I don't get it

So I finally watched "Up" yesterday. Everyone had warned me how awfully sad it was. "The first 20 minutes will kick your ass!" "Everyone I know was sobbing in the beginning!" "Don't watch it! It's so sad!" "You'll be sobbing the whole time!" blah blah and blah Not only did I not lose my shit the first twenty minutes, I don't understand why anyone would. It's a bittersweet story, but anyone who saw any preview would know that the old man is alone, so hence, his wife is dead. I thought it was done well, but no, there was no sobbing. You know when I did tear up? When the bad guy kicked Dug. And when the mean dogs kicked Dug. Overall it was a fine movie. I didn't cry at all. Pretty much all it did for me was make me want a dog. It doesn't take much to make me want a dog. SO, basically, I don't get it.

I'm really good at one thing

minds out of the gutter, geesh I'm really good at filling up my time. Or, not "pissing my life away", as VonDad likes to put it. So Originally, this weekend was supposed to be spent in Elkhorn WI, putting up tents at one of my favorite places on Earth, Juniper Knoll Girl Scout camp. I could cry that I'm not going, but the one person Laura and I knew who was going backed out, so we did too. Funny, two weeks ago I was all 'Sigh, I might actually miss R while I'm in WI for the weekend.' Well, we all know how that turned out. So instead, I've managed to overfill my weekend to the point of burstin'. Last night, went to see "Breakfast Club, the Musical" at Studio Be. Had a lovely time with some awesome people. Plus, I'm kinda friends with one of the girls in the chorus, so I did her a solid by going, so upside. Tonight I'm having dinner and drinks with TheMarty. No Shannon. Just us, two/thirds of the tricycle of awesome. Haven't seen him since Christmas I think, so it'll be good. Tomorrow. I'm tired just thinking about tomorrow Tomorrow I have guitar at 11. TheMarty is picking me up from class to go directly to Pilsen (do not pass go, do not collect $200) for wedding arts and crafts fun with Shannon and some other random people. TheMarty will then take me back to my car, at which point I will hurry home and doll myself up for super awesome evening with Laura. We're going to Pepe's for dinner (by choice! We do it by choice man!), followed by tickets to Muvico (super fancy movie theater) where we have $20/piece premiere tickets to "Clash of the Titans" in 3D. Premeire means cushy over sized love seats instead of chairs, free popcorn, and NO ONE UNDER THE AGE OF 21. And oh, yeah, they serve you cocktails at your seats. After that there may be some drinking (if I'm still awake) Sunday There's a bbq at VonSis's inlaws. I may go as there may be food there, and there is likely to be no food in my own house. At this point, looking ahead to my awesomely busy, yet still awesome weekend, I have just one thing to say: R who?

Perry Farrell is lame

There, I said it. Count me among the millions that were excited, nah, ELATED when a few years ago PF announced for all the world that Lollapalooza was being reborn! And only in Chicago! And it's going to be three days! And it's awesome!! I was downright gleeful. Me, who had been to the first 7 of the original Lollas. The ones that toured the country and were all in one day. Sure, you got heat stroke, and 3rd degree sunburns, but you were there! From 9am until 1am! It was exciting to be introduced to new bands, like Smashing Pumpkins 'huh, I like this song, they are likely to take off'. A sampling of bands that I saw, back in the day: 91.. Nine Inch Nails, Souxsie and the Banshees (I LOVED them!), Rollins Band, Violent Femmes 92.Ministry, Soundgarden, Pearl Jam, Rage Against the Machine 93. Primus, Tool (little known!! on to awesome!) Front 242 (I LOVED them!), Dinosaur Jr. 94.** Favorite year ever!! ** Beastie Boys, Smashing Pumpkins, George Clinton & P Funk Allstars, The Flaming Lips 95. The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Cypress Hill, Hole, Pavement! 96. Metallica, Ramones, Soundgarden (again!), Rancid 97. Snoop Doggy Dog, Beck, Old 97s, Prodigy. Funny, I have the shittiest memory EVER, but I remember every single Lolla I went to. And how much fun they were. And what a kick ass vibe. And, man, I want to be that age again!! Yes, I went to EVERY original Lolla. So, I feel I AM MORE THAN QUALIFIED to tell you this This year's Lolla? Train wreck Travesty Evil incarnate Just plain fucking wrong A sampling of 2010 Lollapalooza's "artists": Lady Gaga Green Day Metric The Big Pink Javelin Minus the Bear Skybox Oh, are you even still reading this crap? Who the f*cK are these people??? And why, why, why if they played shitty assed Pitchfork (stab me!!) are they playing Lollapafukcinglooza this year!?!?!? There's something like 12 bands that have that distinction. True, I am wholly ANTI-HIPSTERS. But, I am PRO good awesome kick ass music. The hipsters can and do have their festival. It's called Pitchfork. And you wouldn't catch me anywhere near there. Ever. Not even for a million dollars. Lollapalooza is for a different crowd. A much harder, edgier, better, cooler crowd. One cannot blend the two. We will eat the hipsters for breakfast. I could not be more disappointed!! Thank GOD I didn't buy the stupid advance ticket!! Perry Farrell is lame. He's soft, and he's getting o l d. I'm so NOT getting old!! If there was anyone, ANYONE worth seeing at Lolla this year, you bet your ass I'd be there, right up front, moshing my happy little self away. But there isn't. So I won't. Damn you Perry Farrell. Damn you.

Something smells funny

Ham French toast casserole (usually, this is all I eat, because I don't like ham, but this year SIL1X put pecans on it) (SIL1X no longer loves me, and wants me to suffer with no casserole) Salad Coleslaw Bread (brought by me, of course.) 1 gigantic loaf of landbrot, some crescent rolls, and some flaky layer biscuits AND THEN: Asparagus with garlic and lime Asparagus with cream cheese and blue cheese wrapped in bread Asparagus with balsamic somethingorother Asparagus with horseradish cream sauce Asparagus quesadillas Asparagus something else I can't remember You'd really like me to be kidding. I'm not VonSis REALLY likes asparagus. She went to the produce store at 7am, so as not to endure the funny looks and head turns as she added a crate of asparagi to her cart - and nothing else -

In other news....

R just dumped me. Step one: Change teh FB relationship status back to single Step two: Unfriend R, TheBrother, TheFiance Step three: Come over to my blog to let my people know

Busy elswhere

SO In taking the week off, I thought I'd be in teh blogosphere less. Not so much. I've been here. And also here. In case anyone is following this drama, I am no longer spam over at 3Bulls. Hence and therefore, I no longer dislike them. Happy Easter. Go Jesus!

A break

This full moon is kicking my ass. Hard. My mind is all aswirl, as are my fragile little emotions. What was I doing when I noticed that it was raining in my living room last night? (long story, for another day) Answer: I was laying on my couch, listening to my iPod and sighing. This is not the person who should be writing posts for you. I'm taking this week off. Be good to yourselves.

How you know.

Do you want to know how you know you are in the presence of the One That Got Away? I can tell you. You see him and your heart skips not one beat but two. It's cold out, but your face is flaming hot. You are sure you are purple. You can feel your eyes light up. You toss your hair. Stop. Pull it back over your shoulder. Did he like your hair longer or shorter? Can't remember. Get frustrated. Contemplate pulling said hair up into a ponytail. Stupid hair. He sees you. Your heart skips beats again, and this time, your stomach drops. You forget where you are, why you are there, and who you are with. He hugs you. You want to keep hugging him. The urge to kiss him is gigantic, enormous. It's so big, you are sure everyone around you knows that you want to kiss him. Words from 16 years ago blast through your mind "Moment of truth, huh babe?" You are sure everyone around you heard this, even though it's only in your silly little mind. When he stops hugging you, you feel yourself leaning in his general direction. Every moment he's around you, you want to touch him. Hold his hand, put your arm around him. This feels like the most natural thing in the world, even though he hasn't been "yours" for 13 years. You want to whisper in his ear, or scream at the top of your lungs "I still love you!". This urge is gigantic, enormous. You think you'll die if you don't say it. You don't say it. Every ounce of your famous self-esteem is gone, vanished, like it had never existed. You can't even bring yourself to give him your phone# or email address. You act like a child and give your info to his sister instead. You kick yourself for this. Repeatedly. When it's time to go, you are physically ill at the thought of leaving. Leaving him. He'll forget me. He'll forget I was here. You have an overwhelming desire to be alone. You want your apartment, something strong to drink, and your bed. For a very very long time. You get home, and immediately get in a hot shower so you can cry in peace. You feel silly for crying but God damn it you love him and you miss him and holy shit. You go to bed insanely early, to avoid drinking alone. You can't sleep. Not a little, not at all. For days after, you have this incredible sadness weighing you down. You know that you could cry at the drop of a hat, and would, but God damn it you're not going to! There's work to be done! Things to do! You know understand, with stunning clarity, that the reason you are the way you are in relationships is because you know that he was the one. And he got away.

Fridge Note

3Bulls hates Von. Yep, I'm back to being spam. s i g h

Wherein I feel the need to share everything with y'all

well, ALMOST everything. The backstory. There's a mouse. In the house. Well, in the commune in which I live. A mouse who poops little tiny poops that announce his existance. Poops that were not seen, or brushed off as "not mouse poops" until: One day last month, VonSis went up to her place one evening. EEEEEEEEEEEE (or so I'm told. again, I didn't her my sister's screams. Bad sister, I am) ***my cell phone rings***** "Didn't you hear me screaming!?!?" "Um. Nope." "I was screaming for like five minutes!!!!!" "Ok. Why were you screaming?" "There was a mouse on my kitchen table!!" BLEH!!! BrotherInLaw/LandOverlord lays out poison. Many many lovely blue pellets of poison. Weeks pass. More weeks pass. -Last night- I happened to go up to VonSis's house for a quick visit after work. BrotherInLaw is home, and the three of us discuss the mouse. Where is the mouse? Why isn't it dead yet? What if it's dead somewhere bad? Now, onto the tale I feel I must tell. This morning. This is the text VonSis and BrotherInLaw/LandOverlord received. From me. At 6:30 am. "OH MY GOD!!! DEAD MOUSE!!! MY BEDROOM!! WHY CAN'T YOU HEAR ME SCREAMING! I DEMAND IMMEDIATE REMOVAL!! ZOMFG!!!!!" silence nothing No running of feet over head to save poor poor me. 6:34 am *my cell phone rings* I'm confused. It's VonSis's work number. "Hello?" "Yeah, so I'm at work." "WHERE IS YOUR HUSBAND!?!?!?" "He's on his way to Kansas, or Missouri, wherever." "But there's a mouse. In.my.bedroom." "Where is it?" "By the hole in the wall, go figure. It's dead." "You sure?" "I've been staring at it for like five minutes. It's dead." VonSis promised dead mouse removal upon her return home tonight. I will not be entering my bedroom until the thing is gone. 7:05am **my cell phone rings** "Hello?" "HAHAHAHAHAAHAAAAA. You have a dead mouse in your bedroom!!! Hahahahaha." "Um, brother-in-law? You suck as a LandOverlord." "HAHAHAHAHA. At least we know where it is now!! Right?!?" "I hate you. It's in my room. IN MY ROOM." click

just gonna type

It's not like we were friends anymore. I don't know when the last time I saw him was. But, I had known him since I was 5. Gary Gnu. That's what we called him. Not we, like a couple people, we like everyone. The whole neighborhood. Kids, their parents, other kids from nearby neighborhoods. I bullied him, picked on him, picked fights with him. He bullied me, picked on me, picked fights with me. My oldest brother-in-law befriended him while we were in high school. Broinlaw played softball in the field right across from Gary's house. He asked me to leave Gary alone. Whatever. I didn't give it a second thought. Then right after high school, I started dating someone who was best friends with Gary. We started spending all of our time at Gary's house. It was one block over from mine, but far enough away my parents never knew I was there, daily, drinking Grand Slam 30 packs of Old Style that somehow seemed to get there, even though none of us was legal. Gary wasn't so bad. Sure, he was a little off, but he was funny, crazy, not much different than the rest of us. I dated that guy on and off for three years. Throughout our tumultuous relationship, Gary was around. He never got in the middle of our many fights, he'd just sit there and shrug, never really taking either side. The ex and Gary used to go over to the forest preserve right across from his house. The ex said he and Gary would have these incredibly long conversations over there. I'd asked once what they talked about. "Everything, Von, we talked about everything from yogurt to God." Like it or not, he was part of our group. Here we are, a number of years later. Tomorrow is Gary's wake. He died, suddenly, Friday at 37 years old. Of course I will be going to the wake. He was a part of my childhood, my memories of the neighborhood that I grew up in, and where my parents still live. He was a big part of one of my favorite times of my life, those first few years right out of high school. I have a feeling that that wake is going to be packed. Though nervous to go, and be around my ex, my heart really goes out to him. I can't imagine how devastated he is. I just want to hug him, and his sister, and Gary's mom, all at once. Tomorrow is going to be a rough day. ** Side note. It's only because of teh fb that I found out about Gary. I'm fb friends with the ex's sister, and she posted something on her status. I emailed her and got the details. FB is good for somethings, it seems.**

Cowboy meh

Friday night I got to volunteer for the Cowboy Junkies show at Old Town. I've never gotten to work one of their shows before, and I was excited. I was early. Really early~!! The show I was working started at 10:00, so I was supposed to be there at 9:00. Well, it was Friday night, and I was tired, so I showed up more like 8:00. This gave me a chance to check out the band. Meh. A little too low key for me. Being so early gave me a leg up on the head vol for my show. I took the clipboard and assigned myself box office. This would keep me off my feet (or off my bad knee, actually) and keep me out of the hall. If I had to sit there through that mellow mess of Junkie, I would have fallen asleep fo sho. It was a good night, one of those nights that all of the staff people were totally awesome. People I either am friends with or would like to be. So, I'm sitting, crocheting, minding my business. And here comes the opening act. Grant Lee Phillips. Sure, his original intent was to check out with the concert staff, get his $$ and go. That's not what happened. He hung around. He chatted. He picked up a banjo and strummed around the office a bit. Let me tell you, even when he hums it's purely melodic. I developed a quick little crush on him, due to his awesomeness and laidback coolness. I just sat there and piped in every now and then. Then I had one of those thoughts again: 'I love this place!! This is the awesome stuff that happens here, and nowhere else! I love this place! I love my life!' Right about that time, one of the Cowboy Junkies walks up to me at the desk: "Ice?" I shake my head and point over to the cafe. Yep, he was supposed to be on stage at the time. Awesome. Guitar update: Learned 3 new chords. Also learned "Bring it on home", one of my favorite songs ever. Cannot feel my left hand index finger. Some people -including Grant Lee Phillips - that this is normal.

By Request

At brunch with Laura this morning: L: "So, as a follower of your blog. I have to ask something." V: eyebrows raised in inquiry. Fork slightly moved to indicate 'go ahead' L: "The post you keep saying you're going to write, and not writing.......write it." Far be it from me to let down the reader. SOOOOO A week or so ago, R and I decided to change our Relationship Status on teh facebook to In a Relationship. (or, relationSHIT, thanks Dane Cook, back when you were funny....) It was kind of a joke, barely a "thing". It was pretty late, we were drinking, we decided to make the change. We agreed that the actual relationshit would not change, at all, just taking a step more publicly. We laughed about it, then let TheBrother know that we had come to this "big" decision. A couple of days later, I made the change. Apparently, you cannot be in a relationshit with someone on teh facebook unless they confirm it. So for a day or two it just said Von is "in a relationshit" Oh my God, the backlash. Well, I call it backlash. 800 people "liked it" many many many people left a comment. My favorite? "Oh! Von! You make me so happy! I am so happy for you! You deserve all sorts of wonderful things! I'm practically crying I am so happy!!!!" this was from one of the J5 (refresher, the J5 are my step-siblings) I got PISSED. In my own comments I wrote "Thanks, but you all seem to be making a much bigger deal of all this than it actually is...." Then, another fb friend emailed me and said "yeah, I was wondering how you felt about that." I wrote her back that I was pissed. I am pissed!! First of all, it is so not a big deal. To make it a big deal would give R a wrong impression. One that I do not want to give, but have no control over. I cannot not have control over things with R. That would be bad. Second: WTF. Of the 745 people who "liked it", and the many many commentors, REALLY!?!?!? Why am I validated now that I am in a relationship? Did you really think I was a spinster? I've been jokingly calling myself one for a while now, but I was joking, people!!!! You may not understand it, but I love my life. I love every crazy, busy, active, exciting, snarky, second of it. Whether or not I have someone in it to share it with is pretty irrelevant to me. R gets to stick around because not only does he not resent my busy schedule, but he digs it, and is cool with it. He gets to stay because he compliments my life, not takes away from it. Also since teh f.b. status change, I've gotten more emails from the J5 and a few others with offers of things to do, invites, etc. C'mon, people. I am NOT stupid!! You don't want to see me, you want to meet R. You've done your f.b. stalking, you're curious, you aren't smart enough to just call me and ask about him, so you want to meet him. Well, you can wait. We aren't there yet. I don't know when we will be, but when we do, y'all are at the bottom of the list. We are not a side-show, our relationshit does not exist for your entertainment. See, you want to meet him, then you want to go off and talk about him, and me, and the us that is us. I'm not going to give you that pleasure. Not right now. I am me. Still me, always me.

Hey, you.

P.S. Have a nice weekend. I mean it, I really really do. I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy in the general direction of my bloggy friends today, so take it and run with it. Chicago? Sunny and 60 today, Sleet/rain/snow tomorrow and Sunday. F*ck you, Chicago weather, f#ck you.

Hey hey hey

It's Friday. I still owe the evil post about what happens when Von changes her fucking "relationship status" on teh facebook. BUT I don't feel like writing that today. So instead. I'm ordering a tshirt. (see yesterday's comments) AND pointing out the new person over there -------> There -------> in my links. Big Bald Bastard. Not sure where he came from, but I've been reading his stuff and he's funny. So, go there, read funny things. The snark resumes next week. You sleep under the blanket of snark which I provide, and you DARE question the manner in which I provide it?! You want the snark? You can't handle the snark!!! *** grrr!! grrr! grumble!! I tried to link BBB up in this post, and it didn't work!!! grumble grumble....grrr....****

Fridge note

How am I supposed to maintain my mood of glee, nay, elation, that I've decided to spew forth into this cubicle limbo today while being thwarted by LB1? She is being unpleasant. I think she wants to stab me in the eye with sharp objects. Her fuse is very very short today. Like stubby. Like one of those dogs that people cut off their tails when they are puppies stubby. All this On top of me celebrating her anniversary with the company with flowers and mini cupcakes. And I didn't get enough sleep last night. I meant to be home by 10. Not leave R's at 10:30. And I ate Pringles and peanut M&Ms for lunch. And I'm back to being spam when I comment on 3Bulls. Yeah, it's a great fucking day. Uh oh. There goes the glee and elation. It was giving me a rash anyway.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

• Yes, the damn river is green. But guess what? The damn river is ALWAYS GREEN. Whatever.
• Today being today means one sucky thing. That Shamrock Shakes - of which I've only had ONE this year - are going away. You'll be hard pressed to find one. Damn it.
• Instead of going out and drinking with a bunch of amateurs, I'm going to R's. He's cooking corned beef and cabbage. I don't like corned beef and cabbage. I made cupcakes. I'll be having cupcakes for dinner.
• I'm slightly irate because my guitar teacher is playing at one of my favorite bars today. But only until 6pm. Don't these people realize real people have real jobs, that make it difficult to get somewhere by 6pm? Damn musicians.
• I am cranky, thanks for noticing. But it's not like I'm hiding the fact that I have pms. Damn pms.
• I'm waiting, patiently, for Q101 to play ANY Irish song. Like, um, how about a little "Shipping up to Boston"? Or some Flogging Molly? Hell a little Black 47 "Bridie!" never killed anyone! Damn Q101.
• I'm mulling over a post about the ridiculous outpouring of b.s. that came my way when R and I changed our teh facebook relationship status to In a Relationship. It's going to be a good post. Scathing, but good. Stay tuned. Damn teh facebook.
• I've been practicing my chords and switching between them. I practiced for about 40 minutes on Monday, and about 40 minutes on Tuesday. My fingertips hurt, sting, and are a little numb. Damn guitar.
• Top of the mornin' to ya.......

Hello again

I had every intetion to write something yesterday. Being that I was home sick and all. Cough. Cough. Alas. Other things demanded my attention. Like that new fangled toy I got, the DVR. Ah, my life didn't know what it was missing before the DVR. I don't even use it properly. I forget that I can fast forward through commercials if it's something I've taped (DVRed?). I'm getting the hang of it. My Netflix is suffering at the hands of the DVR. But I did manage to watch XMen Origins: Wolverine over the weekend. Not bad. As a former XMen comic book nerd, I have to say they keep the films pretty dead on with the comics. I have no complaints there. And, lots of hot men in this movie. Went to the doctor yesterday. I have the coolest doctor ever. She's so laid back and awesome. We had this conversation: Me: "So. What if I didn't want to get weighed today?" "But you got weighed" "I know. Just saying, what if I didn't want to. What would you do?" "Well, why didn't you want to?" "I had a big lunch. And a big drinking and eating weekend. And oh, yeah, I have pms and I just feel bleh today." "You feel bleh?" "Not sick bleh, just pms bleh." "But you got weighed" "But what if I didn't want to?" "Do you want me to delete your weight for this time?" "Meh" "But you stayed the same. I'm ok with this. You can be ok with this." "Ok. Leave it." "Do you want some candy?" Followed by this conversation: Me: "So. Drinking and this blood pressure medicine...." "Not a problem" "The pharmacist said one drink is ok, but ......" "You can drink, it's fine." "Really? Ok but...." "Now if you drank a lot every day, I'd take you off the medicine." "Really?" "And we'd have a talk...." "I hear those 'talks' are also called 'interventions'" "Yep, that." "I don't drink THAT much." "Then fine. You can stay on the medication." "Ok, thanks Doctor" "Now do you want some candy for that pms?"

And so it goes. And so it goes.

It's Friday. Amen and hallelujah and all that good stuff. Recently, Shannon said to me "I don't understand how you do all of the things that you do" Neither do I. I used to be better about etching out some me time on the weekends, well that seems to have gone right out the window. Damn dating. Takes up me time. To be honest, I can't even blame it all on R. He's pretty much the most un-demanding person I've ever dated. It's me. I'm taking the blame on this one. Last night I even had a dream that I was late to guitar class. I had this dream on a Thursday night. Class is Saturday morning. WTF Of course, once again, I've booked myself all up. Here's what my weekend looks like: Tonight I'm head vol-ing the Battlefield Band/Liz Carroll show at Old Town - this is immediately after work. After that I'm going out with R. Tomorrow I've got guitar class at 11, followed by meeting Shannon at the Lillstreet Art Center for the Open House, followed by Chris' graduation dinner at 5:30, followed by maybe picking R up from work at 11. Sunday I have to clean the house, run errands, do laundry, and meet up with Shannon to help her with the wedding invitations. I'm getting tired. This year I've already added the board of directors thing and guitar classes to my impossibly ridiculous schedule. Something has got to go. I'm just not sure what. Right now German class is the front-runner, but I'm not 100% sure on that. Sigh. Being busy is busy.

How can you not laugh?

Sometimes, I laugh when I shouldn't. Like last night: I'm reading aloud in Deutsch Klasse....."blah blah blah......nachschicken" I stop then, "Nachschicken!" (pronounced properly) teacher looks up at me, puzzled look on her face. Then I say "Nachschicken!!!" (pronounced Knocks Chicken).** Then, I laugh. I laugh so much everyone else laughs. With me, mfers, not at me. Sometimes I don't laugh, out of fear: Once I attempted to learn the tin whistle. I say attempted because I was hot for teacher, and therefore all learning went out the window. Especially when he said things like this: "No. Von, blow harder. HARDER. There, just like that. Now blow more evenly. Bllllloooowwww slllooowwwweeeerrrr. Good. Perfect. Just like that." I didn't laugh, wanted to, and ended up spitting all over my tin whistle instead. I laughed about it for about 3 hours afterwards. **Nachschicken means forward. I know. Weird. Not even close, where you could guess. Not like I'll ever forget that word now though.

Two down

Chords A7 and D are now my bitches. Ok, not really, but I was working on the muscle memory side of it yesterday. I'm awesome that I even practiced. Hopefully I can do it again sometime before Saturday morning. Corey Haim died. Yes, this is a big deal to me, as I was going to marry him someday. Well, when he got clean, and made some $$, and of course I would have to triple-bag that. (Lamblets better not be reading this blog!!) But still. What girl my age didn't want one or both of the Coreys? I waffled between the two, but I think my heart pretty much belonged to Haim, especially after the whole icky wierd Feldman/Michael Jackson thing. The only grown up thing to do is stay up late tonight watching the DVD of "Dream a Little Dream" that Shannon bought for me years ago. Sigh. Perhaps I'll write him a song, one that only uses the A7 and D chords.

Surprise, Surprise

Things I found surprising this weekend:

• I didn't realize how much I missed something, until I got it again.
• Guitar is hard. Not just hard, but fucking hard. Ouch, there's a small blood blister on my finger.
• There is a song written by Hank Williams that has my name in it like three times.
• Reading chords was impossible for me, and I felt stupid (which I found surprising) BUT
• I have the greatest musician friends in the world, and the amount of outside of class help I'm going to get is amazing.
• I didn't hate TheBrother's TheFiance. As a matter of fact, I liked her. As much as snarky, evil, bitchy old me can like a 22 year old chick who got engaged 5 weeks after meeting TheBrother.
• I didn't hate seeing R two days in a row. Probably won't make a habit of it, but I didn't hate it.
• Even John Prine is annoying after three and 1/2 hours.
• I don't hate the band Elbow. I wish I did. I don't. The hipsters, they will not break me.
• We convinced a 44 year old women that Mennonites come from Menonia, a very small country between Germany and France.
• Receiving a gift from a co-worker was both surprising and a huge mood booster. Sure, she bought the earrings for herself, but never wore them, and thought of me when she stumbled across them. They are Phillips head nail heads. I adore them, put them on immediately. The gift and the thought were surprising.
• I don't believe how much I cry when I watch the Oscars. Me? A crier? For shame!!
• Home-made fried chicken, mashed potatoes, corn, gravy, salad and wine with a good friend was the very best way to beat the Sunday blues. (Not surprising, but the meal was soooo good, I had to mention it.) To visit this awesome cooking friend of mine, go here.

Here's to......me

Yep, I'm raising a glass.....to MYSELF.

Tomorrow I start my Guitar 1 class at Old Town.

I'm excited and nervous all at the same time. Got my official song book, got VonDad's wicked awesome guitar all newly strung and tuned and shined up and stuff.

Don't got? The ability to read music. Or follow directions very well.

But I have drive, determination, and guts.

And, I'm cute.

Betcha

Betcha didn't think I was going to post today, did ya? Well, I wasn't! But then I noticed I've posted every other day this week, so why not keep it going. Then, I realize I am having a shit-tastic day at work. And the office smells like poo. So, there you have it, your post for the day. Carry on my way-ward friends. There'll be peace when you are done.

I wanna laugh while the laughin' is easy

Many many (like, a bagillion) years ago, we made a video for my dad. This video (VHS, people!) was part of the gift of the cam-corder he was getting for Christmas. I pretty much hate the silly play we did, but at the end there was a photo montage of VonParents and all of us kiddies. This is the song I remember most and best from that montage. I'd never heard it before, but after we gave Dad the video, I remember watching the end over and over and over, obsessing over this song. Guess what? The lyrics are as relevant to my life now as they were in 1987, when I first heard it, and I'm sure they were relevant in 1973 when this tune first broke. Sometimes, at least when it comes to music, I'm an old soul. Enjoy: Life, so they say, is but a game and we let it slip away. Love, like the Autumn sun, should be dyin' but it's only just begun Like the twilight in the road up ahead, they don't see just where we're goin'. And all the secrets in the Universe, whisper in our ears And all the years will come and go, take us up, always up. We may never pass this way again. We may never pass this way again. We may never pass this way again. Dreams, so they say, are for the fools and they let 'em drift away. Peace, like the silent dove, should be flyin' but it's only just begun. Like Columbus in the olden days, we must gather all our courage. Sail our ships out on the open sea. Cast away our fears And all the years will come and go, and take us up, always up. We may never pass this way again. We may never pass this way again. We may never pass this way again. So I wanna laugh while the laughin' is easy. I wanna cry if it makes it worthwhile. We may never pass this way again, that's why I want it with you.' Cause, you make me feel like I'm more than a friend. Like I'm the journey and you're the journey's end. We may never pass this way again, that's why I want it with you, baby. We may never pass this way again. We may never pass this way again. We may never pass this way again. We may never pass this way again. guess what I'll be buying on iTunes later?

This post has no title....

I just realized that in the after glow of the blast that was at this place I never actually updated you on the other big meet and greet. TheBrother. Well. Gee. It went fine? I mean, wellish? Here's the back story: TheBrother is a mere 25 years young. Not even, he'll be 25 next week. Anyway - TheBrother is in loooooove with the girl he's been dating for six weeks. A mere couple of weeks longer than R and I have been seeing each other. But, like I said, they are in looooove. So, I get to R's place about 8:00 Friday night. I'm not even in the door two seconds when he says "TheBrother got engaged last night". Um. what? "Um, what?" "Not kidding. They're getting married." So, we had about two hours to eat pizza, drink beer, and discuss how vastly stupid TheBrother is. R askes me not to let on that I know about the engagement, we're going to see if TheBrother brings it up. Enter TheBrother "Hi!" "Hi!" blah blah blah 30 seconds later "It's too bad my fiance couldn't be here to meet you too!" and there it is I spent the better part of the next four hours watching R and TheBrother debate/discuss/bicker about the engagement. I didn't opine (yes, smart asses, it DID kill me to keep my mouth shut) mostly because it wasn't my place, and I was trying to make a good impression on TheBrother. R is pretty upset, rightfully so, but it's putting a real damper on things. No making out, too much time spent chatting with TheBrother. Plus, we spend a lot of time talking about TheBrother and this very big thing he's in the middle of. Time spent not getting to know each other. It's getting stale. We'll see. The highlights of the evening? TheBrother went to the Quickie Mart around 1am to get some more beer. He came back with a very cheap bottle of Champagne. He brought in three totally mismatched glasses of bubbly. Handing one to R, one to me, he said "Well, here's to me" he seemed sad when he said it, probably because of all the crap he was getting from R. I said "No. Here's to you! Love is lovely! Good for you and stuff!" and we drank Cheap champagne is sweet and tasty. The other highlight? I asked them to play me a song - they both play guitar - they played me "Peaceful Easy Feeling" by the Eagles. R sang. It was very nice. Time would be better spent charming and romancing me with song, I think. Upside - TheBrother approves of me. He even invited me to his birthday party this weekend. I'm going - I just have to meet this fiance.

One reason the lamblets are awesome....

This is what greeted me when I got to their house on Saturday.

How the hell do you draw a V on an etch-a-sketch?

People are teh awesome

I have to admit here to you all that I'm more than a little gleeful after the big meet and greet at Jennifer's house last night. The rumors are true, I did indeed make Grizzled spit beer once or twice, was charmed and delighted by the lamblets, and have a big ole girl crush on Jennifer herself. I may or may not have overstayed my welcome (it was a 5 + hour "come over for dinner" visit), but I was trying to figure out how to add one awesome dog and one adorable lamblet to the contents of my purse - I was just going to borrow them, I would have returned them eventually - so I might have been stalling. All joking aside. It's a wonderful thing when you meet someone (or in this case a bunch of someones) that you feel like you've known forever, and wish you have known forever. The laughs, snark, beer, chatter, and all around good time was effortless and endless. I see this as the beginning of a beautiful friendship. And You all know you're jealous.

An interesting step

Last Friday, either R or I (I honestly do not remember who) brought up teh Facebook. It was mentioned how we are not "friends" on there, and should maybe be. Both then admitted to having private pages that cannot be easily found. R said that he would send a friend request. Forgot about it, more or less for a few days. Wednesday night R texts that he will un-private his page so I can friend him. 'Why am I friending him?! He should be friending me, grumble grumble' Oh, that's right, this way my page stays private. Aha. The next day I friended him. This got me to thinking. Out of the gate, I had to go pick apart my profile, make sure things looked "presentable". Then I looked at my relationship status. Removed it. Added it back. Removed it. Added it back. Told myself: 'You are acting like an idiot. Are you single? Yes? Then f*ck it. You're thinking too much about this.' So I left it up. Single. Whatever. His page says the same thing, and I'm glad it does. I forced myself to stop thinking so much about it. If he digs around on my fb page, so be it. I pride myself on being who I am at all times - in life, here on my blog, on teh fb, always. So what he sees is what is there. Shouldn't be any surprises. So, is this a "step"? Not sure, really. Just mulling it over a little. He is the first person I've dated that I've been fb friends with. Again, all things had better stay nice and calm and laid back, or I am likely to bolt. The other thing I thought about is this: I will not, not now, likely not ever, tell any man I'm seeing about vonfornow. If hell should freeze over at some point and I have a wedding ring on my finger (and not a second before) only then would I tell the person that gave me that ring about it. It's mine. All mine. I am me here, but a little dialed up (to 11) and a smidge more snarky than I am likely to be in general. I truly do feel the things that I write about, but my filter is way more down on here than elsewhere. I learned a loooong time ago that not everyone has a thick skin, so therefore complete and utter honesty (in my brutal fashion) is not always the best route. So instead, I lay it all out here. For y'all. Because you know you want it. R knows that I comment on some blogs (I had to explain why I was going to "some stranger's house" on Saturday for dinner), but that's all. Tonight's date: Going to his apartment for dinner, beer, and The Meeting of the Brother. I'm a little off kilter about this, because the brother is the #1 person in R's life, so his opinion could have a lot of weight. The one thing I keep reminding myself is TheBrother is 25, and likely I could chew him up and spit him out. for those keeping track, this is the fifth date Have a great weekend. At the very least, tonight could provide me with some good snark I can throw your way.

You can't handle the snark

You want snark? Snark is what you'll get. Wedding snark, that is.

• I sat near the back of the church for two reasons. 1. With the groom pretending to be all Catholic and all, acting like a virgin, I didn't want to get hit by the flying debris when the lightning struck. 2. the priest presiding was the priest that interupted my first kiss by shouting "Whore! Whore! Whore!" and pointing his saintly finger in my face. Thanks, Fr. Cronin, you asshole. And thanks, Rico, for having Fr. Cronin perform your wedding mass and not giving me the heads up, you asshole.
• The bride chose not to have flowers because they allegedly wilt faster in the cold weather. Instead, she opted for feather dusters. Small black feather dusters for the bridesmaids, and a gigantic white feather duster ball for herself. Mmm.hmm. Ok.
• They danced to "At Last" for their first dance. 1. Trite, everyone does it, sigh, ho hum. 2. At Last what? Someone got him to settle down? At Last what people?
• Rico was smart enough to seat my ex's wife at a different table. Karma being what she is and the bitch ended up at my table. At the opposite end from me, but facing me. If looks could kill, both ways, it would have been ugly. Like her. **giggle** I had at least four people ask me what she was doing at my table. That's right, people, at least you know who is queen.
• I drunkenly shucked the strawberry that was hanging out on the edge of my champagne glass on the floor. (It was in my way). Laura slipped and fell two hours later. When asked on Monday if the floor was wet or something, she said "Remember that strawberry?" I had to giggle a little.
• When walking to the bar to get a drink (my 12th or 13th vodka/tonic/lime, I believe), ex grabbed my arm and asked "Are you hitting on B?" - this was in the middle of the dance floor - I yanked my arm back and spat back "What.is.it.to.you?!?!?!" loudly. NO no no, you do not get to ask that question.
• Being asked the above question made me consider hitting on B. However, by that point, remaining upright was slightly more important.
• I might have asked someone who's getting divorced if I can have my $$ back, since he hasn't even been married for 2 years, and I think that warrants a refund.
• I may or may not have told my friend's mother that while three of her children I adore, the other three are evil.
• I may or may not have looked at my friend during the meal, looked around the room, and said "But, it's just sooooo Italian."
• When I walked up the the head table after dinner to say hi to the happy couple, the bride introduced me to her maid of honor. I tried to be all grown up and polite, "Nice toast, lovely dress, blah blah blah." The bride said "Why weren't you at the bachlorette party?!? I had a dick for you.....this bitch is hard core." Nothing but class!
• The CD that was given as a favor sucks. I mean, it has "At Last" on it. I may use it as a coaster.

And also with you

I will review the wedding, later on. Right now, I want to write about the Mass. The wedding had a full Catholic Mass, of course, seeing as the groom went to Quigley Prep Seminary School. *side note: I did musicals at Quigley during high school, which is where I met this entire group of friends. Not ONE of them became a priest. And people wonder why Quigley closed down* Anyway, as I was raised properly, of course I went to the wedding Mass, as it's the ceremony that matters most, more than the party, right? So, we're at Mass. When I wasn't busy cackling and being evil critiquing the whole affair, I did pay some attention to the Mass itself. As mentioned the other day, I don't really go to Mass. I was an altar server in junior high, we were the first class that allowed girls to do that, so it was a pretty big deal. I worked regular Mass, Novenas, stations of the cross, funerals, weddings. I KNOW the Mass. I mean I know it. That's something you don't forget. The part I forgot I loved, and still love is the sign of peace. I mean, break it down "Peace be with you" "And also with you" "Peace.be.with.you" hug, kiss, shake hands with people you don't know. You are wishing someone Peace in their life, and accepting their wish for peace in yours. I know that I could use a LOT more peace in my life. Peace is not only of religion, but it's all encompassing. Bad day at work? Wish for peace and quiet. Bad argument with family? Work towards keeping the peace. Peace. The word itself is calming for me. I do need more peace. Peace in my family life, peace in my relationships, peace in my day to day. To have some of my best friends, the people who know me the best and love me anyway hug me and wish me Peace, that made the whole going to Mass thing worthwhile. That being said: Peace be with you. Each and every one of you. enough niceness. more snark to follow.

It's Friday, I'm (not!) in Love.....

NO, I have not had Dunkin Donuts. NO I have not purchased a breakfast item. NO I AM NOT LOVING MY NEW OATMEAL FUELED WEEKDAY MORNINGS. 38 days to go. Ahem. Tonight is Date #4. pick your God Damned mouths up off the floor. geesh We're going for dinner at the same little Irish place where we went for drinks on our first date. spare me the "awwws" he just wants to try the food there I had a little chat with Jesus. Jesus says I can eat meat for dinner tonight, if I want, in celebration of my fourth date with the same person! Jesus loves me for giving dude with a few strikes against me another chance. And another. And another......you get the idea. Tomorrow I'm going to a wedding. I don't give them very long. I'm thinking. 3.5 years. NO I AM NOT AN EVIL ANTI-MARRIAGE BITCH What I am is realistic. And I know the groom really well. So, I don't really know the bride, but that's because I know enough about the groom to not invest in any woman in his life. He's that friend. The one who shouldn't get married. Ever. I am excited about the wedding because I get to see my largest group of friends, all together in one place. I don't spend as much time as I'd like with this group anymore, so seeing them will be good. Plus, it's one wedding down. Four to go. Yes, this year. Yes, I'm that person this year. Sigh. I just dropped a cheeto in my bra. This is a fact. I'm also checking to see if you're paying attention. Sunday will be errand running, chore doing, then off to John and Toni's for some good food and better conversation. Probably conversation about their wedding. Which is in September. Which I'm campaigning to be in. And it's in Vegas.

Giving up

Yes, I still give things up for Lent. Yes, I also still try to remember to not eat meat on Fridays during Lent. I could give a shit if you do or don't follow Lenten traditions. At best, I am a lapsed Catholic. I don't really believe in going to Mass, and I am wholly against going on High Holy Days and pretending that's good enough. VonMom, I'm looking at you. BUT I am someone's Godmother. Someone old enough to ask what I'm giving up for Lent. She's one of the most important people in my life, so for her I *gulp* try to set a good Catholic example. SO This year? It's going to be a tough one people! I'm giving up Dunkin Doughnuts and everything they sell (good bye, bagel!) for the duration of Lent - C'mon Easter! Get here soon! I'm also giving up buying breakfast during the week. So, if it's not oatmeal or yogurt brought from home, I can't have it. Both of these are going to be big sacrifices. HUGE! But, ultimately, it'll be good for my diet and good for my wallet. But trust me, I will feel that loss! One day down, 39 to go.

Fat Tuesday

What does fat Tuesday mean to me? It means that the office wide Lenten diet mission begins, and there's money to be won. So, that means for today: A cup of french onion soup followed by 1/2 Cheeseburger 1/2 Lobster & Crab burger Some truffle fries Some homemade chips Some berries and vanilla creme at Capitol Grille. That's how I roll, people. Literally, I'm pretty sure I rolled back to the office after that lunch.

To get a read

I need to learn how to get a better read on people. I've got a bit of a conundrum. I should know better by now, though. For about 20 years now (I was very very very young!), I've been around a lot of musicians, actors, dancers, artists. I thought I had developed a good read on people, primarily artistic people. See, the thing about them is that while some a generally nice, warm, outgoing people, others are just pleasant enough to get you to come to their show/expo/whatever. I had been very good at separating the wheat from the chafe on this topic. Case in point, my very very good friend JB. I consider him my best guy friend. We've been friends for 17 years. In those 17 years he has been in many many bands. He's currently in three or four - I can't keep up. I do go to his shows when I can, because I enjoy the music, and his band mates are awesome and I like hanging out with them. JB is my friend, really and truly. Supporting his music is something I do, not something he expects of me. That being said. I have some other people around, acquaintances more than friends, that I can't get a good read on. They are mostly musicians and dancers. The problem could be that they have been artists for so long, that maybe they don't even know whether they are trolling for ticket sales or being open and friendly. I don't know how to figure it out. This is not a huge thing, just something that's been bouncing around my brain for a while.

An update, and a request

Here's the update: Man A: The shy one who digs me some - we're getting together tonight. No clue what we're doing, I think I'll leave that up to him. I'm tired. Exhausted really, after a late late night of partying with some wacky Germans. Weiberfastnacht (I think?) = crazy good times. Anyway. I'd be happy if we either have a couple of drinks, or hang out. Not too much. There better be some good kissing this time. Man B: The one that may be losing interest - I called him out via email. Still can't get a good read, but those that I've let read the email think he's not dis-interested, just super busy and not sure what he wants right now. Mmmm hmm. Because I look like the grrrrl that will sit sighing by the phone, waiting for him to decide he has time for me? Not.So.Much. So, out with Man A tonight. Here's the request: You all will be my Valentines. Okey dokey? Actually, this is not so much a request than a demand. The way you all zardoz the hell out of me, laugh with and at me, raise me up, keep me in line, care about me, care less about my flaws - you all are the perfect Valentines, so you are MINE ALL MINE ALL MINE!!!! Sending chalky pastel candy hearts your way. xoxo

Man troubles

I having some man trouble. So, no posts right now, while I work things out. Things like Man A likes me a lot. A lot a lot. But he's shy, among other strikes against him. He makes me sigh, in a not great way. Man B all of the sudden likes me not so much. Like ALL OF THE SUDDEN. As in 180 people. And he will be called out on it. Soon. He makes me sigh, in a sad way. I'm taking a mini break from this blog (like, this week) and a mini break from them. (like a day or two) Then I'll be back. Hopefully stronger than ever. Doesn't help with Sunday being Sunday and all.

Blessed and Lucky.

So, I haven't written a post in a while, huh? Well, was busy last week taking care of some zardoz business over someplace else. Who was #400? Oh, yeah, that was ME!!! *ahem* here's the damn post I had been working on before I got busy and distracted....... I got an email last Wednesday, one that I assumed had gone to the entire volunteer community of the Old Town School of Folk Music. It said: We could use some help selling merchandise for the Rosanne Cash show at the Harris Theater on Friday.....blah blah blah. I deleted it. My first thoughts were that I didn't want to stay downtown after work on Friday. Usually Fridays by 4:30 I'm so ready to head for the hills, or at least out of the Loop and closer to my own digs. Last Thursday morning I woke up, and Woke the F UP. This is Rosanne Cash. As in nominated for a Granny Rosanne Cash. "Seven Year Ache" Rosanne Cash. A legend in her own right, not to mention who her dad was..... 8:00 am I email Old Town's volunteer manager: You wouldn't happen to still need help for the Rosanne Cash, do you? sit and stew stew and sit sit and stew 3:00 pm response received: Von, sure, we'd love to have you help out. Here are your instructions..... Instructions that included how to get backstage, and how to get my ticket to the show! The show was amazing. Beyond amazing. Fantastic. Her voice, I can't even talk about it. Which is saying something for me, because as a general rule I dislike female singers. I like some, but they have to have some distinct character to their voices for me to like them at all. For example, I like Stevie Nicks, Natalie Merchant, Joan Jett, Mary Chapin Carpenter, and now Rosanne Cash. There has to be something extra there for female singers to hold my attentions. (I know, it's a weird thing, but it's my thing, whatever) So after the show we have to return the merch and count the $$. Where do we do this? Backstage. We get there (all access pass? yes? go right through) and there's no more than 10 people there. And Rosanne Cash. As a rule, I leave the artists alone. This is true of me at Old Town, Folk & Roots, anywhere where I'm doing something that has musicians involved. They've done their job, it's rest time, leave them alone. As we were getting ready to head out, one of the other people I was working with (D) was stalling. "What?" "I don't know what to do?" "What? You want to meet her, don't you?" "Kinda. Yes. Yes I do" "Well, go do it. This is your only chance, probably ever. She's up for a Grammy in two days. Do it. Just go over there." We were overheard by our "boss" for the evening, an awesome staffer at Old Town, A. She took us right over to Rosanne and introduced us all. Rosanne was one of those genuinely warm people. You know the ones - she took your hand to shake it in both of hers. She leaned in to talk, made eye contact, touched your arm when she thanked us for helping out. I told her she was fantastic. Because she was. On stage, in person, just all around. After the big meeting, we headed out. We were in Millennium Park, and it was snowing. It wasn't cold cold, there was no wind. It was 11:00 at night, so there weren't really any other people around. The city was all clean and twinkly and quiet, just beautiful. I stopped walking (as I sometimes do) and just looked all around me, taking it all in, hoping to remember the entire evening forever. As I was getting in the cab, I thought 'Blessed and lucky. Some people, many people, would never even have a chance to have this experience. 1,000 people at that concert tonight would have paid big bucks to meet her. I truly am a very lucky girl.' I think the part of me that is finally growing up can see that I do have really amazing experiences in my life, and I need to stop taking them for granted. ** Side note. I highly, HIGHLY recommend you go and buy Rosanne's new album "The List", which is based on a list of songs her dad gave to her when she was 17 or 18. Amazing. With guest artists Bruce Springsteen, Elvis Costello, and others!**

Fridge Note

To: 3Bulls From: Vonfornow Dudes - I'd love to post many many comments over dere at your bloggy blog, BUT It keeps telling me that I'm basically SPAM, and doesn't want my comments. PLEASE FIX. okthanksbye

In case I end up a Lifetime cautionary tale:

Dear Readers, I'm going on a "daaate" tonight. I use the word daaaate because it's not really a date. I'm meeting one of the Plenty of Fish people for a drink. NO, it's not the married one. I've cut married guy loose, and I think he finally took the hint. This guy is a transplant from New Jersey. We haven't talked on the phone, but we've texted. He's funny. He thinks I'm "awesome" We'll see. He already has one major strike against him - No car. This is a problem and potential deal breaker. You all know how much I hate driving, so my future ex-husband needs to a) have a car and b) be willing to drive me all over the damn place - like, say Milwaukee? - I'm actually not really excited about it. There's another guy that I think I will ultimately like much better (he's an author!). But for karma's sake, I'm going to meet Rob. Got that? His name is Rob. I met him on Plenty of Fish. He's from New Jersey. So if I end up MIA or dead (not cooly zombie-fied, just dead) or something - you've got some intel for teh police. kthanksbye **plus, I have a much more important first meeting on Saturday that I'd really like to be alive for**

Remember?

Remember a whillllllle ago I wrote a post about the twins that I wanted to get back in touch with? M & B? Well, through internet stalking and teh Facebookz I've found them both, and we keep in touch and stuff. Just found out on B's FB page that M is in Haiti. And he's in the hospital. Yeah, um, NO, he's not a doctor. He's a college professor. B says that he was taken to the hosiptal for "something minor". Well, it's Haiti, so I'm guessing it's not that minor, and I'm worried what kind of care he's getting. Please keep him in your thoughts/prayers/whatever.

The weekend

Sitting here, watching me some football. "Are you ready for some foooootttbaaaaaalll!!!" Every time. I do that every time I watch football. So, here's my weekend. Friday I volunteered at Trad Fest at Old Town. It was awesome. It's always awesome. It's this annual event they have. It's a big gigantic open house thing. There's a pot luck dinner, and live bands, and song circles, and jams, and Cajun dancing, and square dancing. It's a ridiculous good time. I'm grateful I got to be there. I worked the door, so collected money, kept track of the will call and comp lists, stuff like that. Worked with Dierdre, and she's pretty awesome. We met some adorable gays named Harry and Benji. They were so fabulous I wanted them to adopt me right away. Saturday was kinda crap. I went to DANK to register the adult students for their new semester. Nice for all but one of the entire class to not show up this week. C'mon people, 8am on a Saturday? And now I have to do it again!?!? They are going to get a very stern email from me. Better be there next week, grumble grumble. After that I had to go get a new tire. Sigh. VonMOm would tell you it's all my fault, and I'm a shitty driver, blah blah blah. The fact of the matter is that my tires are about 7 years old, and well, they're old. So that evily high curb I clipped might not have cashed my tire if the darn things weren't so old. Like I have $$ for a new tire. Went home and napped after that. I ended up napping too long, and had no get-up-and-go after that. I ended up staying home and watching really bad television. I mean really bad. I mean "The Pregnancy Pact" on Lifetime bad. I went to bed super early just because I was bored. This morning I was at the grocery store by 8:30. It was awesome. It was like my own private grocery store. Went to book club this afternoon. Awesome. Fantastic book, great book club gals, good bar, good beer. Sitting here, watching football. I'm a girl, so it's basically like this "I don't like that Manning guy. I hope his team loses" No such luck. Now, it's "I don't like Brett Favre. I hope his team loses." Annnnd. It's Sunday.

They certainly are

I went to a Catholic, all girls high school. I don't talk about it much. Mostly because it was forever ago, but also because I don't think there's much to write about there. However. There was one thing my senior year that was awesome, and affects me to this day. Some time during the second half of my senior year, we got to vote on a class song. The way it was explained to us was that this song was going to be for us. It would be ours right there in that moment of graduating high school, and it would be ours forever after. At the time of the vote, I thought a few things: I don't really give a shit I do like that one song, but there's no way it'll win How much will I really think about this years from now? Well, I was wrong - The song that won was "These are days" by the 10,000 Maniacs, which was the song I wanted to win. Not only was Natalie Merchants voice fantastic, the words were just so appropriate to that time. It's like it was written just for us. I heard that song the other day while I was driving to Old Town. I blasted it, and sang every sing word. Surprising even myself, I teared up a little. I realized that while those lyrics were appropriate my senior year, they are still appropriate today. Not only are they appropriate, but they have a way of calming me and making me happy at the same time. I realized that the promise of what the present is, and what the future can be exists every day. I just have to remember to look for it. It's pretty awesome that I can claim this song as mine. These are days you'll remember Never before, and never since, I promise Will the whole world be warm as this And as you'll feel it You'll know it's true That you -you are blessed and lucky It's true - that you Are touched by something That will grow and bloom in you These are days you'll remember When May is rushing over you With desire to be part of the miracles You see in every hour You'll know it's true That you are blessed and lucky It's true - that you Are touched by something That will grow and bloom in you These are days These are the days That you might fill with laughter Until you break These days you might feel a shaft of light Make its way across your face And when you do You'll know - how it was Meant to be See the signs and know their meaning You'll know - how it was Meant to be Hear the signs and know they're speaking To you To you *happy weekend to you*

annnnnnd

Thanks very much. I giggled. A lot. And I even laughed. Maybe guffawed a bit. I turned on my computer way more than I thought I would over the weekend. My mood is much improved. Thanks again. NOW back to the snark and bitchiness that is usually me.

I could be wrong

But I think the Zardoz is over. And the bloggy blog survived it. Now, to add Smut Clyde, and Mandos, and 3Bulls (which I can't believe I didn't already have!). to my blog-roll (yep, I am that easy) **word verf back on - that was a temporary thing**

Random thoughts on a drizzly Friday

Things I'm thinking about on this day before the three day weekend: (in no particular order, and posted as randomly as they float around in my brainz)

• Spiders and gross fish guts (thanks Jennifer and Fish!) are gross
• Is phone sex cheating?
• I like The Samples. What ever happened to them? They made some smooth tunes
• Thinking of quitting Plenty of Fish now that I know -for a fact - that one of the guys I'm talking to is TOTALLY MARRIED
• Above mentioned guy is a total fucker
• I'm extremely sleep deprived. I maybe can sleep in on Monday. That would be good - Monday. Yep, sleeping on Monday.
• How sleep deprived to I have to get before I get some clarity?
• If I took one letter out of my first name, and said it backwards, it would be pronounced Envy. I consider this to be awesome
• I can't believe I've never thought of the above before.
• If a tree falls in the woods....crap....I can't remember the rest of that phrase, so I guess it's irrelevant.
• I like cheese
• I'm having an incredibly shitty day at work. If I get chucked under the bus one more time, I may not get up again
• Popcorn for lunch sounds pretty good right about now
• Will that one guy text me today?
• Should I give that other guy my number, in case he wants to text me?
• How can I get that third guy to stop texting me?
• It's only life
• I still hate the person that invented speakerphones. I also hate overtly loud talkers, and uptalkers
• I hope Crush-man comes to Stammtisch tonight. That would rock
• I wonder what I did to Chris this time. Jumping into that fire on Sunday when I just show up at her house to give her and Lizzie presents.
• *****static**************

Hope you enjoyed that little glimpse. Have a great weekend, see you on the flip-side.

Don't do anything I wouldn't do, but keep in mind, there's not much I wouldn't do.....

C is for.....

Now what starts with the letter "C"?" Cookie" starts with "C"!Let's think of other things that starts with "C"! Uh. . .Uh. . . Who cares about da other things?!( CHORUS)x2"C" is for Cookie that's good enough for me,"C" is for cookie that's good enough for me,"C" is for cookie that's good enough for me,Oh! cookie, cookie, cookie starts with "C"! Hey, You know what? A round cookie with one bite out of it looks like a "C" A round donut with one bite out of it also looks like a "C" but it is not as good as a cookieOh, and the moon sometimes looks like a "C" but you can't eat that So...(CHORUS)Cookie Cookie Cookie Starts with "C"Cookie Cookie Cookie Starts with "C"C is for cookie, that's good enough for me! COOKIE COOKIE COOKIE STARTS WITH C!!!!!

Whining

Rarely am I a whiny little brat. Bitchy? Yes, and frequently, but whiny? Noooo. Well, today I am a whiny little brat. I hurt my "good" knee a few days ago. I don't even know what I did to it. I'm guessing that last Thursday when I had to stand on the Metra the whole way downtown might have been the problem. Now my right knee has no inclination to bend. It also kept me up all night last night, with pain just about everywhere. Therefore: me = whining. There are days (few, though) that I wish I lived with someone, anyone else, so I had someone to help me out. I asked the dust bunnies if they would lend a sista a hand, they were having none of it. I can only take Tylenol, so I choose to take nothing, and suffer through it. Monday laughs at me.

Snowing

So, yep, it's snowing. It does that. Here. In the Midwest. In Chicago specifically. Not only is the snow annoying.... BUT even more annoying?? The people on the facebook that have status updates berating the people that are complaining about the snow. Shut.Up. You are just as annoying as the people complaining. BECAUSE YOU ARE ALSO COMPLAINING. Just not about the snow. We're looking at a foot or so of the white fluffy stuff. I have a) a 4 wheel drive little SUV thingy and b) a garage to park it in. Hence and therefore, I'm not complaining about the snow. so there

The best parts of my 10 day staycation (voncation? kidding. go see MenD's comments):

• Saw all of my most favorite people. This includes: Laura, Shannon, TheMarty, Chris, Lizzie, Victor, John, Toni, Jessica, Tim, Doc, Caroline, the J5, lots and lots of all of my favorite people.
• Watched the most recent season of "Lost". I'm all caught up and looking forward to 2/2/10!
• Purchased and watched season 1 of "Glee". I'm a gleek. I wish I could belt out a song or two at random too. Might try this. At work. Like maybe some "Working for the weekend" on Friday afternoon. I'm no Rachel, but I can hang. (or at least carry a tune)
• Started and finished MenD's scarf. It's taking me a lot less time to make an awesome scarf, I still enjoy the process, and I'm getting better! Maybe something new next, like a hat? Nah, I'll stick to scarves for a while. I crochet, I do not knit - mix them up and I will stab you with a crochet hook, got it?
• Took naps. Lots of naps. Nearly every day. And I was ok with it. Work is h a r d.
• Finished reading "The Post Birthday World" (the jury is out, gotta chat about it with my friend that lent it to me).
• Also read "The Glass Castle" in ONE DAY. The book was amazing. Have I ever mentioned I'm slightly obsessed with the Appalachian poor?
• Was super-duper nice to VonMom on numerous occasions, which were acknowledged and appreciated.
• Had a wicked wild time at FunTuesday - which can only be had at Daily, and only with Shannon and TheMarty. Also had at FunTuesday (by me): 3 pints Hoegaarten, 3 Jameson shots, 2 Washington Apple shots, 1 grape "penalty shot" (for yawning), 1 shot of Petron. Yes, you may puke now. Surprisingly, I didn't.
• Discovered two new songs that are on repeat on my iPod (and I'm not ashamed!) "Snuff" by Slipknot - fucking ridiculous how much I love this song. AND. "Need you now" by Lady Antebellum - not a country fan, but this song rips my heart right out of my chest, every time. Slipknot and Lady Antebellum in the same sentence? I'm nothing if not musically eclectic.
• Met some super awesome new womenfriends at Chickmas last night. It was a great night, and I was so glad to be invited!
• Lost about 90 minutes in a drunken red wine haze on Christmas Eve, but managed to control myself and A) No one was any the wiser to my debauchery and B) I didn't piss anyone off and C) no Christmas morning hangover! Thanks Step-bros for bringing expensive wine that didn't make me puke in my stocking Christmas morning.
• Surprise box of homemade awesome from Boston Lauren. While it made me pine for my Boston folks, I cheered myself up with the choc chip cookies, peppermint bark, and fudge.
• Well thought out gifts trumped all this year. I was lucky enough to get two: from TheGodmother, who is someone I adore - a pair of perfect earrings. Exactly what I was looking for. She picked them out on her own, not knowing I was in the market for tasteful yet awesome earrings for everyday. She rocks. Followed by gift from Laura: a movie collection. Not just any movie collection, no - the Jim Henson Fantasy Collection. As in Labyrinth, The Dark Crystal, and MirrorMask. So suited to the me that is really me that Laura knows better than almost anyone else.
• Manis/pedis and Red Lobster with VonSis and Sil1x. I was exhausted and hung over, and it was exactly what I needed. Pretty red nails make the winter blues go away.