah, write VFN
That's it - I'm toast.  Some people are a little concerned that I seem to sleep all day on the weekends. Well, take a look at the above - really? You wonder why I'm sleeping all day?

I don't really think I'm going to change any of the things, but I do think I need to figure out some way to have more resting time.

And if anyone can tell me how to bar a chord without having the rest of my fingers get all screwy and cramped up, that would be awesome.*

*Musicians' note: Acoustic advice only. Rumor has it it's a lot easier to bar on an electric. m'kay?

Friday, March 9, 2012

Friday Fun Times!! A return!

Your assignment, should you choose to humor me:

Describe yourself using only song lyrics.  The only rule is you must only use one song, no mashups this time around.  Oh, and you have to supply title and artist.

She's sun and rain
She's fire and ice
A little crazy but it's nice
And when she gets mad, best leave her alone

*Every Woman - Garth Brooks

Happy Friday you tuneful peoples

Fridge note first

Hello Readers

I just got an iPad2!!!
I am so silly excited, I pretty much got the whole store all excited too.
See, it went all on sale I finally had enough $$ to get it.  It was a gift from some awesome people.

So, going to be walled up in my apartment this weekend (ok, for the most part) figuring out all the fun little things.


Thursday, March 8, 2012



...umm, mainly drunk-blogging. Well, there's that.
OH! week before last was SUPERB in music releases.
do tell?
We busted Kathleen's. And 3Bulls (Now NOBODY can comment there).
that's sad....
sigh. my life is so dull.
Says the dude who hangs out with one of his favorite bands.....

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I hurt my foot chasing some deer with the dawwg.

I am sad for you. I will take that darn dog off your hands and send you some ice packs.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

See, thunder, I TOLD you Von wasn't off being roadie and guitar tech for Whitesnake.

The less you know, the less I have to deny......

fish said...

I totally had Von pegged as a Warrant kind of girl.

See above. Von is nothing if not.....versatile.....

Michael said...

I was involved in a science experiment while you were away. Although I'm told that I should avoid getting angry, and to buy a lot of purple pants. So there was that... but you were missed.

I thought that was you, looking all serene, rocking some purple pants.  This response color is in honor of you.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

I've joined another fantasy baseball league. That is now two for me for this year.

Can your two teams play against each other?

Von versus Von!
I don't think ANYONE wants to see that. It would be....interesting, at best.

mikey said...

Say, would that be Uncle Johns Band?


The first days are the hardest days

Don'tchu worry any more

'Cause when life looks like easy street

There is danger atcher door...

I don't know if you read the comics but here's a favored take on fantasy sports:


zombie rotten mcdonald said...

While I do not think I was missed very much

jeez, Von, I spent nearly every comment in the last couple of threads hassling you for not being around. What do you need, a show-stopping number?


(sigh) ...OK, here goes. Hit it, Sam!!!


zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I'm itching to call another blogger on the phone and have a chat. For the first time ever. It could happen this week. Any guesses who I am calling?
No one guessed. But due to a nasty stomach ailment, I didn't call. But I will.
Oh boy is there an evil answer I could make to that one....
Go for it. Don't forget I know where you live.  I may not be able to drive there, but there's a train and a taxi that seperates us, that's all.

Smiley back!! :)

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

It's no longer Monday. New Bruce Springsteen album today.
True.  It is now Thursday. And I really really dig all that I have heard of the new album.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

No one left me any Skittles vodka in my absence.

It's like you don't even know us.
I can haz Skittlez vodkas?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Because I was wicked busy doing the worky work things!!! All the things!

Mendacious D said...

My comments aren't even registering. This must be karmic retribution for 3Bulls. All of it.
I used to have a MenD. He doesn't come around these parts too much anymore.  I miss him.
mikey said...

Von seems to have some kind of...I dunno, Life or somedamnthing.


She doesn't seem to place the appropriate level of focus on us imaginary friends.
I will work on it.....

I honestly can't imagine what she does all day and all night...

Send your mind to the gutter, then go darker, then you have your answer.....

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

mikey, right? She definitely needs to re-order her priorities to be more in line with the attitudes of well-balanced individuals like you and me.
I'm working on it!!!!

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Hey Von! Want a Mekons poster?

Is this bribery I see before me?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...



The comments. They are rather superior to my writings this week!!!
I very much like you all. Very much like.
Stay golden, Pony boy.

Monday, March 5, 2012

And then, and then, and then.....

While I do not think I was missed very much, I do know that I very much missed being here.

Not that anything exciting good or bad went on last week, just that I missed this.

Taking a few moments to write some bull shit that someone somewhere might take a few minutes to read.

Work is kicking my ass in the worst way.  To the point that I made some mistakes late in the day on Friday because I felt pressured to get something done.  I knew better.  I knew my eyes and brain were too tired to get this thing finished 100% correctly.  But, I felt it had to be done on Friday.  Not sure if the pressure was internal or external.

I've joined another fantasy baseball league. That is now two for me for this year.  Makes me think I might actually end up giving a shit for longer.  Plus, in my primary league, I have Pujols, so there's that.

I blew off guitar graduation on Saturday.  I feel kinda bad about it, but not too much.  I had over booked my day, and it was a cold shitty weather day.  If I had gone to class/graduation, then my guitar would have been in the car for something like 12 hours - which is SO not good for the guitar.  So I skipped it and went to pick up my new black with flower patterned mary janes instead.  If you know me at all, you know I gotta have a kickin' new pair of mary jane's at least once a year.

My entire family is driving me bat shit. This includes VonMom, VonSis, and the steps.  All of them.  I'm thinking they are the reason I can't sleep at night.

Oh, yeah, I can't sleep at night. Again. Awesome.

I'm working Thursday night at Old Town, and then am off and have zero plans for Friday and Saturday nights.  Stay tuned to see if this actually stays the case. 

This coming Sunday night, John's band is playing at Reggie's in the South Loop.  Because I am an old lady, I will be taking Monday off work.  Ok, I am an old lady, AND the clocks are changing, AND John and Toni are off Monday and are going to Kuma's.  So there's all of the real reasons.

No one left me any Skittles vodka in my absence.

I wonder if Jennifer meant it, and she really will not be back.  That would make me sad.

I'm itching to call another blogger on the phone and have a chat.  For the first time ever.  It could happen this week.  Any guesses who I am calling?

Happy Monday, if you are so inclined.