Announcing:

Tomorrow's post will be schmoopy, not snarky, so for those wanting the snark, please come back another day. Thanks!

Viel Spass!

Best things about MaiFest:

• The happy happy fun loving people.
• The delicious food
• The very chilly Hofbrau Original
• My german flag dress and the many complete strangers who took pictures of me in it
• Hot hot men
• The $$ made for DANK

Worst things about MaiFest:

• The happy happy fun loving people who don't know when they've had enough
• Popped polo shirt collars
• The monsoon that was Saturday night
• The Hawks game that stole our thunder Friday night
• The very chilly Hofbrau Original in my shoes. And my hair. And my clothes.
• Hot hot men being cobags
• That horrible song "I don't want her you can have her she's too fat for me" I fucking hate that song
• The fact that all German/Polka bands think "Country Roads" by John Denver should be played again, and again, and again.......all weekend long
• The fact that when I was finally finished working for the weekend, and only had about four sips of beer that they wanted me to go right back to work in the kitchen. Um, no. I left. Everyone else got to stand around and drink, but not me apparently
• Aching feet, back, neck, etc......
• The Creepy McCreeperstein who told me my name isn't actually my name, my name is Nicki. When I said "No, my sister's name is Nicki" he told me her last name. CREEPY. Neither she nor I actually know this guy. HOT guy, but totally creepy!!

Ein, zwei, zuffa!!

Tis the season, again. It's MayFest weekend. Who's the best bier pourer at MayFest? Faster than lightning, not spilling a drop, lotsa foamy or not so foamy, I can do it all. All while wearing my German flag themed dress. Yep, I rock. The five shifts I was assigned attest to that. Wish me luck. I hope to have some good stories after the weekend. These festivals are always prime for people watching.

Lookie there

Hey! Someone's posting again!!

Also

I'll be moving on to new topics. I've given all I can on the wedding recap. Plus, I don't want to piss anyone off (TheMarty / Shannon) if I write too much snark about their friends. Suffice to say You just can't like all people all the time. Even when a slew of people you do like are telling you how much they like a specific someone. Um, sorry, that particular someone was 11 shades of lame, and I would never, could never be friends with them. Among others with their annoying habits and sundry of things for me to dislike/make fun of/abhor. *ahem* Moving on.

Clearly

So, yeah, no post this weekend. Ask me if I have internet at home ? Nope. I do not. NO internet, no blog posts. Funny how that works. Hopefully I will have the issue resolved by Friday of this week.

and Part 2

The big day. Woke up all on my own (like a grown up), hung over like nobody's business at 7:45am. The Bride offered me whole grain bagel with that bull shit neufchatel (read: NOT cream cheese) cheese. Um no. This tummy needs McDs, stat. And Gatorade. We head out, the Bride, the little cousin of bride, some friend of groom chic (more on her later) and I. Stop at McDs. Get some grease/cheese/bread for tummy. Oh, yeah, I still want to puke, and I still haven't actually puked. Get to DANK. Ribbons/bows/flowers/etc......girly things you wouldn't really be interested in. Back to condo. Hair. Makeup. Female bonding aka Thai food and "Pretty in Pink" (finally). I've never been more calm and unrushed getting ready for a wedding before. That went really well. All beautiful and ready. To DANK. In cabs. This is how we roll. NO The Bride did NOT wear her wedding dress in the cab. Things get a little more stressful here. One of the grooms men was totally late, so that messed up the picture taking. There was no professional photographer, so there was a lot of not knowing what to do when and where. The ceremony was beautiful and very short. One of the bridesmaids Rick Rolled the ceremony, which was killer, and OH YEAH, IT WAS ALSO MY IDEA. Her "reading" consisted entirely of the lyrics to "Never Gonna Give You Up" and a little "It Takes Two" by Rob Base and DJ Easy Rock. Awesome. After the ceremony we all headed back up for more pictures, or so I thought, but no, the entire population of guests are smokers, so they all immediately invaded the terrace, so no more pictures. I said f this, not sure what I'm staying up here for then, and I went downstairs to say hello to some people. GOD FORBID I got yelled by easily four people that I shouldn't be down there, and it's time to line up for the introductions and blah blah blah.....hence we entered the 'hurry up and wait' portion of the evening. Sorry, I don't play that game. I basically told all of those yelling at me to fuck off, and I was going to do what I wanted. Guess who was in place and ready to go for the introductions?!? Yep, that would be me. Was everyone else? Um, nope. THEN I was introduced as Yvette. Dear readers, this is NOT MY NAME. Thankfully, DJ corrected himself, and 75% of the people knew me anyway, but still, that part kinda sucked. Each introduced group had their own song that Bride and Groom had picked out for them. Mine and the best man's was "Mah na ma nah" song. I felt a little bad for the best man because this song was selected for me. He thought it was cool though. The best thing was that they had a photo room set up with all sorts of props and such with a photographer all night. He had a projector set up and uploaded the pics right away for all to see. It was a huge hit. Pretty late in the evening, I said to the Bride - "So, we haven't had one picture taken of us all night." Into the photo room we went for some shots. I know in one of them we are holding a little chalk board that says "besties". I can't wait to see all of those pictures! So. There was dancing. Lots of it. There were cupcakes (we totally hid some behind the bar so we could eat them on Sunday). I think there was food (I missed that part). There was drinking and some shots (who me?). And there were speeches. I'm not going to lie. My speech kicked ass. The beginnings of my speech came to me while I was in the shower. I slept on it, and the next day I wrote it all down. I'm going to brag here and state that I didn't do any rewrites. I felt pretty confident in what I wrote. The first part of my speech was to Shannon. The middle part was to TheMarty, the end was to both with an Irish blessing thrown in. I thought it was good. I didn't cry, but will admit I hoped they would tear up. Come to find out throughout the rest of the evening that LOTS of people cried at my speech. They also laughed exactly when they were supposed to, and I even got some unexpected applause at one point. I got more compliments on that than I can count. I think I will either rewrite it nicely or type it up and give them a nice clean copy. Wedding over, a small gathering of people headed back to the condo for some late night deep dish pizza ordering. Once we kicked one of the bridesmaids and a much much younger friend of the groom out of Shannon and Marty's room (EWWW - and Have a little respect for your friends that just got married!) I went to bed. It was like 4am. This post is toooooo long. I will write a part three with the Day After and my musings on a few of the people that were there sometime over the weekend. I know you are all on pins and needles.