Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Uh oh

it's.....NATO!

Or, as I've begun calling it, NATOggedon.  Remember Snowmaggedon Chicagoans? This is like that, but longer and more annoying.

My train? Packed.  Wicked packed. Wussy suburbanites who can't sit their precious asses in traffic have started infiltrating my mode of transportation.  OH AND on Monday there are all these horrendous rules for the trains - no backpacks, no bottles of water, no food, no bag bigger than this x this, no breathing, no talking, no nothing at all!

My walking around downtown land? Awful - trust fund baby "protesters" with their $500 designer pre-torn up jeans, iPhones, Bulgari watches and look-at-me-I'm-bad-ass faux-hawks aplenty.  I'd really like to ask just one of them if they can fully explain to me what they are protesting, but I don't have the time or bail money......

My office building?  Still the least secure building in the entire downtown area.  Their idea of "enhanced safety measures" include laminated badges that a 2nd grader with some free time can duplicate (no photo, no bar code, nothing), a thin nylon thing that prevents you from going up a flight of stairs, a security dude outside "walking the perimeter" (which translates to ogling chicks).  Yep, I feel so safe now!! And from who? Protesters? Terrorists? Not quite sure on that one.

The lazy people at work, the ones who beg for a snow day the second the flurries start, have begun their campaigns to work from home Friday and Monday.  Mmm hmmm  - I am SO sure that you will be actually working! In the safety of your living room, with your kids climbing all over you, your t.v. on, etc.  You're right! You are totally trying this b.s. for your own well-being!

Everyone who does not live in the Chicagoland area - please stop asking me about NATO.  I don't have an inside track on it, I am not an expert on any NATO related topic, and honestly I could care less.

Oh, and guess what!?!?!?  Y'all know how incredibly smart I am, right?
Yours truly is FLYING OUT OF CHICAGO ON FRIDAY AND BACK IN ON MONDAY. Yep, that was the brightest decision I've made all year!!! O'Hare airport, in the middle of NATO traveling traffic.  Lucky me.  At least that should make for some interesting blogging next week......

7 comments:

mikey said...

Well, y'gotta pick a side, and I side with the protesters. NATO's been getting increasingly activist, from Kosovo to Afghanistan to Libya. For a Cold War coalition force that no longer has a natural enemy or a good reason to exist, and yet still refuses to place themselves under the United Nations command structure, they don't appear to me to represent anything but a threat to freedom, a pan-national army in the service of the authoritarians...

Von said...

Actually, I DON'T have to pick a side.
I'm on my side on this one.
And, I'll be in Denver while all this b.s. is going on.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I'm on the side of not blowing people up for corporate profits!

P.S. Take care, Von. I have 20 seconds or so of the Frank Fetch Park fountain I can put up. Of course, it'll take about 45 minutes to upload it to youtube...
~

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

(which translates to ogling chicks).

Good work if you can get it!

Michael said...

We were totally thinking the same way today! Hilarious!

Brando said...

Really, there's nothing the terrorists can do to Chicagoans that bratwurst, deep dish, and Old Style haven't already done.

Also, as someone who works at home, I do work. I'm working right now. Right as I read this post and type this comment.

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