Last Night.

Sometimes when I talk about VonMom, people think I am either exaggerating, or being too harsh. I love my mom. However. Here's what happened last night when I popped over to VonParentsHaus for a visit. Me: "Blah blah blah, cousin blah blah" **both parents simultaneously interrupt me to say stupid and incorrect things that they think I might say next, when I was actually trying to fill them in on something totally new*** Me: "SIGH!! No! That's not at all what I'm talking about!" Yes, I was irate VonMom: "Do we piss you off?" VonDad (God, I seriously LOVE my dad!!) kinda didn't say anything. I changed the subject. A little while later just between VonMom and I: Me: "So, to answer your previous question, you piss me off when I am talking and you interrupt me and talk over me. All. The. Time." VonMom: "Well, you finish people's sentences and stuff." Me: "Really? Like when you tell me the same story three or four times? And I finish it for you? Like then?" VonMom: "Well, you just get so angry." Me: "Because you interrupt me. You've been doing it forever. It pisses me off." VonMom: "You get so angry." Me: "Because it's rude. You don't let me speak." So, we both drop it. Drum roll please!! Not five minutes later: VonMom: "I bought you something." Me: "Oh." VonMom: "You're probably going to get pissed. And hate it." Me: "Great. Give it to me." VonMom: "It's a book." Me: "Mmmhm." VonMom comes back in the room and hands me.............. 'Finally Thin: How I lost 200 Pounds! And you can too!' Me: "You know, if I lost 200 pounds I would be dead, or at least really freaky looking." VonMom: sigh Me: "Yeah. Great." VonMom: "I thought you would find camaraderie in it." Me: "Camaraderie? What?!?" VonMom: "Well, I just read the jacket. It's uplifting you know." Me: "A fat book. Thanks." VonMom: "Are you going to read it?" Me: "I'll take it home." VonMom: "You hate it. You're pissed." Me: " Mmmhm." VonMom: "Do you want a cookie or donut before you go meet your friends for pizza?" None of the above is embellished. I didn't add anything for an entertainment factor. This is my life. This is my mother. Said angrily "You get so angry!" Said lovingly "You're fat. Want some cake?" Anyone want a book written by some formerly fat chick?

Politics, again!

Ok, so I've got a few things to say. I am going to first agree with Laura and say that we should not see the First Family in US Weekly. It might have been a bit of a gray area when President Obama was the President Elect, but now, as the leader of the free world he should be treated as such, and not on the same level of "celebrity" as, say, Paris Hilton. Let's leave him on the pedestal on which he belongs, not gossip rag fodder, but more on the real and actual news pages he belongs on. That being said. More than one person had voiced to me yesterday that they were a little tired of all of the coverage that the inauguration was getting. Hm. Who remembers four years ago? Can anyone honestly say there was more or less coverage? More or less celebrity guests? (Ok, bad Republican celebrity guests, but still) More or less fanfare? No one actually knows, because no one was paying attention! Not one of my young democrat friends gave enough of a shit. See, I distinctly remember turning OFF any and all of the Bush2 celebrations because I couldn't believe we were celebrating four more years of crap. One thing I can speak to (because I looked it up): President Obama's number of Inaugural Balls - 10 - Including the super fantastic Neighborhood Ball that he created as a celebration For. The. People. Former (phew!) President Bush's 2nd term Inaugural Balls - 9. So, you say, you cynic - See? President Obama has a lot! Like the most! Show off! NOT SO FAST. The most Inaugural Balls ever held? President Clinton holds the record at 14! FOURTEEN!! Plus, I don't think the President himself is responsible for the fanfair. Let's not blame him, ok people? On another note. I'm really really annoyed at the women who spent part of yesterday discussing the wardrobe choices of the First Lady and the Vice President's wife. I don't care what Michelle or Jill were wearing. NOT IMPORTANT. As far as their clothes? The most I care is if they were warm. I hope Michelle's feet didn't hurt when she walked part of the parade route. We should not be discussing whether Jill's boots were a solid choice or if Michelle looks good in yellow. By discussing that you demean those two great ladies, and, in my opinion, you demean all women. You present the image that, even on what is one of the most important days in our living history, that we might be so shallow as to discuss at length their clothes. What do I think about when I look at Michelle Obama and Jill Biden? I think 'How strong they are. How brave. They know that they are a part of something huge, and country altering. They could lose their husbands over the small minds and prejudices of some of their own countrymen. They stands by their husbands as no one else can.' I don't think 'Huh. Nice dress.' God Bless President Obama. May his enthusiasm and our country's general uplifted mood last and last. For at least the next eight years.

I'm a sappy mess

So, yesterday I was flipping through the channels, not really thinking what I was looking for. I stumbled upon the Best Thing Ever. HBO was showing the Inaugural Celebration. I was crying within, oh, like 30 seconds. Bruce Springsteen opened the show with that "The Rising" song. I've never before been super huge into the Boss, I could have even taken him or left him in the past. But now, I have this huge new thing for him. Like a willing to spend mega $$ on tickets should he tour soon thing. So, during this song, he's singing, and there's this choir, and he's all grinning like he's just thrilled to be there. It was awesome. It was two solid hours of awesome. Some other highlights: James Taylor. I mean - JAMES TAYLOR (I've been obsessed with him for a couple of years now) Stevie Wonder. Sure, he played with Usher and Shakira, but that was okey dokey. Garth Brooks. He sang "American Pie" (I squealed aloud on that one), "Twist and Shout" and "We shall be Free" (one of his own). So so so good. He's another one I would pay big bucks to see live. I'm not generally a country gal, but I do love me some Garth Brooks. Pete Seeger. PETE SEEGER leading the whole damn crowd in "This land is your land, this land is my land." U2 singing the shit out of "Pride" followed by a little "City of Blinding Light" or whatever it's called. AGAIN a band I would spend money on to see live. The only downside on the singing part was Beyonce singing the national anthem or whatever the hell she sang. I kind of in general hate her nasally, trilly, not-spectacular voice. I hate her persona. I hate her clothes. I'm not surprised she was on the show, I just wish we could have done without her. Another side-note on the singing people - JOhn Mellencamp - he looks old. Sings great still, but looks OLD. In between all of the awesome singing, they had actor/esses speak. They quoted memorable moments from past inaugurations and speeches. It gave me chills. Jamie Foxx did a spot on impression of Obama, quoting the speech from Grant Park on 11/4. I cried and cried and cried. Every time they showed Obama beaming, or singing along, or looking serious, I got chills. Finally, someone I can stand behind, and be really excited about. I know, I know, I've swore up and down that I won't get political here on this ole' bloggy blog. The thing is, I'm so excited about Obama. I believe in him, something I've not felt in all the years I've been able to vote. That being said, I'm sure my sappy little ass will probably tear up a little, or a lot, but I am ok with that.

Aaarrgggh

I know that I have been complaining a lot about the weather, but I think I'm just going to keep at it. See, it's what's on my mind, and it's a whole lot of all there is right now. I don't really think that people not from here get it. I mean really get it. See, your snot? It really does freeze up. In your nose. Every time you go outside. I currently have two matching red/purple lines across my wrists. Why you ask? Well, they are from the parts of my arms that weren't covered this morning while waiting for the train. Nope, not kidding. What are plastic lawn chairs good for? Mainly one thing - to mark your spot! Even the mayor said that it's ok to do it. You dug it out, it's yours until the snow goes away - you know, like mid-April. My face looks sunburned. So do a lot of Chicagoans. Have we been vacationing? Nope. It's windburn. It hurts, it cracks, my skin feels weird. It's pretty unavoidable, and not at all cute. It also doesn't cover up really well with makeup. I can't feel my nose, even when I'm inside. I think it's going to fall off. I refuse to wear a ski-mask. So shoot me. Did you know that they light the train switches ON FIRE when it's this cold?!? I didn't! So, I'm on the train the other day, and as we're approaching the station, there's all these fires everywhere - and no one seems concerned but me! I asked this chick, and she said "Oh, yeah, they light the switches on fire so they don't freeze." ON FIRE. That's hard core people!! It's colder in Chicago right now than it is in the North Pole. And colder than Alaska. No, I'm not making it up. Look it up if you don't believe me.

WWW

Winter Weather Warnings make me cranky. No blog right now. Maybe later. Too cranky. Feet frozen. Hair staticy and messed up. Nose red. Clothes damp. Anyone want to spirit me away to like, say, Florida for the weekend? I'll buy the first round of umbrella drinks!!

I just have to say

I just have to say that I love the word: Circumvent Ok, back to your day. Thanks for stopping by.

Since I can't actually mail them....I give you these.....

Dear Blank, Thank you for the scarf and gloves. The colors are so ugly, I think a blind person would find them offensive. P.S. Polyester makes me itch. Dear You, Thanks for that thing that I might use, like, once. Sure, you can borrow it whenever you want. I know it's really for you anyway. Dear M, Thanks for the pile of junk you pulled out of some $0.99 bin last year on 12/26. Nothing says Happy Birthday Jesus like a travel manicure kit and a book light. I know, you dig quantity. To whom it may concern, Thanks for the jewelry I might have considered wearing (but would probably have decided against) 20 years ago. I wanted to return it, but a) I don't shop where you bought it and b) I know you will be looking for me to wear it the next time I see you. Damn you. I didn't know you disliked me so much. Dear Self, Thanks so much for the Nintendo DS. My "brain age" has greatly improved! Thank you also for the Neal Gaiman books! Thanks for the lovely OPI nailpolishes! You really know what I like. Thank GOd for you! And thank God for credit cards!