Something smells funny

Ham French toast casserole (usually, this is all I eat, because I don't like ham, but this year SIL1X put pecans on it) (SIL1X no longer loves me, and wants me to suffer with no casserole) Salad Coleslaw Bread (brought by me, of course.) 1 gigantic loaf of landbrot, some crescent rolls, and some flaky layer biscuits AND THEN: Asparagus with garlic and lime Asparagus with cream cheese and blue cheese wrapped in bread Asparagus with balsamic somethingorother Asparagus with horseradish cream sauce Asparagus quesadillas Asparagus something else I can't remember You'd really like me to be kidding. I'm not VonSis REALLY likes asparagus. She went to the produce store at 7am, so as not to endure the funny looks and head turns as she added a crate of asparagi to her cart - and nothing else -

In other news....

R just dumped me. Step one: Change teh FB relationship status back to single Step two: Unfriend R, TheBrother, TheFiance Step three: Come over to my blog to let my people know

Busy elswhere

SO In taking the week off, I thought I'd be in teh blogosphere less. Not so much. I've been here. And also here. In case anyone is following this drama, I am no longer spam over at 3Bulls. Hence and therefore, I no longer dislike them. Happy Easter. Go Jesus!

A break

This full moon is kicking my ass. Hard. My mind is all aswirl, as are my fragile little emotions. What was I doing when I noticed that it was raining in my living room last night? (long story, for another day) Answer: I was laying on my couch, listening to my iPod and sighing. This is not the person who should be writing posts for you. I'm taking this week off. Be good to yourselves.

How you know.

Do you want to know how you know you are in the presence of the One That Got Away? I can tell you. You see him and your heart skips not one beat but two. It's cold out, but your face is flaming hot. You are sure you are purple. You can feel your eyes light up. You toss your hair. Stop. Pull it back over your shoulder. Did he like your hair longer or shorter? Can't remember. Get frustrated. Contemplate pulling said hair up into a ponytail. Stupid hair. He sees you. Your heart skips beats again, and this time, your stomach drops. You forget where you are, why you are there, and who you are with. He hugs you. You want to keep hugging him. The urge to kiss him is gigantic, enormous. It's so big, you are sure everyone around you knows that you want to kiss him. Words from 16 years ago blast through your mind "Moment of truth, huh babe?" You are sure everyone around you heard this, even though it's only in your silly little mind. When he stops hugging you, you feel yourself leaning in his general direction. Every moment he's around you, you want to touch him. Hold his hand, put your arm around him. This feels like the most natural thing in the world, even though he hasn't been "yours" for 13 years. You want to whisper in his ear, or scream at the top of your lungs "I still love you!". This urge is gigantic, enormous. You think you'll die if you don't say it. You don't say it. Every ounce of your famous self-esteem is gone, vanished, like it had never existed. You can't even bring yourself to give him your phone# or email address. You act like a child and give your info to his sister instead. You kick yourself for this. Repeatedly. When it's time to go, you are physically ill at the thought of leaving. Leaving him. He'll forget me. He'll forget I was here. You have an overwhelming desire to be alone. You want your apartment, something strong to drink, and your bed. For a very very long time. You get home, and immediately get in a hot shower so you can cry in peace. You feel silly for crying but God damn it you love him and you miss him and holy shit. You go to bed insanely early, to avoid drinking alone. You can't sleep. Not a little, not at all. For days after, you have this incredible sadness weighing you down. You know that you could cry at the drop of a hat, and would, but God damn it you're not going to! There's work to be done! Things to do! You know understand, with stunning clarity, that the reason you are the way you are in relationships is because you know that he was the one. And he got away.

Fridge Note

3Bulls hates Von. Yep, I'm back to being spam. s i g h

Wherein I feel the need to share everything with y'all

well, ALMOST everything. The backstory. There's a mouse. In the house. Well, in the commune in which I live. A mouse who poops little tiny poops that announce his existance. Poops that were not seen, or brushed off as "not mouse poops" until: One day last month, VonSis went up to her place one evening. EEEEEEEEEEEE (or so I'm told. again, I didn't her my sister's screams. Bad sister, I am) ***my cell phone rings***** "Didn't you hear me screaming!?!?" "Um. Nope." "I was screaming for like five minutes!!!!!" "Ok. Why were you screaming?" "There was a mouse on my kitchen table!!" BLEH!!! BrotherInLaw/LandOverlord lays out poison. Many many lovely blue pellets of poison. Weeks pass. More weeks pass. -Last night- I happened to go up to VonSis's house for a quick visit after work. BrotherInLaw is home, and the three of us discuss the mouse. Where is the mouse? Why isn't it dead yet? What if it's dead somewhere bad? Now, onto the tale I feel I must tell. This morning. This is the text VonSis and BrotherInLaw/LandOverlord received. From me. At 6:30 am. "OH MY GOD!!! DEAD MOUSE!!! MY BEDROOM!! WHY CAN'T YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING! I DEMAND IMMEDIATE REMOVAL!! ZOMFG!!!!!" silence nothing No running of feet over head to save poor poor me. 6:34 am *my cell phone rings* I'm confused. It's VonSis's work number. "Hello?" "Yeah, so I'm at work." "WHERE IS YOUR HUSBAND!?!?!?" "He's on his way to Kansas, or Missouri, wherever." "But there's a mouse. In.my.bedroom." "Where is it?" "By the hole in the wall, go figure. It's dead." "You sure?" "I've been staring at it for like five minutes. It's dead." VonSis promised dead mouse removal upon her return home tonight. I will not be entering my bedroom until the thing is gone. 7:05am **my cell phone rings** "Hello?" "HAHAHAHAHAAHAAAAA. You have a dead mouse in your bedroom!!! Hahahahaha." "Um, brother-in-law? You suck as a LandOverlord." "HAHAHAHAHA. At least we know where it is now!! Right?!?" "I hate you. It's in my room. IN MY ROOM." click