Thursday, May 5, 2011

I revel in my contradictions

Friday night, my friend K told me that the Big 4 is coming to Chicago.
If you don't know, it's Metallica, Anthrax, Megadeth, and Slayer
This may or may not be true (no date has been officially announced)
BuT
It got me to thinking.
One of the things I love, and have always loved, about going to metal shows is the hot men with the looooong hair.
Hot. Really hot.
I dig long hair. I always have, and likely, always will.

Then, I thought some more....
What kind of man turns my head on a regular basis?
Bald men.

Every day, I will nod and smile at hot bald men.
Hot. Really hot.

So, turns out I like:
Long haired men
Bald men

Could I be more inconsistent?

I looked back over my long and sordid romantic history.....
Turns out I have never dated either!
Sure, I've had some *special* times with some long-haired darlings,  but VonMom pretty much would have hated and possibly killed any long haired, leather jacketed dude I might have brought home for a meet and greet.
And the bald bandits of my heart?
Haven't even kissed one.

Looks like I found my plan for summer 2011.
Everyone needs a plan.

13 comments:

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Friday night, my friend K told me that the Big 4 is coming to Chicago.

One of the things I love, and have always loved, about going to metal shows is the hot men with the looooong hair.
...
Then, I thought some more....
What kind of man turns my head on a regular basis?
Bald men.


Funny, at first glance I thought the Big 4 meant BBBB.
~

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

What kind of man turns my head on a regular basis?
Bald men.


To be fair, the sun's glare on a baldie's head is eye-catching.

Jennifer said...

I second what Thunder said.

Jennifer said...

the sun's glare on a baldie's head is eye-catching.

Actually, the glare makes it look like they have long hair made of the sun's rays. Win/Win for Von!

Kathleen said...

excellent plan.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

and you can kiss those baldies on the top of the head too.

Or bite 'em, if y'all take my advice re: zombie.

mikey said...

My hair is several feet long and kind of a pewter grey. In the ongoing breakdown of all my previously taken-for-granted physical attributes, it is the one feature remaining that regularly, even daily, receives complements from strangers.

Plus, in silicon valley tech circles, a grey pony tail contributes +7 to one's intrinsic credibility, although there are myriad ways to reduce this windfall in short order.

No real point - it just occurred to me that this is data Von should have...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

my plan for summer 2011.

you have a plan that doesn't involve Summerfest?

(pout)

Mandos said...

For a moment I thought the title was "I revel in my contraindications."

Von said...

Mandos - it could....
Z - I'm totally coming to Summerfest, just to visit you. We'll talk.

I have no problem stating that if B4 were heading to Chicago this summer, I'd greet him with as much if not MORE enthusiasm than I would the Big 4.

Mikey - Noted!!

mikey said...

As to the "Big 4", am entirely ambivalent about Slayer and find Anthrax to be an unpleasant sonic assault, something akin to a southern gentleman being tortured in the midst of some heavy road repair work.

Metallica is hit and miss, some of it, particularly Fuel and Whiskey in the Jar (yep - liked it better than the Thin Lizzy original, which sounded more like a dirge than a party) I am very fond of.

But Megadeth. Yes! Some important chapters in the soundtrack of my life are Megadeth songs, and contributing to that is the fact that I have spent many hours in long, quiet, intense conversations with Dave that I found both enlightening and entertaining. So I'm just going to think of it as the Big one and a half...

W/V listens to Anthrax and arrives at a similar conclusion, declaring reaker

Von said...

Well, I like them all. But thanks for your opinion.

mikey said...

My pleasure.

You know, I don't just give my opinion to anyone. But I thought you deserved it...